Still
by impavidus
Summary: After the war, the factions are rebuilding, and Shiloh Anderson is trying to find where she belongs.
1. Chapter 1

_ This story takes place one year after the war. I am disregarding much of the second and third books, and the whole gene perfecting idea. Jeanine and Max have been eliminated. Eric has taken place as the main Dauntless leader, and though he was not in with Jeanine or Max, he is still almost the same mean man we met in the books. No one is hunting Divergents anymore, and those who are Divergent are free to chose a faction just like others, but are still encouraged not to speak about their test results, as it is still a taboo subject._

I

I'm fairly certain this is one of the last times I will awake in my room. The walls are painted a bright yellow that I assume is supposed to be cheerful. There is a small closet holding loose red and yellow dresses, skirts, and tops. Our house is on the edge of the compound, so my window overlooks the vast fields. It is summer, and the fields are brimming with the warm-seasoned plants that our faction grows. I can't deny that it is a beautiful place. Unfortunately, I also can't deny that I don't belong.

I hear a gentle knocking on my door. No one bursts into a room here uninvited. That would be rude and invasive. We are always conscious of others, and their feelings. Sometimes I think we're nearly as bad as Abnegation. I glance at the clock near my bed. Because of the early morning hour, I know that my mother likely stands outside my door, waiting for my permission to enter.

"Come in." I call out towards the door, attempting to keep my voice light and airy. It is a struggle. Hopefully I won't have to pretend for much longer. The door opens slowly. Always slowly. Nothing is ever rushed. My mother stands at the door, breakfast in hand. One of the benefits of living in Amity is that we get to eat the freshest food. Right from the ground to our tables. But we only eat the food grown, never the livestock. We don't argue with the factions who do consume meat. Always neutral, always treading carefully. I guess that even now, maybe more so than ever, less than a year after the war, the factions are still cautious towards each other.

I glance towards the breakfast; a bowl of strawberries and a few pieces of toast. I'm still wary about the bread. They used to put small doses of the peace serum in the bread, but after the war it was abolished. Johanna, one of our leaders, decided that if we truly believed in being peaceful, then we should be able to try on our own. Of course, many people still dose their bread with the serum for a little extra help. I simply take the bowl of strawberries, ignoring the toast, and sit down on the edge of my bed. My mother does not bring me breakfast unless she wants to talk. Usually it's because I've gotten in trouble at school or elsewhere. I have a slight problem with keeping my temper. We're not supposed to argue here, or break the rules. That usually leads to me being led to a quiet room. I've never gone so far as to need a peace serum injection. But I usually get a phone call to home, where a long talk will await me. Today, however, I know she wants to talk because I'm taking my aptitude test later.

She sits down next to me, taking my hand gently in hers. My mother looks very much like me, or I suppose I look like her, though we have different eyes and her hair is darker. My father was killed in the war, trying to get in between a Dauntless soldier and an innocent Abnegation man. Since then, my mother has been more protective. I'm certain she's here to pick my brain, hoping I will stay here. I try to sit still and be peaceful, like she has taught me. It shouldn't be so difficult. But it is. My leg begins to twitch.

"Shiloh…" Her voice is not as melodic as usual. There is a raspiness in it that I have never heard. I look at her and I'm startled to see that she looks unhappy. Not just unhappy, but like she is facing turmoil. Navy eyes meet my silver ones. I try and wait patiently before she speaks. She surprises me by simply grasping my hand firmly, kissing me on the cheek, and standing.

"Go ahead and get ready. Cole is coming to take you to school." She strides out of the room, and shuts the door behind her a little more rushed than usual. It is then that I realize the reason for her agitation. My mother knows that I will not be staying in Amity. She knows that I will be leaving her forever. I am breaking her heart.

I wonder how long she has known. I think back on my behavior for the past sixteen years. It was probably apparent to her from the start. I had always struggled. It wasn't that I was unkind, more that I was mischievous, and always questioning the ways of our faction.

There is little I can do at this point, other than remind myself that since the war, factions do intermingle a bit more. Occasionally I see other factions in Amity, and family is now allowed to visit on the second day of each month if they wish. At least I know that I will see her again, no matter that I will break her heart at the Choosing Ceremony tomorrow. Before I can drag myself further down, I think of seeing Cole this morning, which cheers me up marginally, and head to my closet to get dressed. I find a red dress; I try to stay away from the yellow as much as possible. The red isn't too bad, but it's still too loose for my taste. I don't have any time left, so I quickly slip on a pair of sandals and leave my hair down.

There is no sign of my mother in the house, but Cole is waiting for me outside in his truck. The day is sunny and bright, casting a light on his head. His blonde hair is a shade darker than mine, and he has our mother's blue eyes, but we still are strikingly similar looking. When we were little, many people though we were twins. Only when he grew to be much taller than me did that comparison stop. He chose to stay in Amity two years ago, and he is right where he belongs. I am lucky to have grown up with someone who comes so naturally by kindness.

"Hey Cole. Nice truck." I comment, smiling widely at him. Cole smiles, though I say the same thing to him every time I see the truck. It's old and beat up, but still, it is a car, and he is proud that he saved up for it. He works many hours on the farms, and sometimes when I'm bored, I join him, if only to get away from the house. Cole opens the passenger door for me, and soon we are headed inside the gates. He is much quieter than usual. If my mother knows, then Cole definitely does too.

He drops me off at the front of the school building, giving me a long hug. If anyone was to visit me once I'm no longer Amity, I know that it would be Cole. I feel myself breaking a bit as he squeezes me tight.

"No matter what, you're always my sister." His voice is still smooth, but I can see in his eyes that he is struggling to keep his composure. I nod, not wanting to lose it right before school, and give him one more quick hug. I watch as he drives away until his truck is just a speck, and set out for my first class.

...

A few hours later, I am waiting for my name to be called with all of the other sixteen year olds in the school. Sitting with a group of other Amity that I don't really interact with much, I try and stay in the conversation, but my eyes wander to the other faction groups, wondering which I will be told to enter into after today.

The Abnegation sit perfectly still in the corner, nearly blending into the wall in their grey clothes. If I don't fit into Amity, I would never fit into Abnegation. Candor sits in a large circle, and they are laughing, a large blur of white and black. I don't think I could tell the truth all the time. Erudite sits near Candor, reading books or otherwise debating. I've always done well in school, and enjoy it even. But do I believe in knowledge above all else? The rowdiest group, the Dauntless, sit in the back of the room, arm-wrestling and chattering loudly. Dauntless looks fun, but I'm not sure I'm strong enough. They are warriors.

"Shiloh Anderson." I jump as I hear my name, and follow the others who were called into the hallway of testing rooms. I am directed to room two, where an Abnegation man waits. He is wearing the standard grey uniform, and standing next to a chair with a bunch of wires hooked up to it.

"Don't be nervous. It will be over before you know it." His voice is steady and calm, like he has said this many times over. I sit down into the chair and he hooks me up, connecting wires to the sides of my head, before producing a clear liquid. I sniff it questioningly. The man watches me, but offers me no insight. I'm desperate for my test results, so I sling the liquid back, wincing slightly as it hits the back of my throat.

...

I jerk awake after what seems like hours, facing the Abnegation man again. He is unhooking the electrodes from my head, his lips set in a tight line that I'm not used to seeing on an Abnegation face.

"What was that?" I ask, sitting up and rubbing my eyes. Flashes of images barrage my brain. I remember the dog coming towards me...He continues unhooking all the wires before answering me.

"That was a simulation. It helps us determine which faction you belong in based on the choices you made.." He turns to his computer, typing, before turning to face me.

"You may not discuss your results with anyone." The man pauses, rubbing his forehead, before looking back at me again. His eyes seem more intense.

"As you know, there are people who are competent for more than one faction. You showed equal competence for both Erudite and Dauntless. Even though these people are no longer hunted, I would advise that you do not tell anyone what you are. It is still a difficult subject." The serum is still wearing off, or maybe I'm in shock, so I don't quite register what he is saying at first.

"What…I don't understand what you're saying. What faction do I belong in?" I question, standing up. His lips tighten.

"I'm saying..." He pauses. "I'm saying that you are Divergent."

**So not my best writing, and not the most exciting chapter. I will probably go back and edit as time goes on. Next chapter will be much more exiting, I promise! I love reading reviews, so please leave one!**


	2. Chapter 2

_So I went back and forth on this, and decided to use to movie descriptions of the characters. I felt like it would just be easier, and also just because Jai Courtney. _

II

I have a surprising amount of energy considering I've been awake half the night. The sleep that I did get was punctuated with vivid dreams, retelling the simulation I had faced. The Abnegation man had not elaborated anymore on my results, simply dismissing me as if I was like everyone else. I wondered how many Divergents there really were in our city. Now I was _one_ of them. As if I needed my life to be more complicated. I had spent much of the night reviewing my life up until now, trying to place myself in either Erudite or Dauntless. It worried me that the two factions I had shown aptitude for were also the two factions who's leaders had tried to exterminate another faction. What did that say about myself?

"Knock it off Shiloh." I mutter to myself. The people who had taken down Jeanine and Max were also from Erudite and Dauntless, though no one knew quite who it was. All that was known was that they had to be Divergent; everyone else had been under mind control. Suddenly the Dauntless and Erudite had woken up and found themselves far from where they last remembered. Jeanine and Max were found dead on Erudite headquarters, and Divergents were no longer considered dangerous. Still, people harbored many reserves about them. Could a Divergent be loyal to one faction? I clench my fists. I **would** be loyal to whichever faction I chose. I would find where I belonged.

I give up on trying to decide, and focus instead on getting dressed. I find my favorite red dress, a simple sleeveless number that doesn't go all the way to my knees. It's hot outside, so I choose to wear a pair of beige sandals. I contemplate my hair in the mirror. I have the same golden hair the rest of my family does, and it goes to the middle of my back. I decide to just leave it down, knowing that I will likely style it differently once I get to my new faction. Whichever one that might be. I take one last glance around my room. This is it.

My mother and Cole are waiting for me in the downstairs kitchen. Cole has taken the day off to come to the choosing ceremony. We all stare at each other for a moment. There isn't really anything I've learned to help me say goodbye. How do I thank my mother for all the love she has given me, and for letting me go now? How do I tell Cole how much I love him, even though I'm going to be leaving him? A deep pit seems to be tugging at the center of my stomach. Before I can speak, they both envelop me, and now I am certain I will cry. I can smell my mother's light perfume mixed with Cole's outdoorsy smell. I choke back the tears, determined to stay strong for them. I will miss them, but I cannot stay here. They are both crying now as they let go of me.

"Are you ready?" Cole asks, wiping away the tears from his cheeks. I nod, and we all take a moment to compose ourselves before heading outside. This year, Amity is hosting the choosing ceremony, so we simply walk to the large auditorium in the center of the compound, following a mass of other red and yellow clad individuals. I give my mother and Cole one last lingering hug before finding my place in line, which is ordered alphabetically. An Erudite boy and Dauntless girl stand on either side of me, and if I wasn't so anxious, I might have laughed. I will be one of the last initiates to choose. Hopefully I will have made my decision before that time comes.

A hush came over the auditorium as Johanna, the Amity leader, took the stage. I have never met Johanna, but I have seen her many times. The scar that covers her face cannot mask the brightness in her eyes. I sneak a glance at my small family that sits among the Amity. They are watching Johanna with an almost reverent expression on their face, like most of the Amity. She was an integral part of stopping the war, and many of our faction owes their lives to her decisions. Johanna clears her throat, and smiles at each faction in turn, before addressing the initiates.

"Initiates, you have reached one of the most important days of you life. Today, you will choose your place among us. Those who value peace and kindness above all will join Amity. Those who believe in honesty and truth shall find their place in Candor. Those who wish to live selflessly and for others will belong in Abnegation. Those who value intelligence and knowledge shall be Erudite. Finally, those who believe in courage and bravery will find their home in Dauntless." She pauses, taking a deep breath, and I guess that she is about to address the war.

"Last year, our way of life was threatened by individuals who deflected away from their factions beliefs. Our society must be rebuilt to be stronger than ever. That is why your choice today is especially important. You will help us build a new, stronger way of living. Together, we shall become strong again." Applause follows her words, and I see people from all factions nodding in agreement. My stomach is in a knot again as the first initiates are called to choose. I've been to many choosing ceremonies, and this one seems no different. There is always a sense of pride from the factions once someone has chosen. Many initiates stay in their faction, which is usual. When there is a transfer, there seems to be less fallout than in previous years. Perhaps we _are_ becoming stronger. The Dauntless girl to my left is finally chosen, and I feel like I might be sick. She cuts her hand, and joins Candor. My hands are shaking.

"Shiloh Anderson." I take a deep breath, and make my way up the stairs to the stage. Johanna hands me a knife as I step towards the bowls. I wonder if I'll pass out. I pierce my hand, not even feeling the cut, and blood begins to pool in my hand. I look at the water in the Erudite bowl, a dark red now, and then the smoking coals in the Dauntless bowl. Suddenly, my choice seems obvious. Like I've been worrying for nothing. I release my gripped hand, and my blood sizzles on the coals.

There are loud cheers from the Dauntless. I risk a look at Cole and my mother. They look shocked at my choice of Dauntless, but they give me a reassuring smile through their tears. I join the rest of the Dauntless transfers as the last initiates choose, and the ceremony draws to a close. Then, the Dauntless-born are running out the door, and the transfers follow. I realize that my sandals will only hinder me, so I throw them off. We head towards the edge of the train tracks, where the train is about to roar through. The Dauntless-born swing themselves into the cars, and I figure that this is part of our initiation. I quickly find the next open car, and fling myself inside, rolling to my feet as quickly as I can. I hear the screams of elation of the Dauntless in the cars in front of us. My fellow transfers swing into the car; we've all made it for now. The train seems to be heading deep into the city.

I take these moments to check out my fellow transfers. I am the only Amity transfer, and there are no Abnegation. There are five transfers from Candor, and four from Erudite. Most of the transfers are boys, but there is one Erudite girl and two Candor girls. The Erudite girl comes to sit next to me. She has long ebony hair that lies in sharp contrast against her pale skin. She's a few inches taller than me, and slender.

"Wild isn't it? I'm Jena by the way." I shake her hand as she grins toothily. We seem to be heading towards the center of the city. I've never been farther than the school. The buildings are much taller here. Jena and I jump up as we hear yells from the other cars. The Dauntless-born are jumping from the train onto a gray roof. I look at Jena.

"Here's goes nothing." We both scream, and jump. It's the craziest rush I've ever felt. I hear the screams of the other transfers as they follow us. I almost manage to land on my feet, but my legs were shaking too much, and so I topple over. I brush off the dust from my dress, and we head over to where the Dauntless-born have congregated. They are standing near the edge of the building. A man stands there, an impatient air about him. He can't be much older than us, but even the Dauntless-born seem wary of him. He has two black piercings above his right eyebrow, and tattoos that climb down his neck. He's probably the most muscled person I've ever seen, and tall. Once we've all gathered around him, he begins to speak. His voice is deep and cutting.

"My name is Eric. I'm one of the Dauntless leaders. I will also be supervising your training. Our transfers have the honor of jumping first." Eric gestures to the edge of the building. There is silence.

"Come on, isn't _anyone_ here brave enough?" His voice is mocking, a smirk on his face. I look from him to the edge of the building. If I want to make an impression, I might as well start now. If I don't jump, I will be factionless, and that simply isn't going to happen. I step forward, walking towards Eric. He raises his eyebrows, his eyes scanning my red dress. I try to look determined.

"A greenie as the first jumper. Must be a weak transfer group." I clench my teeth together. 'Greenie' is a meant as an insult towards someone who is from Amity. He's expecting me to chicken out at the last second. I can't give him the satisfaction. I step on the edge of building and look down. There is a large hole in the center. I can feel Eric's eyes on me, and before he can insult me further, I jump. The building around me passes by, and suddenly I'm bounced up. _A net._ I can hear cheering somewhere nearby. Two pairs of hands pull me out of the net. There is a handsome young man with dark hair and eyes, and a small, pretty girl with dark blonde hair. They are both young, and adorned in all black. The girl has a visible tattoo on her collarbone, three birds.

"I'm Tris and this is Four." The girl says, steading me on my feet. I can tell by the way she looks at Four, and how he looks at her, that they are together in some way. "Welcome to Dauntless. Name?" Tris is eyeing my red dress, a slight look of surprise on her face. I wonder when the last Amity transfer to Dauntless was. My eyes are slowly adjusting to the deep underground.

"Shiloh." Tris nods, pulling me forward to stand aside. Four turns around, cupping his hands around his mouth.

"First jumper, Shiloh!" I finally am able to see the mass of Dauntless that have gathered to watch the initiates arrive. I hear screams as the other transfers and Dauntless-born begin to land in the net. Another pair of Dauntless named Uriah and Marlene take the Dauntless-born away, while we are left with Eric, Tris, and Four. Jena comes to stand with me as we look around in awe. We are shown the central area of Dauntless, called the Pit, and our training arena, before we are led to our dorm. Everywhere I look there is liveliness. Everyone is moving. I think I'm already falling in love with it here. We are stopped in our dorm, where we will all stay. Five bunk beds line the walls, and even in the poor light I can see that the bathroom isn't the nicest. There is a lack of privacy, but I'm sure I'll get used to it. I'll have to. Eric steps forward again, and we all are instantly silent. You get the feeling that he's not the sort of person you want to cross.

"Transfers, training will begin tomorrow morning. There are three stages of initiation. After the first stage, the weakest four will be cut. After the final stage, the top ten initiates will be made Dauntless." There is a tense silence now. My heart is racing. There is a chance I will be left factionless. I counted ten Dauntless-born. That means that after the first four were cut, six more still wouldn't make it. Some of us in this room would be factionless. We're all sizing each other up now. One of the Candor boys, who's name I think is Cam, opens his mouth as if to speak. He probably can't help it, being from Candor. Eric silences him with one look.

"If this would have changed your mind about choosing Dauntless, then you should have chosen another faction." No one speaks after that, and Four tells us we should change and get ready for dinner. Four, Tris, and Eric leave us to figure out the sleeping situation. Jena and I find a bunk together. Cam, the Candor boy who tried to speak, claims a bunk next to us. He has a nice face, framed with wavy dark hair and hazel eyes. I can see Jena eyeing him, and make a promise that if we all make it through, I'll try and get them together. We dispose of our old faction clothes, and find new black Dauntless clothing in the drawers. I feel some of the boys eyeing me, so I change quickly into tight black pants, a black tank top, and boots. Jena, Cam, and I head to the dining hall, and find a table. There is a bunch of food I've never eaten before. I glance around the room once, and then turn to Cam and Jena.

"So, tell me about the other transfers from your factions." Cam is filling up his water glass, and he looks toward the table with the other four Candor members.

"Well there's Hazel on the end there, and she's decent. I don't really know her all that well." The girl on the end has dark, rich skin and shoulder-length hair. She looks as if she would rather be sitting somewhere else.

"Then there's Justin, Paige, and Tom. They're practically evil, so I would stay away from them." Justin is short, though still taller than me, but definitely lacking in the muscle-department. He has greasy brown hair. It's clear that he's the weakest link of the three. Paige is big, with short red hair. Big as in very tall and thickset. She looks mean. Tom is nearly as large as Four, and you can tell he knows it, flexing his muscles slightly as he's eating. Unfortunately, he's also good-looking, with dark brown hair and light blue eyes.

"The three boys I came with are all decent. Patrick, Brent, and Felix." Jena points them out to me at the next table over. Patrick is easily the tallest initiate, which makes his red hair stick out that much more. Brent is stocky, with smooth dark skin and a very handsome face. Felix seems to be uncomfortable, looking around the dining hall, taking in everything with his bright green eyes. I take another moment to glance around, and find Eric watching me. He doesn't drop his gaze, and for the first time I notice his cold blue eyes. I shiver, and turn back to my table. I wonder if he's waiting for me to run out of here screaming. I won't fail. I refuse. I chance another glance. He's back to his meal, listening to whatever Four and Tris are saying. Objectively, he's very handsome. His blonde hair is gelled back, allowing his face to be in full focus. His face is very masculine, with just the hint of stubble on his chin. I turn back to the conversation, not wanting him to catch me looking. Hazel, the pretty Candor girl, leaves her table and comes to over to our table.

"Is it alright if I sit here? I can't stand to be around those three." She asks, eyeing the table with the other Candor initiates. We all agree and make room for her. There is a clanking sound and we all turn towards the front of the dining room, where the source of the noise is. Eric stands there with another man and an intimidating woman. She has dark dreads and multiple tattoos. The man has his long blond hair pulled back into a ponytail, but he has a playful light in his eyes. They must be Harrison and Tori, the other Dauntless leaders. Tori is holding a glass high in her hands.

"To our new initiates! Welcome to Dauntless!" Screams fill the air as the Dauntless bang their fists on the tables or hit their glasses with their forks. I can't help but get caught up in the emotion, and Jena, Hazel and I begin to scream while Cam simply smiles widely. I can feel Eric's eyes on me again, but I don't give him the satisfaction of looking. I will prove him wrong. I will be Dauntless.

**Here is a list of the Dauntless transfers, just to keep them straight. We will be meeting some of the initiates soon. Please review, I love reading them! Any suggestions as to what you want to happen are always welcome. Also, I take requests if anyone wants a particular one-shot. I prefer writing Divergent or Harry Potter, but PM me to ask. -Imp**

**Transfers**

Shiloh-Amity

Jena-Erudite

Cam-Candor

Paige-Candor

Justin-Candor

Tom-Candor

Hazel-Candor

Patrick-Erudite

Brent-Erudite

Felix-Erudite


	3. Chapter 3

III

"Wake up! Time to move transfers!" I jolt awake. Four's loud, deep voice seems to echo throughout the whole dorm. Right. First day of training. I know I want to make a good impression, so I dress as quickly as I can. Tight black pants, tighter black shirt, and laced-up boots. Hazel and Jena join me, and we walk quickly to the training center. We are the first transfers there. Four and Tris converse quietly near a few targets. It's not hard to see the bond between them. Tris notices us and gives an approving nod. We stand waiting for the rest of the transfers to join us, conversing about what we will do with our free time later. Hazel wants to get a tattoo later, and Jena wants to go shopping. Every Dauntless gets a certain amount to spend based on their ranking within the faction, even us lowly transfer initiates.

"You have to let me do your makeup, Shiloh." Hazel is insistent. I've never worn makeup, so I'm a little uneasy, but I can't turn down the prospect of having friends here. The rest of the transfers begin to file in. Paige roughly bumps into me as she passes, and I hear Justin and Tom snickering. I do my best to ignore it, but she's much bigger than me. I'm easily the smallest transfer. At least I do have some muscle from working outside in the fields with Cole. My stomach tightens at the thought of Cole. I can't afford to get emotional, so I focus back on Jena and Hazel. Cam joins our circle, and two of the Erudite boys, Brent and Felix, wander over with him.

"Where's Patrick?" Jena inquires, looking around the compound for the large redhead. Felix leans in close to us, an anxious look on his face. He runs his hands through his already-messy brown hair as he answers Jena.

"He left last night. Said he made a big mistake coming here." Brent shakes his head sadly.

"I think he missed his girlfriend. She stayed in Erudite. He's going to try to go back." We all looked at each other, wondering if he would be allowed back in. Before the war, once you left your faction, you could not return. I wasn't sure if the rules had changed. There were nine of us transfers left now.

"Alright initiates, gather around." I can see why Four is a trainer; he could easily deafen a room with his booming voice. We all quickly form a circle around a table that holds a dozen guns. Tris is holding one, and she's so petite it almost looks a bit silly. That's when I remember I'm about the same size as her. No one is going to be afraid of me. Four shows us how to load and unload the gun, and the safety features, before gesturing to Tris.

"Tris will demonstrate. Watch carefully." Tris takes aim at a target, leveling the gun. I'm worried that the recoil is going to throw her backwards. Her finger twitches on the trigger. The sound isn't as loud as I thought it would be. We all stare at the target, which now has a bullet-sized hole in the center. Tris looks a lot more deadly now. Four is staring at her with a proud expression on his face.

"Train hard, and maybe someday you'll be as good as her. And she's only got about a year's worth of training on her." Tris grins, and sets the gun down. One year. That means she's just seventeen. I'm even more impressed now.

"Yeah, and I'm better than Four's three years of training." She teases. It's nice to see the Dauntless aren't as menacing as the other factions think. Three years. So that would make Four nineteen. I also heard that Four and Eric were in the same class together, so Eric would be nineteen as well. Nineteen, and already a Dauntless leader. No wonder people thought the Dauntless were crazy. Four had us each take a gun and find a target. It was then that I noticed Eric standing behind the targets. Of course. I make my way over to a target, trying to ignore the fact that he is right behind me. Focus is crucial. I stand in-between Jena and Cam, who start practicing right away. I wait a moment, wanting to be prepared for the recoil. I don't want to look foolish. I've made my impression by being the first jumper, and I don't want to ruin it. Pulling the trigger, I feel a pulse of excitement rush through my body. This is fun. Though I was ready for the gun to jump back in my hands, I wasn't able to steady it enough. My bullet ended up above the center, but still on the target. I continue trying, hoping for a better result. I get the bullet a little lower, but not anywhere near where I would want it to be. I glance around, and am pleased to see that Paige and Justin are having trouble even hitting the target. I take another shot as Four nears me, and groan in frustration as my bullet hits the same place.

"I can't watch this anymore. Here." A gruff voice sounds behind me, but Four is still just to my side. A pair of tattooed arms reach around my shoulders, though they are practically above my head because of the height difference.

"It's not that difficult, but I guess for a greenie…" Eric mumbles grumpily as he adjusts my grip on the gun. His fingers mold mine to the gun, though they dwarf mine. I hold back my retort, knowing that he is just trying to make my life difficult. If he thinks that would make me fail, then he is going to be surprised. It's just gives me more determination. Four looks at Eric, a confused look on his face. _Probably wondering why Eric is being so antagonizing towards me._ I think. Though he's pretty cruel to all of us. Eric steps back, and I refuse to let myself turn around. Instead, I take another shot, and it hits nearly center. I scowl, and I can swear I hear a chuckle behind me. I want to turn around and hit him, but I know I would never even get my hand up in time. Eric would probably kick me out, or worse, just for trying. Four is still watching Eric curiously, but he shakes his head and claps his hands together.

"Alright, that's enough for today. Put the guns back, you're free to go." I rush out of the training arena, Hazel and Jena behind me. We head to the Pit and discuss the first day of training.

"I'm surprised that Eric helped you, Shiloh. I would've sworn he would rather watch us struggle." Jena comments as we make our way into the tattoo parlor. I wrinkle my nose.

"He just wants to aggravate me as much as possible. Because I'm from Amity, and he thinks I'm weak." They have no reply, because they know I'm probably right. The parlor is lit up with red lights, and its packed with Dauntless. We browse the wall of tattoos. Hazel picks out the Dauntless sign to go on the inside of her wrist.

"I think I'm going to wait a while to get inked. What about you?" Jena asks me. I shrug. I'm undecided. Then I see it. It almost looks like a swirl of vines. It's delicate but tough at the same time. I grab the glass and head over to the nearest available artist. Her name is Lynn.

"Very Dauntless." She says as I hand her the tattoo. I grin. Jena and Hazel, who is now finished with her tattoo, watch as I get the ink from just the tip of my shoulder and into my collarbone. When it's completed, they drag me to a clothing store nearby.

"We've got to make you over into a tough Dauntless girl now!" Jena exclaims. She is excited by all the clothes. Of course, they're all black, but still. Hazel finds me an off-the-shoulder dress that I can show off my new tattoo in. It's shorter and tighter than anything I've ever worn. I'm given a pair of black heels, and they fix my hair and add a few touches of makeup.

"We look like badasses now." Hazel and Jena excitedly twirl in the mirror, both wearing new dresses, while I just stare at my reflection.

"I don't know. Do you think it's maybe too much?" I question anxiously. I've never seen myself like this before. It's an intense look. Jena rolls her eyes at me in the mirror.

"Nooooo it's perfect. You look even hotter now. Come on, everyone is already probably all met up by the Chasm. Let's go." We head back out into the Pit, and find all of the transfers together. I'm a little too close to the Chasm for my liking, but everyone else seems fine. The way Cam is chatting up Jena, I might not even need to do any matchmaking. I try to get into the conversation with Hazel, Brent, and Felix, but I keep getting a weird feeling. Finally, I realize why. All I have to do is look over Felix's shoulder. A little ways down there is a small group congregated, laughing and joking like ours. Tris, Four, Uriah, Marlene, and Tori are all animatedly chatting. But there is one who is not. Eric stands there too, and I swear he is watching me. I can't catch him at it, but I just know. I focus on Felix, and manage to push Eric out of my mind.

**Eric's POV**

I know I shouldn't be watching the transfers, but I can't help myself from glancing over there. What the hell. I'm not watching _the _transfers, I'm watching _a_ transfer. Shiloh. The greenie. It's getting out of hand. I think even Four noticed that something was up in the training room earlier. He definitely noticed that I was acting weird. It's not like I normally help the initiates. They should figure it out themselves. If they can't figure out basic skills, there's no way they can be Dauntless. But there's this different feeling around her. I still thoroughly enjoy annoying the shit out of her, but I can't bring myself to truly be mean. Ever since I first saw her, determined to leap into Dauntless, I haven't been myself. It's fucking messing with my mind. I'm even kind of being nicer to the Stiff. For fucks sake, I haven't made a rude comment to Four in almost an hour.

I sneak another glance at her. She's obviously been given a makeover, though I like both versions. She was pretty in that red dress she wore the first day. Now she's stunning. She looks like she's already been accepted into Dauntless. She's petite, but she's got a few curves in _exactly_ the right places. Her long golden hair is the exact opposite of her silver eyes. There's something so enticing about her face. Her shoulder and collarbone are completely exposed, showing the new tattoo she's gotten. My imagination begins to run wild. I see my hands skimming over her shoulder, pulling off her dress, and I'm kissing her. I'm kissing those delicious lips and pulling her against my hips and— I'm distracted when I realize I'm not the only one watching her. The big initiate from Candor, what's his name. _Tom. _He was pretty good with the gun today. I had taken notice of him immediately, thinking he would make it into Dauntless easily. I clench my teeth. Maybe he _won't _make it in. He's definitely taking Shiloh in. Now I'm imagining a new scenario. I'm beating the Candor asshole to a pulp. Throwing him into the Chasm. _Fuck_. I turn back to the group before I completely lose myself, and I see the Stiff watching me curiously. She looks from me, to Shiloh, and back again, and a satisfied smirk appears on her face.

"See something you like?" Tris taunts. The others immediately look at Tris, then what she's looking at, and then me again. Comprehension dawns on Four's face, and I want to claw his eyes out. Tori grins, catching on. Marlene and Uriah look confused. I want to kill them all right there.

"I _was_ wondering why you've been so…well let me rephrase that. I was wondering why you haven't been a complete ass recently. She _is _quite pretty, isn't she?" Tori's voice is gleeful, and I know she's thoroughly enjoying this. She's still a bit bitter about being second in command to someone much younger than herself. They all turn again to stare at Shiloh, and I groan. That wasn't obvious at all. Fucking idiots.

"You're all fucking idiots." I growl. Four has the most amused look on his face, and I can't take it anymore, so I stalk out of the Pit. They don't know what they're talking about.

**Shiloh's POV**

Even though I'm trying to ignore Eric, I notice when he leaves. I can tell by the way he's walking that he's pissed off. I can also tell by the way Tris, Four, Uriah, Marlene, and Tori are trying to _not_ look over here means that they just were. Great. Eric was probably trying to convince them that I'm not going to make it here in Dauntless. I bite my lip. He _is_ the main leader of Dauntless. What he says goes. A terrible thought runs through my head. _What if he knows I'm Divergent? _I know that technically, the factions aren't allowed to discriminate against the Divergents. But still, this is Dauntless. Out of all the factions, Dauntless would skirt the rules. A Dauntless leader might want to make sure a Divergent doesn't get in.

I try and calm myself. There is no way he could possibly have found out about my test results. After the war, the test results are immediately destroyed after they are administered. My heart slows. He can't know. He's just bitter that a _greenie_ was the first jumper into his precious Dauntless. It's just some old rivalry coming out. I just have to show him that I am Dauntless. Four said that tomorrow we will start learning hand-to-hand combat. I'll have to show them all that just because I'm little doesn't mean I'm not capable.

It starts to get late, and we all decide to head back to the dorm. Who knows what time we'll be awoken in the morning. I change and climb into bed. Tomorrow, I will show them.


	4. Chapter 4

_Thank you so much for the reviews and follows! I have some questions at the end, so please read them and leave me an answer in a review if you want! Also, I'm going back and editing/adding to the previous chapters. Nothing big, but just refining them a bit._

IV

When I wake up in the morning, the rest of the transfers are still asleep. Four hasn't come in to bring us to training yet. I figure I'll take the opportunity to use the bathroom while it's empty. The bathroom here is just a large, open space, with dingy showers. Everything is out in the open, and even though I'm not from Abnegation, I'm still getting used to it. Amity enjoys privacy too, just not as rigidly as Abnegation. I pull on the standard black uniform, admiring my new tattoo. I'll be needing to buy some shirts that come off the shoulder to better show it off. I line my eyes with the new eyeliner Jena made me buy, though not as heavily as she did. The black really displays the grey in my eyes. Since we're going to be fighting today, I pull my hair back into a ponytail, leaving a few pieces around my face free. As I turn to head back to the room, I find my path blocked. Tom, the large, handsome initiate from Candor, stands in the doorway, a passive expression on his face. Being this close to him, I realize just how muscular he is. The bands on his arms stretch his shirt. I hope I don't have to fight him during training today. I try to side-step him, but he steps with me, a slight smirk coming across his face. An uneasy feeling washes over me. No one else has woken up yet, but they sleep close by. I can't imagine Tom would try anything with the chance of waking everyone. He's not dumb. This is purely an attempt at intimidation. I need to conceal my fear, and show him that I'm not an easy target. I need to be Dauntless. Mustering courage from deep inside of myself, I step right up to him, raising my chin. I urge my voice to be commanding.

"Move." Tom blinks, a slight grimace crossing over his face. He was expecting me to be timid, afraid of him. I stand with my arms crossed, trying to look as if I'm not nearly a foot shorter than him. Jena is shifting under the covers, and I will her to wake up. I need a distraction. Tom doesn't seem as if he's going to move; he's staring at me now with a hungry discontent. I quickly assess my options. I could make a fuss and wake everyone up, but that seems cowardly. I'm about to try and shove my way through him, which I'm sure won't end well, when the lights in the room are switched on. Four paces into the room, clamoring for everyone to get out of bed. He stops, his eyes assessing the odd stance that Tom and I have taken in the doorway. We must look strange, like we're in a staring contest. Tom gives me one last look before walking past me deeper into the bathroom. I let out a long breath, my hands shaking a bit. Jena and Hazel are now conscious, pulling on their training clothes. I sit back down on my bed, waiting for them to finish dressing.

"Do you think we're going to fight each other today?" I question, pulling on my lace-up boots. I've been wearing them so much, the leather is starting to soften and mold to my feet. Jena is tying her dark hair into a high ponytail. She's got amazingly high cheekbones.

"We haven't even learned any fighting techniques yet. How could they expect us to fight until we've mastered the techniques?" She replies, tugging on her hair. Hazel and I both give her the same incredulous look, wondering where she thinks she is. She laughs at our expressions, conceding.

"Yeah okay okay." I grin at Hazel. I hope I don't have to fight either of them today. I know I will have to eventually, and I'm not looking forward to it. Something tells me that Dauntless doesn't care about friendship in the fighting arena. Tom eyeballs me as he heads out the door, Justin and Paige trailing him like two lapdogs. Paige notices, and gives me a hostile look. Great. She probably outweighs me by 60 pounds. I'm not looking forward to _that_ fight either. I shudder.

"What was that about?" I'm snapped out of the violent daydream of Paige beating me to a bloody pulp by Hazel's voice. I've noticed that she's extremely cognizant. Nothing escapes her sharp eyes, and I wonder if she would have been better off in Erudite. Perhaps Dauntless and Erudite share some similar traits. Hazel is looking at me a bit anxiously. I shrug. I'm not ready to confide to anyone about Tom yet, not until I understand what his problem is. As far as I know, he's simply trying to intimidate me. Before Hazel can question me further, Brent throws her over his shoulder and starts running down the halls with her. We laugh as echoes of Hazel's yelling reach back to the dorm. Cam and Felix join Jena and I as we head down to the training center. Felix seems to have settled in better now, even seeming relaxed as he joins in our conversation. We pass by the Pit, which is beginning to brim with life in the early hours. There's also new construction past the Pit, a place for the elder Dauntless to live. They used to have to leave when Max was in charge, when they were no longer strong and able to fight, but the leaders recently overturned that rule. Even though Dauntless doesn't get much sunlight, it's still surprisingly beautiful. I could see myself living here forever, calling it home. If I can just pass initiation.

We reach the training center last, but thankfully we are not late. I can't imagine what would happen to us if we arrived late for training. I'm disgruntled to see that Eric is already here, standing with Tris and Four. As a Dauntless leader, doesn't he have anything better to do? Four waits until we are all circled around him. Even though Eric is here, Four seems to be in charge of our training, though I bet if Eric really wanted something done, it would happen. There seems to be an uneasy alliance between the two, bordering on competitiveness. Four's wearing a tight black shirt today, and I see the edges of tattoos on his neck. Tris is a lucky girl.

"Alright. Today we are going to start with hand-to-hand combat training. This is one of the most important physical skills you will learn, so I suggest you keep your mouths shut and pay attention. Since there are nine of you, we're going to split you up into three groups to start, one for each of us." He gestures to himself, Tris, and Eric. I look at Jena excitedly. Maybe Tris can help me figure out a way to fight despite my size. Tris is dressed similarly to us initiates, her hair pulled back like mine. I wish I could sit and talk to her, ask her how she survived her initiation as a smaller girl. Four looks around at us, mentally dividing us in his mind. I cross my fingers.

"Tom, Brent, and Jena come with me. Cam, Hazel, and Paige with Tris. Eric can take Justin, Felix, and Shiloh." I swear I hear Eric grit his teeth together, but I'm too scared to look. My whole body deflates. The groups start to separate, and I glance at Four. He's looking at Eric, and I swear his eyes are twinkling. Well, at least it makes sense. Four must know Eric can't stand me, and wants to aggravate him. At_ my_ expense. I have some choice words for Four, but nothing I can say if I want to be made Dauntless. I walk behind Felix and Justin as they follow Eric to a corner. At least I'm not in a group with Tom or Paige. There are a few punching bags set up in this corner, along with a bunch of weights. Eric turns around abruptly, and I smack into Felix's back. Justin covers his laugh with a cough, and suddenly I'm ready to start fighting. Felix takes a firm grip on my arm so I don't fall, and I smile appreciatively at him. Eric glowers at Felix, who quickly lets go. _Yeah Felix, next time just let me fall._ I think. _No helping the weaklings in Dauntless._ Eric starts the lesson, though he's staring more at the wall behind us than us. I listen, hoping to absorb as much information as possible. Regardless of how I feel about him, I know that Eric knows how to fight. He's easily the strongest Dauntless, and makes Tom look like a slouch. His icy eyes slide over to mine as he's speaking.

"Don't forget to find your opponents weakness. You can exploit a stronger opponent if you can figure out where he is weak." This advice is probably the most useful for me. Every opponent is going to be stronger than me, just because they weigh more. Eric directs us to the punching bags, where we practice the moves he explained to us. The first hit I make barely moves the bag. I think about how Eric told us to stand, and focus on correcting my posture. I tense my stomach, striking again and again. Eric comes to stand by me, watching. I wait for the insult.

"More from the core." He instructs, his voice surprisingly neutral. I almost stop, because I'm surprised that he hasn't insulted my strength. But stopping would be a big mistake, so I continue working, trying to let my core engage. Eric doesn't say anything else, so I figure I must not be completely terrible. That or he's running out of insults. I hold in my laughter as I hear him tear Justin apart. A loud whistle sounds from the center of the training floor. I stop, wiping the sweat that's gathered on my forehead.

"Initiates, take a break for a minute while we match some of you up." Felix and I head back over with everyone else. Tris, Four, and Eric stand behind a blackboard, whispering and looking around the room, stopping to write a name down every few seconds. I know I'll have to fight everyone at least once, something they had already explained, but I hope I don't have to fight Paige or Tom today. Eric claps his hands together.

"Alright transfers. Here's the board for today. The new rules that Four has established for this year say that once you are down for more than three seconds, you're out." Eric doesn't look particularly thrilled about this rule, but I'm guessing he's decided to pick and choose his battles with Four. He continues.

"One of you will have to sit during each round, since there are nine of you. Tom, you're sitting the first round today." Tom looks furious, and I wonder if Eric is punishing him for something. Tom would want to fight everyday if he could, I'm sure. The cold look Eric gives Tom confirms my gut feeling. I can't imagine why he's being punished; I would have thought Tom would be Eric's favorite due to his malice and strength. Tris turns the board over.

Hazel vs. Paige

Brent vs. Cam

Felix vs. Jena

Shiloh vs. Justin

Upon seeing the board, I instantly feel bad for Hazel. She's not nearly as small as me, but Paige is monstrous. Brent and Cam will be fairly even. Felix looks disconcerted, and I know he doesn't want to fight a girl. I'm actually quite pleased with my position. Justin is the best opponent I could hope for. He moves awkwardly and has almost no muscle, so if I'm quick enough, I might have a chance. I figure that Four or Tris must have taken pity on me for my first fight. Probably Tris, since she knows what it's like. Four leads us to a small raised ring. Hazel and Paige step up onto the platform, and I feel like I might be sick. At first, it looks like Hazel might hold her own. Paige lumbers around the ring, and Hazel is quick on her feet. But then, Paige gets in a hard throw to Hazel's head, and she's down. She's down for more than three seconds, and at first I'm worried she's unconscious. But she makes a move to stand, and we help her to the side. She's a bit dizzy, but she'll be fine. I sit next to her, holding an ice-pack to her head as Brent and Cam circle each other. It's a long fight, as I expected. Brent manages to kick out Cam's leg, and he's stunned down, unable to stand. Brent helps him back up, an almost sheepish look on his face, and Cam regains his leg strength to sit with Hazel.

"Sorry man." Brent whispers, low enough so that our trainers won't hear. Cam smiles through a grimace.

"You had to. Hopefully they'll take in to account that it was a good fight." Cam's now watching the ring a bit disquietly as Jena and Felix begin their fight. It's instantly obvious that Felix does not want to hit her. But no one wants to be factionless, so it's not like he can just fall over and concede. He manages to knock her over by hitting her stomach, and she loses her breath for a minute. It's long enough that he wins, but I can see that Four and Eric aren't convinced. Tris has a slight smile on her face though. They let it go for now, and suddenly it's my turn.

"Go Shiloh!" Felix and Hazel are cheering for me, and it feels like they've given me a lightness. I remove my shoes, stepping into the ring. I can see Tris watching intently, and I wonder if she's aligned herself with me. Justin's face look like he's already won. I center myself, focusing on him, and letting everything outside of the ring go. Justin's movements are wooden, and I easily maneuver around his hands. Eric's words come back to me. I need to exploit Justin's weaknesses. For starters, he moves slowly and is uncoordinated. I do some quick steps around him, and throw a quick three punches to his stomach. I know I don't throw the strongest punch, but thankfully he's soft in the stomach. He gasps, and before he can recover, I jab my elbow his neck, pushing him over. A swift kick to his stomach ensures that he's down. My cheering squad explodes. Paige and Tom look murderous. I step out of the ring with my boots in hand, taking a glimpse at Tris. She gives me a subtle grin. Hazel hugs me as I reach her, now fully recovered but with a lovely bruise covering her cheek. Four waits for us to settle before speaking.

"Decent first fights, initiates. Go have lunch, and be back here for the second round of the day in an hour." He must be feeling generous if he's giving us a full hour for break. As we walk out of the training center, Cam limping slightly, I gaze over my shoulder. Eric's staring at the board, figuring out the second round of fighting. Hopefully I've changed his mind a little.

….

"Come on greenie, that's pathetic." I'm facing Jena in round two, and Eric's back to insulting me. I shouldn't be surprised. We've been fighting for a few minutes, getting in a few jabs here and there. Jena kicks my feet out from underneath me, and I land hard on my back, losing my breath. She helps me back up, and I avoid Eric's gaze. Even though I've lost, I mustn't look weak.

We go to sit with Felix, who now has a bruised face and stomach, courtesy of Tom. That was painful to watch. Tom was fired up from sitting down in the first round, and Felix just didn't have a chance. Tom fought to hurt, not just to win. They let Cam sit out this round, and he's stretching out his leg. Brent has already beaten Hazel, which was almost just as painful as watching Tom fight Felix. He's been whispering apologies to her nonstop while she assures him that she isn't mad. We watch as Paige attacks Justin, and I almost feel bad for him, getting beat by girls two times in a row. _Almost _being the key word.

Four dismisses us for the evening. We head to the dining hall, a bit slower than usual, and find that the Dauntless-born initiates are already sitting. Most of them usually ignore us, but at lunch a few started talking to us, asking how the training was going. One of them, a boy named Pierce, calls us over to his table.

"Hey greenie." He says playfully, moving over so that I can sit next to him. Apparently, he's Uriah's cousin, and I can see the resemblance. He's got a handsome face with bronze-tanned skin. There's another boy who reminds me of my brother, named Sam, whose blonde hair is nearly as light as mine. They sit with a pretty redheaded girl, Natasha.

"How'd the fighting go?" Sam asks, eyeing Felix's bruised face. We are interrupted by a pair of Dauntless, named Christina and Will. Tris's friends. Will has his arm slung over Christina's shoulders. It seems like Tris and Four are the only couple in Dauntless who didn't get together during their initiation.

"Pierce, Uri told me you won both of your fights today." Christina says, smiling. Will slaps him on the back, and Pierce looks proud of himself. They continue on their way.

"Guess _your_ fighting went well." I tease as I cut my hamburger into tiny pieces. I'm still not completely used to the taste.

"It's already dead greenie, no need to insult it." A cutting voice sounds behind me, and I don't need to turn around to know who it is. I turn to glare at Eric, but he's already made his way to the trainer's table. I roll my eyes in irritation at Hazel, who grins. I notice Natasha is eyeing the small space between Pierce and I's shoulders, and I ever so slightly move the opposite way.

I manage to eat most of my hamburger by sheer will, knowing that the protein will be important if I want to continue gaining strength. Eventually, I'll have to fight Tom and Paige.

**A few thoughts. First, do you guys like the length of the chapters? I could make them longer, but I usually like to focus on one or two chunks of time per chapter. Do you want more POV sections from Eric? Also, give me some suggestions for Shiloh's fear landscape. We still have plenty of chapters to go until then, but I would like to use some reader ideas. Please review, I love reading them! :)**

**-Imp**


	5. Chapter 5

_Thank you for all the support so_ far!

V

**Eric's POV**

I'm a little late for my morning workout, and I probably won't be able to get in a full sixty minutes before the initiates arrive. I've recently been doubling my regimen, coming to train in the morning, night, and sometimes in between. It's the only time my mind can stay busy enough to not be thinking of _her _every ten seconds. Plus, I'm good at it. After the first phase of our initiation, I was ahead of Four. It was only after the mental phase that he passed me. Fucking idiot. It's hard to beat someone who only has four fears, no matter how quick you are at getting through your own fear landscape.

I haven't been back through my fear landscape in a few months, but I doubt it's changed. I only had six fears, which any other year would have been unheard of. For a while, I really hated Four. First he took the top ranking away from me, and then he had the audacity to turn down a leadership position. That part bode well for me, but I never understood it. It made me resent the asshole more. Only after the war did we begin to ease up on the animosity. I had to step up as the Dauntless leader.

I start my routine as usual, running a mile around the center. Then I start on the punching bag, letting myself zone out. It's a relief to escape from my mind for a while. _Thwack. Thwack. Thwack. _I imagine the bag is Tom, and my throws get more aggressive. If I can figure out a way of getting him out of Dauntless without it being suspicious, I will. Just thinking about the asshole is getting my temper dangerously close to the breaking point, so I go back to just zoning out. I stay at the bag for another twenty minutes before turning to the weights.

I've got to stack nearly everything there is onto one bar in order to make it somewhat challenging. Still, it's not that difficult. I might go back to climbing again. At least that gives me an adrenaline rush. The problem is, I used to climb with Harrison, but he's busy most days checking on the Dauntless who have fence duty. Tori annoys the shit out of me, so that's a no-go. But it's not something you should do by yourself.

After a while, the Stiff walks in and begins setting up the punching bags and weights for the initiates. It's always amusing to watch her try and drag bags that weigh as much as her. I could help her, but she wanted the training job. That includes everything that comes with it. Today the initiates are going to learn some more in-depth fighting techniques. We give them a day in-between fighting days. Or I guess, Four and Tris give them a day in between. If it was up to me, they would fight everyday. Right now, I'm just letting Four have his way. I've got more important things on my mind. Certain blonde things.

The Stiff eyes me as she finishes setting up, but she knows better than to interrupt me. If she's here, that means that Four is waking up the transfers, and they'll be here shortly. _Fuck_. I definitely didn't get in a full hour. I'm about to set down my weights when I have an idea. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad for the initiates to arrive while I'm still lifting. It should intimidate Tom so he'll know better than to cross me, if he doesn't already. More importantly, maybe it wouldn't be so bad if Shiloh saw. It's complete vanity, and the Abnegation would cringe, but I can't resist.

I turn to face the wall, listening carefully for the sound of voices while keeping up with my lifting. The initiates begin to arrive, chattering away. I can't hear Shiloh's voice among them, so she's either not here yet or silent. I know that I can't keep lifting while they are here for too long without looking strange, so I set the weights down carefully. Casually, I wipe my face on the sleeve of my shirt, effectively looking behind me and over my shoulder. I can see Shiloh standing with her usual group, but she's not in the conversation. She's definitely looking my way. I try not to let it go to my head. Four and Tris have gathered together now, so I make my way to them. I glance again at Shiloh to find her fully engaged in conversation with the Erudite girl. Four gets the initiate's attention.

"Listen up initiates. Today you're going to be learning some new moves to use in hand-to-hand combat, as well as practicing what you've already learned. Tomorrow you'll fight again." One of the Erudite boys, the one who got pummeled by Tom yesterday, looks relieved that they're will be no fighting. His face is still badly bruised.

"Let's change up the groups. Tom, Justin, and Hazel, with me. Shiloh, Brent, and Paige go with Tris. Jena, Felix, and Cam can work with Eric." Four continues. I wonder if Four has sensed my tension towards Tom, and is keeping him away from me. I'll give him credit, he's pretty smart to keep that little shit away from me. My group follows me a little warily to the corner of the room. After showing them some basic moves, I set them free on the punching bags. I walk around them under the pretense of giving them corrections, but really I'm trying not to be obvious as I watch Shiloh work with the Stiff. I find myself appreciating Tris for the first time, because she can probably teach Shiloh how to overcome her size. And I need her to do that, or she won't become Dauntless, and whatever I'm feeling and wanting will be meaningless.

**Shiloh's POV**

I'm so happy to be working with Tris today. I feel like I've been waiting for this forever. I bounce excitedly on the toes of my boots. Unfortunately, Paige is in our group, and she's already given me a few thousand dirty looks. I wish I could explain to her that I want absolutely nothing to do with Tom. Actually, I'd prefer if he'd leave me alone. All I'm focused on right now is making it through initiation. I turn my focus back to Tris.

"First things first. If you want to build your strength up, you're going to want to do some weight training. You have to figure out the right balance of cardio and strength training." Tris is showing us some basic sets with the weights, and my mind unwillingly flashes back to the sight that met me when I entered the training center today. I wasn't sure how much Eric had been lifting, but it looked like _a lot. _More than humanly possible, but it looked simple for him. Despite everything else, it was hard not to notice, hard not to admire. It had looked like the tattoos on his arms were going to pop off. I shake my head. _Focus._ I start working with the weights, though it's a pitiful amount. Brent seems to be lifting his body weight. Paige doesn't have as much as Brent, but she's not far behind. She makes faces as she's lifting, and it's hard not to laugh at them.

Tris switches us over to the punching bags. I find the smallest one, and get my posture correct first. I focus on hitting accurately, trying to ignore the sight of Paige attacking her bag, because it's making me a little sick.

"I beat someone her size during my initiation." There's a breathy whisper in my ear. Tris stands next to me, watching Paige. This is the first time we've been right next to each other. She is almost exactly the same height as me. I notice the fierceness in her eyes, and hope that I can look like that someday. I stop punching for a minute, and turn to Tris.

"How?" I ask, abandoning any pretense. Tris pretends to be readjusting my punching bag as she speaks.

"I used my shoulders, elbows, everything I could. I trained extra at night. But mostly, I got angry. Sometimes you've got to get a little angry." She walks away to check on Brent. I think about what she's said, and turn back to my punching bag, more determined than ever. I bet I could come in here at night and train, during our free hours. I need every extra minute. Dedication has got to count for something in Dauntless.

"Initiates, come back over to the board." Four calls out. He's standing near the blackboard in the center of the floor. The sound of fists hitting against the puffy bags ceases. I walk over to stand with Hazel, breathing heavily. Felix looks exhausted, and I'm sure it's because of the beating he took yesterday. Four waits until we've all gathered.

"I have your preliminary rankings. Remember, you can still move up quite a bit before we make cuts. Or you could move down. This is just a guideline for you, to see how you're doing." Eric is staring at Four, a bit of a glower on his face. I'm willing to bet he didn't know Four was ranking us yet, and he hadn't gotten a say. At least that might mean I'm not last, if Eric didn't have anything to do with these rankings. Four flips over the board, and it feels like my stomach is doing flips as well.

1. Tom

2. Brent

3. Paige

4. Cam

5. Jena

6. Hazel

7. Shiloh

8. Felix

9. Justin

I'm shocked that I'm that high. Beating Justin and being the first jumper must've counted for something. Tom has a smug smirk on his face, and I really wish I could hit him. Felix looks dismayed, and my heart breaks for him. Losing to Tom so badly, and his unwillingness to fight Jena surely counted against him. He still can move up though. Of course, if he moves up, I might be the one to move down.

"Keep working." Four instructs, before dismissing us to dinner. I'm relieved, but I can tell Felix is upset. He doesn't speak as we leave the training center, simply staring at the passing walls. We arrive at the dining hall, where Pierce, Sam, and Natasha already sit. I notice that Natasha sits close next to Pierce today, and smile to myself.

"Did you guys get your rankings today?" Sam inquires as I wedge myself next to him. Pierce is stuffing a few pounds of hamburger meat into his mouth while Natasha watches in horror. I add one patty to my plate, and resolve to not cut it so small today.

"Yeah." Felix answers, his face falling. Clearly not a subject that he wants to talk about right now. His green eyes have lost any brightness they had. I nudge him with my shoulder.

"Felix, cheer up. You can still move up. And you don't know how the Dauntless-born are ranked." He just shrugs his shoulders at me.

"We have some real idiots Felix. You'll be fine." Natasha states, smiling at him. I notice the smattering of freckles across her nose. He sits up a bit more, and takes some food. I think he'll be okay for now.

"So I take it you guys got your rankings too?" Jena asks Sam, since Pierce is still indisposed with hamburger. Hearing Jena, he swallows a massive amount of food and gasps.

"Yeah we did! Guess who's number one?" Natasha rolls her eyes, and Sam just shakes his head.

"Just wait until we get to fight." Sam promises, cracking his knuckles. I grin. Pierce throws his hands up in the air wildly.

"Oh you're on you pansycake." Us transfers look at him confusedly, while Natasha puts her face in her hands. Sam places his hands on the table, leaning forward a bit. He has a serious look on his face.

"Pierce, we've been over this. Pansycake is not cool. No matter how much Uriah wants to bring it back, it's not coming back. I forbid you to use it again. For Natasha's sake." We laugh, while Pierce looks slightly abashed. Natasha throws Sam a grateful smile. I'm finished with my dinner before everyone else, and decide to try and get a shower in before the dorm fills up again. I push myself out of the table, and smack right into what feels like a brick wall. A large pair of hands grasp my shoulders, keeping me from falling. I look up into a pair of cold blue eyes. Great.

"Sorry." I say, hoping I'm not about to get reamed out. Eric drops his hands from my shoulders quickly, like he's afraid of catching a disease. He simply grunts in reply, and pushes past me. I walk fast out of the dining hall and back to the dorm.

I'm already showered and dressed for bed when everyone else gets back. The boys head straight for the shower, while Jena and Hazel come to sit on my bed. Once the boys are out of earshot, Jena leans forward, a pink tinge in her cheeks.

"Guys, I think I really like Cam." I smile, and Hazel giggles. It's nice to just feel like girls for a minute. We discuss all of Cam's good qualities for a little bit, before moving on to Brent and Hazel.

"And his smile. Oh, I could just die." Hazel is saying, a large, silly grin on her face. Jena turns to me, her dark hair falling across her eyes.

"Shiloh, I saw Sam looking at you during dinner." She confides, a sly smile on her face. I raise up my hand, stopping her.

"No no. I mean, Sam's nice and all, but he looks waaaaay to much like my brother. That would just be weird." They laugh. The boys are emerging from the showers now, and Jena and Hazel jump up to take their place. I ignore Tom, Paige, and Justin as they parade into the room. With them comes a stale scent, and I realize they've been drinking. Or at least Justin and Tom have, Paige seems to be normal. Justin immediately crashes on his bed, face first, and I can hear Cam and Felix snickering. I want to laugh too, but Tom has stopped in front of my bed, his eyes not completely focused. I can smell the alcohol from here, and I wish Four or Tris or even Eric would come to do a night check. I don't know what the drinking age is in Dauntless, but I'm betting they wouldn't be too happy regardless. Tom grabs hold of my wrist, twisting me up towards him.

"Let go." I growl. His hand is crushing around my wrist, and I swear he's going to break it. Cam, Brent, and Felix start heading over towards me quickly, and Tom drops my hand when he sees them. Even drunk, he's not completely stupid. He rolls into his bed, and I rub my wrist. It's already tender. Felix sits down.

"Are you okay?" He asks, his eyes flickering around the whole room. I nod, smiling. I must not show weakness. We all begin to settle down for bed.

A few hours later, we are rattled awake by the lights abruptly turning on and the sound of screaming in the hallway.

**Please leave some reviews! It makes me sad when I don't have any to read. Thank you to all of you who have followed, reviewed, favorited, or just read this so far! I'm always open to suggestions. **

**-Imp**


	6. Chapter 6

VI

_Just wanted to give a quick shout-out to everyone who has reviewed, favorited, or followed: Bronte, Lady Nyght, Okkkbye, Lila, Akage987, EffyinNeverland, Lyonsclaws, Maria-Evelyn, MyLittleDarkAngel, RecalcitrantRach, Sarasva, WhisperedxNothingsx, Wolffy1, ally leigh, Opal and Onyx Lightning, PANDAfiiED, Ranibow2malfoy, Raya3113, sahmy22, Alecks13, Thalia5634, DawnDream and shoelover4145. If I missed your name, apologies. :D And thank you to all of the 185 visitors so far!_

At first when I hear the screaming, I think that something has gone wrong. I can see the Dauntless-born running down the hallway through the open door. Four, Tris, and Eric stand in the doorway, arms crossed, waiting for us to get up. My eyes are still adjusting to the sudden light, but I quickly push myself out of bed. Tom and Justin are slow to get up, getting stuck in their sheets and stumbling a bit. Tom is wincing and rubbing his temple, and I have the urge to scream loudly in his ear. I notice that the trainers are all wearing training clothes rather than anything for nighttime, but they don't look worried or anxious. They look excited. Tris flicks the lights on and off a few times to get our attention.

"Let's go initiates. You have five minutes to get dressed and make it to the train. We're playing capture the flag, Dauntless style." I sigh a breath of relief. No war or danger. Simply a game to be played at midnight. I hear Felix mutter, "Figures" under his breath as he shrugs on a black shirt. We all kick it into high-gear, getting dressed at record speed, though Tom and Justin seem to be struggling with finding the correct way for their clothes to go. Paige has to help Justin find the arms of his shirt, and I choke back my laughter. I don't have time to pick and choose, simply grabbing a black tank top to go over my pants.

Once we are dressed, I link arms with Felix and Jena, and we run yelling down the hallway, Cam, Brent, and Hazel at our heels. We follow the Dauntless-born up a few flights of stairs, and make our way to the outside of Dauntless. Otherwise known as the other way to get into Dauntless if you don't feel like jumping off a building into a net. The train is paused there, but steam pours out of the top, suggesting that it will begin moving again at any moment. We climb up into the end car, where the Dauntless-born have already congregated. I find my way over to where Sam, Pierce, and Natasha are standing. Pierce is dancing on his toes. Uriah, one of the Dauntless-born trainers and Tris's friends, is handing out paintball guns. He hands me one with a roll of paintballs. The train lurches underneath us, and we head towards the outer edges of the city. Four waits until we've all gotten our guns before speaking.

"Initiates. This is a Dauntless tradition. We will divide into two teams, and hide the flag. If you get hit with a paintball, you're out. First team to capture the other team's flag is the winner. Tris and I are captains, and Eric and Uriah are captains of the other team. To make things more interesting, we're going to pick the team for the opposing captains, one by one." I glance at Sam, who looks bewildered. With that strategy, a captain would want to try and pick the weakest initiates for the other team. The strongest will be left for last. I shift my weight to my right foot, biting my lip. Tris stands against the wall of the train, a wistful expression on her face. I wonder if her team won during her initiation. Four gestures to Eric, giving him the first choice. Eric glances around the car with his hostile eyes. Looking for the biggest burden. A smirk lights up his face as he turns back to Four.

"You can have Justin." He says, the laughter evident in his voice. Jena stifles a giggle from behind me, and I step on her foot. Four's handsome face is emotionless as Justin sulks over to stand with him and Tris. His eyes are still slightly glazed over. Eric tilts his head slightly to the side, like he's amused by this whole situation, and waits for Four to make his decision. Four smiles. Unlike Eric, Four doesn't look around the train compartment. He knows exactly who he's picking. My chest tightens as I remember the first day of fighting, when he made the groups. Surely Four wouldn't—

"Eric, you can have Shiloh." Four's voice is regular, but I see Tris biting her lip in a smile. I'm both surprised and not at the same time. I know I'm not the second weakest initiate here, because there are Dauntless-born who are weaker than I. Technically Felix is even rated lower than me right now. This is purely another round in Four and Eric's war. Point for Four. Eric's jaw is clenched as I make my way over to him and Uriah. I stand slightly behind Eric's right shoulder, keeping my chin up as Uriah gives me a smile. I will not sulk like Justin. I can't see Eric's face, but he doesn't look around the train this time before making his pick.

"Tom." He spits out, the enmity not entirely concealed in his voice. Everyone looks around in surprise. We all know Tom is not one of the weak ones. He and Pierce are, without question, the top two initiates. Four's lips twitch slightly as Tom makes his way over to join Justin. Though he's still hungover, you can sense the anger radiating off of him, as Eric has just implied that he is weak. If it were anyone else other than Eric, I'd be worried for them. But something tells me he can handle Tom.

A few Dauntless-born are chosen before Felix is sent to our team. He comes to stand next to me, clearly happy that he wasn't as low as his earlier ranking. Eric sends Natasha to Four's team, before Hazel is sent to us. Jena, Cam, and Paige all end up on Four's team, while Sam comes with us. Jena shoots Hazel and I a sad look. She's with Cam, but separated from the rest of us. The rest of the Dauntless-born have been chosen as well. Brent and Pierce are finally the last two standing. Eric sends Brent to Four's team, effectively choosing Pierce for our team. Hazel frowns next to me. Pierce happily heads over to join his cousin, who gives him a high-five. Tris hands out a glowing flag to each team.

"Eric and Uriah, your team can jump first." Four offers, pulling open the train compartment door. The train is taking a turn, slowing down a bit. Uriah runs screaming, launching himself from the train door. Pierce isn't far behind. I follow after Sam, and we land rolling in a grassy area. Uriah seems to have taken charge now, as Eric makes no protest when he begins to lead us. We're in one of the old parks. The roots of the trees have begun to crack through the concrete sidewalks, the grass is hugely overgrown, and the structures all sit rusted through. Uriah stops at an old stone fountain, though there is no longer water in it. It's merely a large stone circle with a deep basin. Eric sits on the edge of the walls to observe us, crossing his arms. Uriah hands the flag to Pierce as he addresses us.

"It's up to you initiates to come up with a strategy. Eric and I will go along with what you say." Eric clears his throat, but doesn't make any remarks. A few whispers go through the crowd as we discuss the best plan of action. Hazel and Felix want to set up a defensive position around the fountain, and wait for the other team to come to us. They argue that defense is the most effective tactic. Pierce is all for going on the complete offensive, leaving our flag in a good hiding spot and hoping no one finds it. After a while, Sam steps forward.

"I think we should make a compromise. Most of us should go looking for the other team's flag. We leave either Eric or Uriah here with our flag, since they know this area the best. We also leave someone light and speedy here, just in case they need to make a quick getaway with our flag." There are murmurs of assent. At this point, Uriah is practically levitating out of his shoes, so it's quite obvious he's not going to want to stay. He throws Eric a pleading look. Eric rolls his eyes, but shrugs, taking the flag from Pierce. Sam nods, standing a bit taller now that we seem to be going with his plan.

"Okay, and now we need to figure out who's the smallest and speediest…" Without pause, they all turn to look at me. It's no secret who the littlest initiate is. I want to refuse, but I don't want to let them down. Plus, most of the Dauntless-born have no idea how much Eric can't stand me. If I refused to stay, it would be obvious why. That doesn't need to be broadcast around.

"I'll stay." I volunteer so that they don't have to go through the awkwardness of nominating me. My voice is surprisingly firm. Felix and Hazel have looks of uncertainty on their faces, but I simply shake my head at them. I can take care of myself from the big, bad, scary Eric. The rest of the group splits into two. Pierce and Uriah are unable to stay still anymore, and they explode away from the fountain. Hazel shoots me one last glance before running after the others. Sam waits a moment, handing me an extra roll of paintballs.

"Just in case." He says, giving me a firm hug, before sprinting away. I watch him run away until I can't see anymore. Eric makes a choking sound from behind me when Sam is out of earshot.

"You two look a little too much alike, if you ask me." His voice is scathing. I wheel around, glad that it's so dark outside, because my face is flushed. Eric leans against the fountain, the flag in his hands. His eyes are assessing my face.

"We're not together at all. He looks exactly like my brother. Not that anyone _did _ask you." I mutter, willing myself to not look down. Eric grins at my irritation, which was clearly his mission. I roll my eyes, flipping my hair to one side. I sling my gun across my chest, and walk over to him, snatching the flag out of his hands.

"And I'll take this, since I _am_ the designated light and speedy one." Sometimes I wonder if I have a death wish. However, Eric makes no reply, simply laying back onto the edge of the fountain, staring up into the sky. The moon hovers above us, giving off just enough light so that I can see the glint of his eyes. I sit down, keeping my eyes wide open and on the lookout.

"See anything interesting?" Eric asks, a hint of sarcasm in his voice. His eyes are closed now, and he looks like he could take a nap. I want to shoot him with a paintball.

"Not yet. You're the one who should be keeping watch. You're _supposed_ to be protecting the flag, after all." I can't keep the exasperation out of my voice. It's going to get me in trouble. He sits up, the muscles in his arms visible even in the dim light.

"Are you always this cheerful? Or just when you haven't gotten your beauty sleep?" He questions as he checks his supply of paintballs. I _really _want to shoot him with a paintball. I pull my legs to my chest.

"Only when I'm with you." I answer, a faux sweetness entering my voice. I'm suddenly grabbed by the waist and pulled into the basin of the fountain. That's going to hurt in the morning, if it isn't technically morning already. Eric's hand is cupped over my mouth. I resist the urge to bite his hand. He puts a finger to his lips and releases me. I glare at him. He'd better have a good explanation.

"They're here. We'll need to shoot from over the wall of the fountain. If I'm hit, you better pray you're the fastest runner here. I'm not losing this year." His voice is a piercing growl that echoes around me, his eyes blazing with adrenaline. I incline my head to show that I understand. We peek over the edge of the fountain, leveling our guns on the wall. His shoulders are grazing mine, but he makes no attempt to move. I'm not going to; I can use him to help keep myself steady. My eyes search the park in front of us. I can now see a bunch of figures making their way through the darkness. They must have decided to go nearly on an all-out offensive attack. The group hasn't seen us. Yet. There's a sudden shout, and I recognize Brent's voice.

"There! In the fountain!" I watch as they begin scrambling towards us. Eric's eyes are locked in, but he waits for the right opportunity. When they're close enough, we open fire. I feel bad when I hit Jena in the leg. As she topples over, Cam stops to check on her, and I manage to hit him in the shoulder. They continue coming closer to us, but we're deep enough that their shots hit the edge of the wall. There's no way they can see how many of us there are. Eric hisses vindictively as he strikes Four in the chest. I almost do the same when I catch Paige in the arm. This is now my favorite game. She throws her gun down angrily, cursing and skulking away. Once you've been hit, you have to head back to the train tracks to wait for everyone, and soon our field of vision is clear. Except a large shadow barreling towards us.

"Fuck. I'm out." Eric curses, dropping his gun on the floor. It's blatantly obvious, even from a distance, that the last man standing is Tom. No one else left has that amount of bulk.

"I've only got one shot left." I reply anxiously. It took me many more paintballs than Eric to strike the other team. My aim is not that good yet, because the gun is so large. I have trouble keeping it level, even leaning against Eric. Tom is nearly here. He's closer than we let the others get, and his eyes light up as he realizes there's only two of us. He takes aim with his gun at Eric. Eric groans in frustration, and I feel his arms wrap around me, steadying the gun for me. I shouldn't be surprised by how huge they feel. His hands clasp around mine, like they did in the training center. He growls in my ear.

"You miss greenie, and you're going t-" But I won't know what would happen if I miss, because I pull the trigger. It's like watching something in slow motion. Tom screams in anger as the paintball hits him squarely in the stomach.

"You bitch!" He sputters. Eric's arms tighten around me for a second. Tom is holding his stomach as he limps away. I hope it leaves a bruise. I breathe slowly, trying to slow my heart rate. That was fun. Eric slowly removes his arms from me, and starts climbing back over the fountain wall.

"If you had better aim, you would've had more than one shot left." He grumbles. All the same, he lifts me back over the wall. He can't be too mad, because unless our team completely failed at taking out whoever was guarding the other flag, we've won. Eric sets me down roughly, and I nearly fall over. We both turn towards the distance as we hear elated screaming, and see a bright glow headed towards the tracks. Our team has gotten the flag. Without speaking, we start running to the train. Most of Four's team is already there. Four looks from the group heading towards us with his flag, to Eric and I.

"Wait a minute. It was just you two at the fountain? Two people took out my entire team?!" He has an unbelieving look on his face. Eric grins widely. He's enjoying his victory over Four. I'm suddenly enveloped by a screaming mob.

"WE DID IT SHILOH WE DID IT WE WON!" Felix, Hazel, and Sam are dancing around me in circles while Pierce does a victory lap with the flag. I giggle and join in on their dancing. Sam stops, eyeing all of Four's team, who sit trying to wipe the paint off of their bodies. He's calculating how many there are. Before he can comment, we hear the roar of the train. Jumping into an open car seems like a natural movement to me now.

Sam and Felix begin replaying every moment for me. Pierce is still jubilantly running amok. I hug Jena and Cam as they approach.

"Sorry guys. I had no choice." I give them a contrite gaze. They both laugh. Jena's leg is still painted.

"Oh please. I just want to know how you managed to take out our whole team with just two people!" Cam cries out. I'm glad to see that he doesn't have a bruise on his shoulder. I open my mouth to answer him.

"Wouldn't have been so difficult if someone had better aim." Eric brushes past me as he aims for Four. Probably to gloat. I bite the inside of my cheek. I'm going to have to keep trying. We arrive back at Dauntless, and tiredly arrive to our dorm. Tom pauses at the doorway under the pretense of fixing his boots.

"You better watch yourself Shiloh." He whispers viciously to me as I pass. My spine stiffens. Hazel and Jena glare at him, steering me into the room. Everyone is asleep within record time, until only Cam and I remain awake.

"Do you think they'll give us the day off?" Cam asks, his whisper floating to me from the next bunk over. I snort, and suddenly we're stifling our laughter. Not a chance.

**Please leave me a review! Also, I still need ideas for Shiloh's fear landscape. Thanks!**

**-Imp**


	7. Chapter 7

_Some more thanks to Katherine Sparrow, marie190 , Dauntlessgirl347, and jart1992. Hopefully I haven__'__t missed anyone! If I did let me know! There will only be one more chapter with fighting(in the training arena) in it, so this boring stuff is almost over :)_

VII

"Pierce, did you sleep at all last night, er, I mean, this morning?" I querie, watching as he shovels a pile of eggs into his mouth. We're sitting in the dining hall for breakfast, and _most_ of us are exhausted. Pierce, however, came into the hall with wide eyes and a big grin. I'm not even sure he looked in the mirror, because his dark curls are completely askew. Natasha is staring at him with a mixture of amusement and dismay. He swallows a large gulp of eggs.

"I slept like a baby." He declares, waggling his eyebrows. Next to me, Hazel is leaning on Brent's shoulder, yawning widely. I think Cam has missed his mouth at least three times. Jena's simply staring at a pile of bacon on her plate, like it holds all the secrets of the world. There are large, dark circles under Sam's eyes, and his shoulders are hunched forward. The only other people in the hall who seem to have any energy are Eric and Uriah. They are still celebrating their win from last night. Four and Tris simply watch them.

I'm contemplating just drinking a glass of orange juice for breakfast, since I feel a bit nauseous, when Felix nudges my side. I turn to look at him. His green eyes are focused on something across the room. It doesn't take me long to find. Tom is looking daggers at me from his table, his light blue eyes narrowed malevolently. My insides constrict, but I don't look away. Pierce notices Felix and I's preoccupation.

"What's his problem with you?" He growls. With three of us staring down Tom, he finally looks away. I take a large sip of my orange juice. Pierce starts to stand up from the table. I grab his shirt with a surprising amount of strength, yanking him back into his seat.

"Pierce no! It's not even-don't-just no." I stammer. Now the whole table is watching us. I give him a pleading look. No matter how good of a fighter Pierce is, I still don't want him going toe-to-toe with Tom. Pierce crosses his arms, gazing at me with hazel eyes. Something in my expression convinces him, because he sighs and drops his arms.

"Fine. But if he messes with any of you, he's done for." I see him sneak a quick glance at Natasha, and I realize he's not worried just for me. I shrug, and finish the rest of my orange juice. I've got bigger concerns than Tom at the moment. The trainers have finished their breakfasts, and are heading out of the dining room, which means they'll expect us to be in the training room within a few minutes. It's a fighting day. We wave to Natasha, Pierce, and Sam, before trudging down to training.

As we enter the room, I immediately notice that Four has put up an updated list of our rankings. We still have a little while before cuts are made, but he likes to keep us informed. Tris had explained that last night's game counted for a big chunk of our score, because it was more of a real life situation, rather than just fake fighting in the arena.

1. Tom

2. Brent

3. Cam

4. Felix

5. Shiloh

6. Jena

7. Hazel

8. Paige

9. Justin

I'm absolutely elated. Four must have realized that Eric didn't do _everything_ last night. Felix's face splits into a big grin. Sam told me that Felix had taken out the remaining guards, so that had clearly given him a large boost. Unfortunately, Tom's poor performance last night hadn't been enough to knock him out of the top spot. But Paige must have done something to aggravate Tris or Four. She is absolutely infuriated, her face a crimson red. Below our rankings is the list of the first fights for today.

Hazel vs. Justin

Brent vs. Jena

Felix vs. Paige

Tom vs. Cam

I cringe for Cam, but I can't stop the relief that floods through my body. At least I get a little extra time to rest. Brent is giving Hazel some tips as she steps into the ring, but I don't think she'll need them. Justin looks terrible. I suppose hardly getting any sleep and being hungover takes its toll on the body. His hair looks like he washed it with olive oil, and his face is breaking out like there's no tomorrow. He steps into the ring, teetering a bit. Behind him, I can see that Four and Tris have a look of distaste etched on their faces. Eric simply looks amused, like he's watching an particularly funny scene unfold before him.

Hazel circles around Justin, and he looks dizzy just following her progress. Cam snorts beside me. She throws a jab to his neck, and he's down, gasping for air. Four rolls his eyes and drags Justin out of the ring. Brent squeezes Hazel's shoulders as he makes his way into the ring. Jena's retying her ponytail higher onto her head, and Cam is massaging her shoulders like I've seen in old shows about the old society. Apparently people used to watch others fight for entertainment. I glance at Eric, and note that it hasn't completely gone out of style.

It's always uncomfortable to watch two friends fight, especially when it's a boy vs. a girl. Brent does his best to avoid really hurting Jena, but he also can't look weak. Felix already learned that the hard way. Two quick jabs to the stomach and she's out. She winces a bit getting up, but otherwise she's fine.

Whatever uncomfortableness Felix felt about fighting a girl doesn't seem to apply to Paige. His eyes are lit up, and there's a course of movement throughout him as he strides up into the ring. Paige isn't an easy opponent, and for a minute I think he's going to lose. But then, he gets a second wind, and throws a hard punch to her jaw. She stumbles, and falls like a brick. I wonder if Felix is finally coming into his own. Tom curses under his breath, and suddenly I remember last night. I pull Cam down to my level to whisper in his ear.

"Cam, hit him in the stomach." I whisper urgently. He looks at me questioningly, but steps into the ring with more determination than I would have. I grimace as Tom hits Cam hard across the cheek, but Cam barely steps back. He edges in on Tom, and jabs him, once, twice, three times, hard in the stomach. Tom wheezes, and falls over. There is a shocked silence around us, before Jena runs up and embraces Cam. I notice Eric studying me, a pensive look on his face. He must know that I told Cam where to hit Tom. I hope that it won't take any points away from Cam's victory. Tom is up now, glaring at Cam with a deep discontent. I'm abruptly worried for Cam. Now two of us have to watch our backs.

"Okay, I want you guys to work freely for a bit before we have round two, and then we'll break for lunch before coming back." Four announces, gesturing to the room. We've never been given free reign of the room yet. Tom instantly heads to the punching bags, aggressively beating them, and I feel bad for whoever has to fight him next. Cam, Jena, Felix, and Hazel all head over to weight train. I watch for a minute as Cam helps Jena.

Brent is working directly with Four, who seems to have taken an interest in his fighting skills. He's showing him a few more advanced moves. Justin is pathetically lifting weights with Paige, who is grunting angrily. Still pissed about her loss to Felix and her ranking. I think about Eric's criticism of my aim last night, and decide to practice shooting. I'm not going to magically get stronger in the next hour, and I don't want to risk overtaxing my muscles before fighting. Maybe that's the Erudite in me speaking up.

There's no one over by the guns, so I have my pick of targets. I take the one on the very end. Shooting is one of the most powerful rushes I've ever felt. I like to take my time while I'm taking my shots. Each time, I'm getting a little bit closer, but still not close enough.

"You're never going to hit the target like that greenie." Just when I thought I'd have a moment of peace. Eric stands behind me, impassive. He's eyeing the holes in my target. I ignore him, face my target, adjusting the gun in my hands, and take another shot. It glances wide to the right.

"That was awful." He retorts. I look over my shoulder at him. He's tilting his head to the side, like he does when he's amused. I sarcastically echo his words from last night.

"Are you always this cheerful? Or just when you haven't gotten your beauty sleep?" I turn back to my target before I can see his expression, hoping that he'll go irritate someone else. I nearly jump out of my skin when I feel a hand on my waist.

"Here. You need to fix your posture, it's terrible. Your hips need to be aligned with your shoulders." His voice is a deep murmur. He drags his hand across my stomach, pulling my core in and allowing my hips forward. I try to listen carefully to what he's saying. Eric's hands move to my shoulders, his fingers resting against my bare skin.

"Your shoulders shouldn't be hunched forward. Let the tension out of them, and draw them back. The gun should be a natural extension of your arms." He removes his hands, and I try to drop my shoulders. I take aim once more, and fire a shot. It's not perfect like Tris, but it's pretty damn good.

"Now try and figure it out without me having to babysit you." Eric barks gruffly. I want to ask him why he would even bother helping me since he clearly doesn't like me, but I don't. I just chalk it up to him trying to find as many ways to annoy me as possible. At least this time, it was beneficial for me. I keep working with the gun, focusing on my posture, and slowly, my shots get better. I work until Four calls us back to the ring. The board has been updated with a new set of fights.

Paige vs. Tom

Shiloh vs. Hazel

Jena vs. Cam

Felix vs. Brent

I want to break down in laughter at the expressions on Paige and Tom's faces. Brent is shaking silently next to me. I'm pretty sure that Four and Eric are choosing these fights very deliberately. They've finally decided to give Justin a break. Cam and Jena are looking at each other awkwardly.

Tom and Paige enter the ring, and any reservations Tom had goes out of the window. That's the difference between him and the other boys. He quickly takes Paige out, and I almost feel bad for her, being taken out so brutally by one of her own friends.

I'm well-rested at this point, so I feel reasonable about my chances. Hazel and I circle each other for almost a full minute, neither one of us wanting to make the first move. Eric makes an impatient noise from the sidelines, so I go in and thrust at her shoulder. She's not expecting me, and flails over. Not her most graceful moment. I help her up, and she gallantly heads to the side with me.

Jena and Cam's fight is as awkward as Brent and Hazel's had been. Cam takes the easy way out, and knocks Jena over by kicking her legs out. She lands hard on her butt, and is unable to get up quick enough. He offers her an apologetic look as he pulls her to her feet. She simply smiles.

"I'll be expecting a massage later." She asserts, and Cam flushes a bit, but grins. Finally, Felix and Brent take the ring. It's actually a good fight, but Brent uses some of the new moves Four showed him, and eventually gets Felix down. Brent is now 4/4, and the only person who has won all his fights. Maybe he could push past Tom. Tom seems to be thinking along the same vein, and is watching Brent. Now three of us have to watch our backs. Four dismisses us for lunch, telling us to be back in thirty minutes for more fighting.

When we enter the dining hall, I'm floored to see that Pierce has a large purple bruise over his left eye. Natasha is holding an ice-pack to his face with one hand, and eating with the other. Pierce doesn't look disconcerted, and is eagerly waiting for us to tell his story. Sam sits across from him, a smug smile on his face. I immediately gather what has happened, and laugh. Only Pierce would be happy about his best friend beating him in a fight.

"You should have seen it! It was the apocalypse of all fights!" He cries as we plop down at the table.

**Eric****'****s POV**

"Tris, check and make sure these fights are right." I demand. I'm standing near the blackboard, writing up the fights for the afternoon. Unfortunately, I've run out of the weaker opponents for Shiloh to fight, so I have to give her Cam. At least he won't try and beat her to a pulp. Tom, the piece of shit, is another story, but I'm delaying that. Hopefully, it won't happen, because I don't think I'd be able to watch.

Tris is staring at me rather than the board, a funny look on her face. I glare back at her, knowing that she'll speak up whether I want her to or not.

"You called me Tris." She informs me. I shrug. Keeping up this whole "Stiff" routine is getting to be too time consuming.

"Just look at the fucking board." I snap. Tris checks her notes, and nods at the board. The initiates are beginning to file back into the room, reenergized from their lunch. It's really difficult to restrain myself from finding Shiloh. I focus my attention on the rankings that are still up from this morning. We've been discussing cutting less initiates. Harrison thinks that we should let anyone who wants to be Dauntless in. He says that we've become too selective. What if someone is able to contribute to our faction, but we cut them? Tori disagrees. She says we're only as strong as our weakest link. I'm not sure how I feel. As the head leader, the decision falls to me. All I know is that I won't be making a decision until after this first cut. There's no fucking way that Justin is making it into Dauntless.

Everyone gathers around the board, finding their names. Jena is sitting out this round.

Justin vs. Tom

Cam vs. Shiloh

Brent vs. Paige

Felix vs. Hazel

Justin looks absolutely petrified to be up against Tom. There's no question who's going to win this fight. Tom clobbers Justin, catching him square in the jaw. He stumbles out of the ring, and Tom looks far too proud of himself. I risk a glance at Shiloh. She's watching Tom with a combination of loathing and fear. I clench my fists together, remembering how Tom had called her a bitch last night. I have to think about other parts of the night to settle down. Having Shiloh to myself at the fountain. Her leaning against me for support. Wrapping my arms around her shoulders. _Fuck. Focus._

Cam and Shiloh start their fight. It gives me a good excuse to look at her. Shiloh is quick on her feet, dodging Cam's half-hearted punches. Her hair flies across her face, sticking to her forehead. Even though she knows she's probably going to lose, her grey eyes are bright. Cam knocks her over finally by catching her in the shoulder. She smiles good-naturedly as he helps her up. I would be jealous if I wasn't sure that Cam and Jena were sort-of together. It's always obvious which initiates are together.

I'm actually looking forward to Brent fighting Paige. He's a good fighter, despite being on the shorter size. Plus, I don't like Paige. Guilty by association. Brent actually wins a lot quicker than I expect. He's now five for five, and that seems like a good enough excuse to move him ahead of Tom in the rankings. And to move Paige down. Felix easily takes Hazel down, and we give the initiates free range again before their last fight of the day. I notice that Tris pulls Shiloh aside to work with her, and again I'm glad for her. Four casually walks over to the board, where I'm writing up the next set of fights.

"So." He remarks, his eyes running over the list. I clench my jaw. Something tells me that this won't be good. I don't reply, because I know he'll just speak anyway. He and Tris share many similarities.

"I think the only one you have to worry about is Felix." With that, he walks away, a flicker of humor on his face. I want to punch the asshole, but that might be kind of distracting to the initiates.

I know what he's insinuating. Cam is clearly with Jena, Brent is drifting towards Hazel. Shiloh has made it clear that she doesn't have feelings for Sam, and her other Dauntless friend, Pierce, is pursuing Natasha. That leaves Felix. I haven't noticed any particular flirting between them, but now that Four has put it into my head, it's all I will be able to think about. I'll have to watch the two of them carefully.

We summon the initiates back over to us for their last fights. I'm quickly running out of options for Shiloh to fight.

Jena vs. Paige

Tom vs. Brent

Cam vs. Justin

Shiloh vs. Felix

Paige, after losing three times today, and being low in the rankings, charges into the ring. Jena doesn't stand a chance. It's a vicious fight, and Jena leaves favoring her right leg.

Now for the fight we've all been waiting for. I'm hoping that Brent can take the asshole down. There's a moment, when I think he might. He aims for Tom's stomach, like Cam did. But Tom is ready for it this time, and he takes advantage of Brent's position, slamming him in the head. Brent crumples to the floor, and I hear Hazel gasp. He'll be okay, but definitely dizzy tonight. I should have Peter come down and fight Tom. Peter was in Tris's initiate class, and he's a particularly vicious fighter. He's begun to make amends with Tris recently, but I'm sure he'd still love to kick some ass. I would do it myself, but I don't trust myself to not go too far.

It's no surprise that Cam knocks out Justin in under thirty seconds. He quickly rushes back to Jena's side, holding a bag of ice on her leg. Felix crosses into the ring unwillingly. I have to admire Shiloh for coming at him with all she's got. He kind of takes out her knees after a few tries. I watch carefully as he helps her up, but I don't sense anything. Four doesn't know what he's talking about. I mean, one of his girlfriend's fears was for him to _be_ with her. I still find that amusing.

**Okay guys! So I****'****m not overly happy with this chapter, but I cut my ring finger earlier, and it****'****s a pain to type with. That****'****s my excuse anyway. :) Also, I have another question for you to ponder. When we get to the, ahem, lemons, in the story, how should I handle them? I don****'****t want it to be too graphic to jeopardize the integrity of the story, but I also don****'****t want it to seem prudish. Let me know where you think I should draw the line, either in a review or PM? And please please please review if you liked! It helps me a lot with figuring out the direction of the story. **

**-Imp**


	8. Chapter 8

_This chapter will probably end up being rewritten, as I'm not happy with it. Another chapter should be up tomorrow!_

VIII

Our bodies are starting to get used to the early morning hours. Four doesn't even come in the room anymore, knowing that we'll all make it to breakfast on time. If we didn't make it on schedule, I'm sure we'd hear about it. Usually Brent or Felix wakes first, and neither of them is exactly quiet. They set off a chain reaction. We've got a pretty good showering system worked out. The boys tend to shower in the morning, while the girls shower in the evening.

Everyone is nearly dressed, and starting to walk out of the dorm. I'm running a bit late this morning. Probably because I was up all night thinking about my fights. I had beaten Hazel, but lost to Cam and Felix. Hopefully the trainers had noticed the effort I put into the fights. I didn't want to lose my ranking. I'm deep in thought when Jena pokes my shoulder.

"Ready?" She asks, her ebony hair already pulled into a high ponytail. She's still limping a bit on her right leg, from her fight yesterday with Paige. I can see that it's bothering her, but she's trying not to show it. We're all becoming more Dauntless each day. I shake my head at her, gesturing to myself.

"I still have to get dressed. I'll met you guys there." She nods, and heads out of the room with Hazel, Felix and Brent. I find a pair of black pants that will fit me, and a black spaghetti strap top. I have only accrued a few pieces of clothing here; most of the training clothes we were given are in bigger sizes. I usually have to dig through the pile to find something in my size.

The regular pair of boots get shrugged on to my feet, and I leave my hair loose today. I had slept in braids, so it hangs in loose waves over my shoulders. I start to head towards the door when a hand takes hold of my arm. Thinking it's Tom, I sling around, raising my hand into a curled fist. My fist is inches from Cam's face when I realize my mistake and stop. His hazel eyes are widened in surprise.

"Oh sorry! I thought…" I trail off. There's no need to explain myself. Cam's eyes have already registered in understanding. He lets go of my arm, a troubled look on his face. My heart races. Did Tom threaten him? I knew he would, after Cam beat him. Cam runs his hands through his dark, wavy hair, and sighs.

"I need some advice." He blurts out, rocking back on his feet awkwardly. He looks like he'd rather not be talking to me, but has no choice. A flood of relief fills my body. I gesture for Cam to walk with me, and we go slower than usual. We've still got time to make it to breakfast.

"What's on your mind?" I question lightly, though I'm fairly certain I know already. He reddens a bit, and I bite my lip. I _definitely_ know what he's thinking about.

"You have to help me. I really like Jena!" He has a pleading look on his face. The words come out of his mouth chaotically, like he can't control himself. I roll my eyes dramatically at him.

"Okay, well first of all, you need to calm yourself down. You're going to have an anxiety attack." I instruct as we round the corner into the dining hall. He takes a deep breath, though it kind of sounds like he's choking. I pat his back, and begin to advise him.

"Secondly, I don't think you have _anything_ to worry about. Just keep being yourself. Well, yourself, minus the anxiety. " Cam pauses, a puzzled look on his face. I wait a moment, hoping I don't have to spell it out for him. He gets there eventually, and a big, silly smile crosses over his face. He starts speed walking to the table, leaving me in the dust.

I find a seat in-between Felix and Sam, and get a glass of orange juice. The stack of pancakes on Pierce's plate must be a foot tall. I don't know where he puts it. Cam is talking to Jena animatedly, and I give it until the end of the day before they're officially a couple. I simply sip my orange juice, but I'm done much earlier than the others.

"I'm going to head down to the training center early." I tell them, pushing myself out of the table. It's odd to be walking down the hallway when it's so quiet. When I get to the training center, it's empty except for Four. He's near the targets, setting up a table of knives. So _that's_ what we're going to be doing today. He motions for me to come over to him.

"Ever thrown a knife before?" He asks in his deep rumbly voice. There must be about one hundred knives on the table. I make a note to get a target far, far away from Tom. I pick one up, and inspect it. It's thinner and shorter than a regular kitchen knife.

"Never really had a reason to. It doesn't seem like it would be a good weapon. I mean, a gun you can fire many times, but a knife you've only got one shot, unless you're carrying around a bunch of them." Four smiles, and its a genuine smile, not the smirks that he's been giving Eric lately. He picks up a knife, and so fast that I can't see the motion, whips it at the target. It hits right in the heart.

"Sometimes you only need one shot." He remarks wisely. Now it's my turn to smile. I hand him the knife I hold.

"Can you show me again, but slower?" I ask, trying not to sound too much like I'm begging. Four grasps the knife by the blade, and slowly takes me through the motions. I keep my eyes wide, trying to absorb every motion. He hands me another knife.

"Just aim for the whole chest first. It takes time to even get the point to stick." I take my time, practicing the motions a few times. Finally, I let it go, releasing the knife just before my arm is parallel. It sticks nearly center. A clear voice speaks up from behind me.

"Not bad." Tris is standing behind us, a contemplative look on her face. She walks over to Four and I. She picks up another knife and hands it to me.

"Try again, but release just a bit later." I nod. I draw my arm back, and then let the knife release, trying to hold it for a second later. It sticks again, this time touching the edge of the heart. I feel a smile creep up on my face. Finally, something I'm good at. There are voices coming down the hallway, so I go and remove the knives from the target. I notice that Eric is standing the the side, looking at the board that holds our rankings.

_When did he come in?_ I think, hoping for once that he saw what I had been doing. The rest of the transfers enter the center, and I notice that Cam and Jena are walking together, shoulders touching. I have to turn around to hide my smile. Eric is calling the initiates over to the targets, his voice loud.

"Initiates, listen up. As you can tell, today we're going to be practicing throwing knives. There will be no funny business. If you goof around, you'll be standing in front of the target while I practice." Everyone goes silent then.

Tris demonstrates for everyone. I can see that Tom isn't really paying attention. No doubt he thinks it's a waste of time, and he'd rather use a gun. We take our places, and start throwing. Again and again, my knife sticks where I want it to go.

"How are you doing that?" Felix whispers incredulously. He's not bad, but not all of his stick yet. I just wink at him. No need to reveal my secrets. Somehow, Tom managed to get the target next to me. Even though he hadn't been paying attention, he's still pretty good. It's hard to be bad at something physical when you're so athletic. Still, I can tell he's getting frustrated that I'm better than him.

I'm taking aim when, with no warning, he suddenly darts in front of my target to pick up an errant knife. I drop the knife I'm holding, thankfully not hitting him.

"What the hell, you could have hit me! I told you to stop for a second!" He roars, his voice carrying across the room. _What?_ Everyone stops, turning to face us.

"What are you talking about, you ran in front of me!" I shriek, turning to Four. What is he playing at? Four looks from me to Tom, his eyes assessing our faces. Paige speaks up.

"No he didn't. I heard him ask you to stop, and you were going to hit him." Justin is standing behind her, nodding. My jaw drops. Tom is looking at Four expectantly. Suddenly I understand. He wants Four to think I was messing around. Four looks conflicted. I don't think he wants to get me in trouble, but if he doesn't, then Tom could claim favoritism. He has no choice.

"Initiate, go stand in front of that target." He instructs, his eyes unhappy. I walk, determined to look unafraid, and stand in the center of a target. There's finally a benefit to being small, and it's that there's a lot of target left around me.

"Eric?" Four holds out three knives. Eric is the one who made the threat, so he's the one who has to follow through. I just hope he's as good as Four. I'm surprised when Eric doesn't move towards Four right away. He just stares at the knives for a moment, before taking them in his hands. He stands across from me, adjusting the knives in his hands. I can see Tris standing near Four, and she looks perturbed. My friends look petrified. I focus my eyes on Eric's. I will not look away from the ice blue. I will not give Tom the satisfaction of flinching.

Eric's eyes are focused on the target as he throws the first knife. I feel it whoosh past my right shoulder, and can see it sticking there about five inches away. Tom makes a coughing sound, and for a moment I wonder if Eric is going to throw the knife at him.

The second knife buries itself about an inch away from my left side. Hazel has her eyes covered in the background. As he aims the third knife, Eric puts his eyes on mine. They don't move as he releases the knife. It grazes the right side of my neck, and I feel a glimpse of pain. He's cut me.

"Okay, go take a break. Be back in an hour. Shiloh stay here a minute to patch that up." Four sends everyone to lunch. Felix shoots me a worried look, but heads out of the room with the others. I'm still by the target, in shock. Four and Tris start cleaning up the knives.

"Are you okay?" Eric stands in front of me, holding a cloth. His eyes are on my neck, where I can feel blood oozing down. I just gape at him.

"You _cut_ me." I snap. Now is probably not the time to lose my temper, but I can't help it. Eric nods.

"If I hadn't, do you think Tom would have been satisfied? I knew exactly what I was doing." I don't answer him, taking my time to comprehend what he just said. He's cleaned off my neck with the cloth, and he takes out a bandage. He presses the bandage over my neck, and I flinch.

"Sorry." His voice is gruff. I look up at him. His face almost does look sorry, though I could be imagining it. Before I can stop myself, I ask him what's on my mind.

"Why are you being kinda nice to me?" Eric pulls his hand away from my neck, and his face goes back to normal.

"Don't get used to it." With that, he walks away, heading out of the training center. I'm more confused than ever.

**Ugh. This chapter just did not want to be written. I promise a much better one tomorrow. Obviously, this relationship is a slow burn, but I think we'll see something in the next chapter. :) Please leave me a review.**


	9. Chapter 9

_Some more thank yous to JailBreak423, TaylorNT, Sylvari Queen, Sam0728, crimsonwater5, and deep in the high. Thanks so much for reviewing, following, favoriting, and reading! And thank you to all of my readers, we're almost at 2k! Yay, here's the last fighting(in the training center hint hint oh what could that mean) chapter!_

_*Fixed the Initiate list_

IX

"Earth to Shiloh!" I think I jump about five feet out of my seat. Sam is waving his hands in my face from across the table, his blue eyes wide. I had been lost in thought. Thoughts of Tom beating me to death later. Very pleasant stuff. Today is our last day of fighting. Today, initiates were going to get cut. Today, I am going to have to fight Tom. There was no getting around it. Somehow I didn't think he was going to let me get out of it by falling over at the first punch. Jena and Hazel haven't fought Tom yet either, and they both are getting advice from their boyfriends. I know that they're both worried about their rankings. I wish I had the luxury of only worrying about making it, but I'm thinking that Tom has been waiting for this fight.

Sam slides a plate with some breakfast on it in front of me, staring at me expectantly. My insides flop, and I give it a skeptical look. There's no way my stomach is going to hold anything down. Pierce snatches a piece of bacon from the plate, and Natasha slaps his hand.

"Pierce, Shiloh needs to eat something. She needs energy. You can take a break from being a bottomless pit for one day." Pierce looks at me sheepishly. I groan. What's the point? Felix gently nudges my shoulder with his own.

"If he goes too far, me and Brent already talked. We'll take him down." He confides, eyeing Tom from across the room. Tom sits cockily at his table. He knows he's going to have an easy day, fighting three girls. I nibble on the edge of a piece of bacon. My mind wanders back to yesterday. I'm still trying to puzzle out the entire scene. Eric had implied that he was trying to help me, by cutting me. He had even been sort of civil towards me. Maybe I was starting to change his mind. I flashback to him taking care of my neck. His hand on my bare skin, and I had just wanted to close my eyes and-_Oh pull it together Shiloh. Don't even start. You can't think about someone like that who basically hates you._ I shudder, and put down the piece of bacon.

"Come on guys, let's just go." I croak. My hands shake as everyone rises together. Sam walks around the edge of the table to me. He engulfs me in his broad arms.

"Just do your best. Felix, Brent, and Cam will take care of you if something happens." He mumbles, releasing me. I nod, and turn to follow everyone out of the door. We're much quieter today walking down the hallway. There's a thick tension in the air. When we enter the training center, we arrive to find someone new standing with the trainers. He is tall, and largely muscled. I don't remember seeing him anywhere before. He has dark hair, green eyes, and a handsome face. He's chatting to Eric easily, but Tris stands a few feet away, eyeing him apprehensively. Four is across the room, wheeling the board over to the center.

Tom, Paige, and Justin come filing in behind us. Eric continues talking to this new person, ignoring us, until Four has brought the board over. Four gestures to Eric's companion.

"Initiates, this is Peter. He was in Tris's initiation class, and is one of Dauntless' best fighters. Peter is here today to watch your last fights and give his input to us." The light doesn't completely reach Four's eyes, and I surmise that he's not Peter's biggest fan. Nor is Tris, by the look of it. Peter's face breaks into a wide grin as he surveys us. There's something slightly off-putting about him. I notice the board is still empty.

"I'm going to give you guys about thirty minutes of warm-up time while I figure out this first round. Peter, Tris, and Eric will be walking around to give you some final tips." Four announces, turning his back to us and facing the board. Well, at least I know I've got thirty more minutes to live. I decide that I might as well work with the punching bag for some last minute practice. I find one that's relatively isolated, and get to work. I'm trying to focus on my posture, but something just doesn't feel right. Peter has made his way over to me, his eyes surveying my progress.

"Are you even trying to move the bag?" He questions, his voice heavy and bored. Oh great, another Eric. Just what I need. I twist around to make a reply, but find that he has a mischievous, teasing smile on his face.

"Well, you could tell me what I'm doing wrong." I remark, throwing him an overly sweet smile. Peter marches over to me.

"Here, I can show you better than I can tell you." He turns my body back toward the bag. I lift my hands up like I'm about to take a punch. Peter stops me.

"Look, you're too rigid. You need to let yourself be grounded, and let the punch flow through you." Peter's hands guide me, pulling my elbows further back. His whole body is pressed against mine now as he adjusts my arms to where he wants them.

"I wouldn't if I were you, Peter." Tris is standing near us, a knowing smile on her face._ Wait, why shouldn't he help me?_ I wonder, a bit disappointed. I had kind of thought Tris was rooting for me. Peter steps away from me, shrugging his shoulders at Tris.

"Oh don't be such a hypocrite, look at you and Four! Why wouldn't I flirt with a pretty initiate?" He demands, winking at me before walking over to Tris. I feel my face redden. He was flirting with me? Tris just smiles wider.

"That's not _exactly _the problem." Her eyes wander to across the room. I glance there too. I can see Felix and Cam lifting weights. Four and Eric are standing by the board, seemingly arguing about something.

"Walk with me, and I'll tell you all about it." Tris goes on, heading back to where Four and Eric stand. Peter looks as confused as I feel. but he walks with Tris as she whispers something in his ear. I am thoroughly bewildered by what has just happened, but I don't have time to worry about it. I practice until Four's voice calls us back to the center.

"Remember, the first cuts will happen tonight. All we ask is that you put your best effort forth. Peter will give us his advice based on your fighting, and we will also evaluate other aspects of your performance so far." I glance at Peter. He's watching me, but now with a contemplative, almost amused expression on his face. He quickly turns his gaze elsewhere when our eyes meet. I puzzle over what Tris could have said to him. Regardless, I'm thankful, because Peter doesn't seem like the type I want to be involved with. My heart feels like it might explode as Four flips the board over.

Justin vs. Jena

Tom vs. Hazel

Cam vs. Paige

Brent vs. Shiloh

In all my worrying about fighting Tom, I had forgotten that I still had to fight other people too. Brent has a pained look on his face, and I know its not for me, but for Hazel. I don't even watch the first fight, because I know how it's going to end. To be honest, I have no idea how Tom even became friends with someone like Justin. Peter actually laughs out loud, and that's how I know Jena has won.

Hazel steps up to the ring shakily, and I'm already wincing for her. I stand with Brent, my hand on his shoulder. Felix and Cam stand on the other side, ready to jump into the ring if needed. Tom waits lazily in the center of the ring. Hazel goes to throw a punch at him, and he blocks it, then takes her down. I'm floored when he simply wins by letting Hazel stay down. Brent is eyeing Tom suspiciously, but goes to hug Hazel. She's basically unharmed. Jena looks relieved, but I'm unconvinced. There's no way that Tom is satisfied with winning like that. There's something else at play. My suspicions are confirmed as Tom passes by me.

"I'm saving everything I've got for you." He hisses savagely in my ear. My spine stiffens up. For the first time, I want to run out of Dauntless screaming. I root my feet to the ground and watch as Cam fights Paige. Cam has really been training hard, and he manages to get Paige down within a few minutes. Jena gives him a big hug as he exits the ring. I pat Hazel on the back.

"I'm glad you're okay. I'm going to go beat up your boyfriend now." She and Felix laugh, shoving me up to the ring. Brent yawns, like he was waiting ages for me. It's about as unfair of a fight as you can get, but he's pretty gentle when he finally gets me out.

"What happened?" Hazel jokes as I step down from the ring. Brent wraps his arms around our shoulders.

"Girls, you just can't mess with perfection." He chides, flashing a bright smile. Hazel giggles while I just shrug his arm off my shoulder. Four and Eric are making up the next round while Peter is talking to Tris.

"Alright initiates. Second round for today, and then you can break for lunch before your last round."

Shiloh vs. Paige

Tom vs. Jena

Cam vs. Hazel

Justin vs. Felix

Paige cracks her knuckles together, and I can see that Tom has a smirk on his face. Jena touches my shoulder as I head into the ring. From the corner of my eye, I can see Tris watching intently, and I remember what she told me. She told me to get mad. I think about Tom, and maybe getting cut tonight. I think about how others think I'm weak, and about all of Eric's teasing, and feel the frustration and anger pulsing through my body. Paige lurches across the ring, and I launch myself at her. Tris told me to use my knees and elbows, so I do. I kick, punch, and elbow faster than she can react, letting all of my anger out. Paige stumbles to the floor after I've elbowed her in the stomach.

There is absolute silence. Then, my cheering squad screams. Tom looks thunderous. Felix and Jena embrace me when I get back down out of the ring. I peek at Tris, and she's got a huge smile on her face. Even Four and Peter look impressed. Eric, of course, stands impassive. Paige is sniffling in the corner, and I try not to feel too pleased.

Though Tom is smoking with anger, he doesn't take it out on Jena. Again, he wins after a single takedown. I may have just dug my own grave by beating Paige like that.

"Hey Cam, if you hurt my girl, I'm going to have to beat you up again." Brent calls as they take the ring. Cam grins, and succeeds in getting Hazel out without hurting her. For the second time, I almost feel bad for Justin. He wears a look of absolute defeat after Felix beats him. Then again, he's friends with Tom.

Four dismisses us, telling us to be back shortly. We head back to the dining hall, in much higher spirits than this morning. At least, most of us do. I'm an absolute wreck, knowing that in another hour, I'm going to be standing across a ring from Tom, expected to fight. As we sit down, Sam is assessing the girls faces. He looks surprised.

"Didn't you girls have to fight Tom today?" Jena and Hazel nod as they pile lunch onto their plates.

"Hazel and Jena did. He went easy on them. Maybe he realized he wouldn't get any points for beating up someone so much weaker than him." Felix theorizes. I take a large gulp of water, knowing that's not true. I manage to eat some of a sandwich while I watch a scene unfold at the trainers table. Four and Eric are arguing fiercely, while Tris and Peter listen. Four doesn't look happy about what Eric's saying to him, but he keeps shrugging his shoulders in defeat. Eric shoves his way out from the table, and stalks out of the room. I train my attention back to my table. Pierce and Sam are retelling their fights from today, and guessing where they will rank tonight.

We finish lunch, and this time it's Pierce who comes to hug me. I try to stop shaking. He doesn't offer me any words, just squeezes me hard. Everyone is chattering away like normal as we go back to the training center. They all seem to be under the impression that Tom is going to take it easy on me.

Four and Eric are standing as far away from each other as possible, with Tris and Peter in-between them. Eric's eyes are burning with rage. If I were Four, I would have started running a long time ago. Four ignores the scorching look he's receiving from Eric, and just shows us the board, though we all know our fates now. There's only one person left for each of us to fight.

Hazel vs. Jena

Justin vs. Brent

Cam vs. Felix

Shiloh vs. Tom

There's no surprise left, but at least they've given me a few extra minutes to live. Four gestures for Hazel and Jena to take the ring. Cam and Brent grin awkwardly at each other, both wanting their own girlfriend to win. I stand with Felix, cheering on the both of them. It should be a good fight. Jena circles around Hazel, jabbing at her. Hazel is light on her feet, and attacks back. It's actually a pretty long fight. Jena tries to hit Hazel in the stomach, but Hazel is quicker, and hits Jena while she's in a vulnerable position. Jena goes tumbling over, and Hazel wins. She helps Jena up, and they are both grinning when they exit the ring.

Brent pecks Hazel on the cheek before heading for his last fight. It's a sad way for him to end his terrific record, but he takes Justin out, going 7-1. The only other initiate who has a chance of doing that is Tom.

Cam and Felix face each other, and we know this should be a good fight too. Still, I'm actually a little surprised when Felix wins. Not that he isn't a good fighter. He's just come a long way in a few days.

Now the time has come for me to fight Tom. I take a deep breath, trying to calm myself. Tom's face is filled with a vindictive ecstasy as he starts toward the ring. Eric's voice interrupts him.

"I have a proposition." He barks, stopping Tom in his tracks. I'm thinking that no good can come from this. Eric wanders over to me, his eyes emotionless. His hand grasps my shoulder tightly.

"You can either fight greenie here, whom you're sure to beat." I know it's obvious I'm going to lose, but does he have to rub it in? Eric lets go of my shoulder, and heads over to where Peter stands.

"Or, you can take the challenge to fight Peter here." Eric's voice is casual, but I see the challenge in his eyes. Peter immediately jumps forward, his body tensing automatically. I immediately see what Eric has done. No matter how much Tom wants to refuse, because he wants to fight me, he can't. If he did, it would look like he was afraid of Peter. I hardly dare to breath. Tom isn't as skilled as keeping his face neutral like Eric, and I can see the contempt showing through his mask.

"I'll fight Peter." He snarls. Peter whips up into the arena, bouncing on his feet. Tom stomps up, his fists curled. Four is leaning forward to watch. It's instantly obvious that no matter how big and malicious Tom is, he's nothing compared to Peter. Peter is _vicious._ There's no other word for it. Tom is going to wake up bruised. He catches Tom in the head, hard, and for a moment, I think Tom has gone unconscious. He gets up after a minute, a lethal expression on his face. Peter walks out of the ring flippantly. Four might have a slight smile on his face as he addresses us.

"Initiates, that's it for today. Tris, Eric, Peter and I are going to confer with Uriah and Marlene. You'll get your rankings after dinner." He heads out of the center with Tris by his side. Peter is grinning.

"Thanks Eric. Glad I came today." Eric grunts, turning his body back to the board as Peter runs after Tris and Four.

"Are you coming Shiloh? We're going to go to the Pit." Jena is pulling at my arm. The others are already making their way out. I incline my head to the door.

"I'll meet you guys there in a minute." I tell her. She looks at me curiously, but nods, and follows the others out. I walk cautiously over to Eric. His back is turned to me.

"Why did you do that?" I question. Eric turns around, surprised to find me standing there. His eyes search me for a minute.

"I thought he needed to be taught a lesson. Everyone needs to lose at least once." I'm unconvinced, and I cross my arms, taking another step closer to him.

"No, I don't buy it." I counter. Eric's icy eyes narrow at me, and again I wonder if I have a death wish. "You could have done that when he was fighting Jena or Hazel. Why me?" He doesn't respond, simply gazing at me.

"Did you think I couldn't handle myself?" My voice raises in tempo. He snorts, running a hand over his hair.

"Did I think you couldn't handle yourself against someone who's a foot taller than you, outweighs you by at least a hundred pounds, and seems to have some sort of vendetta against you? No way." His voice is dripping with sarcasm. I turn away from him, not asking the real question on my mind. _Why does he care what happens to me?_

**Eric's POV**

I hold in my smirk as Shiloh stomps away from me, in case she turns back around to question me some more. She's sexy as hell when she's pissed off, even if it's at me. If she had any idea how much I wanted to take her into my arms right then…

I shake my head. Now is not the time to get distracted. I have to meet up with the trainers, to determine who's going to get cut. I'll have plenty of time to figure out how I feel about Shiloh.

**Shiloh's POV**

I'm still perplexed by my conversation with Eric as we await the rankings. We sit in the training room with all of the initiates, including the Dauntless-born. Felix is extremely jittery next to me. I wish he would stop, because it's making me more nervous. Finally, Four, Tris, Marlene, Uriah, and Eric come into the room, dragging the board with them. Eric steps forward as Four and Uriah prop up the board, which is covered.

"Initiates. There are nineteen of you. Tonight, we cut four. We've taken every day into account. If you sit below the line, at number 16 through 19, you're out. If you're above, you've survived for stage two." I've never been so nervous in my life. The last few days play through my mind as Four unveils the board.

1. Pierce

2. Brent

3. Tom

4. Sam

5. Felix

6. Cam

7. Shiloh

8. Natasha

9. Tally

10. Porter

11. Jena

12. Hazel

13. Paige

14. Trent

15. Lily

16. Chase

17. Sala

18. Tara

19. Justin

At first it's quiet. Then, the hugging begins. I want to dance, scream, and run around all at the same time. Pierce does just that. I'm safe for now. For now, I'm Dauntless.

**Finally, the last fighting chapter. I know you guys don't want long descriptions of fights. Something big is coming in the next chapter. You didn't think I'd let Shiloh and Eric escape Tom that easily, did you? ;) And maybe *gasp* Eric will start having to confront his feelings for Shiloh, and vice versa. Please leave me a review! I get so excited when I get a notification of a review.**


	10. Chapter 10

_A few more thanks to nolechic512, and to all of those who have reviewed more than once. Thank you for supporting this story._

_*A note to readers: This chapter contains some graphic imagery in it, so fair warning if that will bother you. _

X

**Eric's POV**

I haven't been in my fear landscape in months. But since the initiates were going to start facing their fears today, I figure I might as well look like I know what I'm talking about. It's early in the morning, and I'm giving up my morning workout for this. The hallway that holds the simulation rooms is empty and dark. I make my way into a room, and lock the door behind me. The simulation serums are already prepared for the initiates. I take one in my hand a little warily. The last time I was given a serum, I'd ended up a mindless drone, waking up to see dead Dauntless and Abnegation in front of me. Once I've hooked myself up to the chair, I inject myself with the clear liquid, and wait. I will face my six fears.

I wake up in a room full of mirrors. My first fear has not changed. It's also the most vain of my fears. The reflection in the mirror both resembles me, and does not. He's lost all his muscle, and his face is disfigured. My instructor had likened this fear to the fear of imperfection, but I disagree. It's not like I think I'm perfect. Fuck, I'm far from it. I think its more about the fear of me losing my power. Of weakness. This fear is also the easiest one to overcome. A Dauntless wouldn't let a mirror define him. So I smash it.

The mirror crumbles to the ground, and I enter my second fear. A particularly stupid one. I'm in a large crowd, people shoving against me. I immediately feel my temper rising, and I want to knock over everyone who pushes into me. I'm not sure this is so much a fear of crowds, or being claustrophobic, as it is just a hatred of it. Like every time before, I must run into the center of the crowd, and let myself be engulfed by them.

My third fear is a bit cerebral. This one took me a few tries to figure out my first run through it. I'm watching myself in the simulation room, hooked up to the chair. Others watch my fears on the screen. My instructor had said that I don't want other people to know my fears, because it makes me vulnerable. Whatever. To move past this fear, I have to walk out of the door. Sometimes being brave is about letting go. No matter how much I want to hit everyone in the room. I walk towards the door, and the scene shifts.

The people disappear. I'm laying in a dark room, unable to move. My chest constricts automatically. I particularly hate this one. The fear of immobility. I can't move a muscle, no matter how hard I try. I know to conquer this fear, I simply have to calm myself, but it's difficult. I think about Shiloh's face, and my breathing slows.

For some reason, I've now entered my final fear. I've skipped one. My biggest fear sits before me. The fear of failure. Two Dauntless hang over the chasm. They've only got seconds left. I can only save one, the one I'm closest to. Usually, it's two unrecognizable faces. Today, one of the faces is Shiloh, the Dauntless that's farther away. _Damn it. _I'm not completely surprised. I had prepared for this scenario. Your fears can only change when something drastically changes in your life. Her hands are barely grasping the edge of the metal railing. I know that the simulation won't let me save her, and I don't want to see her fall more than once, so I don't even try. I grab the arms of the random Dauntless near me, closing my eyes so I won't have to see her demise.

I wake up heavily, sweat pouring across my face. I'm back in the simulation room. I take a moment to calm my breathing, and a smile creeps across my face. I've lost a fear. Maybe I'll make Four call me Five now. Previously, my fifth fear had been of Max casting me out of Dauntless. I guess now that's he dead, that fear no longer exists. I wipe my face off, and walk back out of the door, where a sickening sight awaits me.

Tom and Shiloh are there, intertwined, kissing passionately. Tom's leaning down. He's got her pulled up against his chest, one hand wrapped in her golden hair, the other resting across her back. Shiloh's arms are reaching over his shoulders, standing on her toes to bridge the gap between them. That's when I realize that I'm still in the simulation. My worst fear has changed. But I've got to figure out how to get out. Most of the time, your response to the fear is actually the fear itself manifested. Running into the crowd, letting myself be still, only saving one Dauntless. What is the bravest action I can take here? I know what I _want _to do. I want to go over and punch the asshole. But that doesn't seem right. That wouldn't conquer my fear. My third fear comes back to me, and I realize what I have to do. _Fuck. _My stomach drops. I have to walk away. That reveals my true fear, of letting her be with someone else. I feel like my stomach is going to contract to nothing as I walk away.

This time when I wake up, I'm sure I'm awake. I rip the electrodes from my head, rubbing my temple. Still six fears. But different. I growl, sitting up from the chair. There's no way I'm going back into my landscape anytime soon. I've got the image of Shiloh and Tom fresh in my mind to aggravate me. I decide to tell Four and Tris that they can handle the initiates without me for today. I need to clear my mind out, or someone might really get hurt.

**Shiloh's POV**

Tris, Four, and Peter stand before the eight of us. Eric is nowhere to be found, and apparently Peter is filling in for him. We're in a dim hallway that I didn't even know existed. There's a row of doors facing us, and I'm reminded of the testing rooms at school. Tom and Paige stand off to the side, both very sullen. Justin is gone. Tom was ranked behind both Pierce and Brent. Paige barely made it. All of these things are surely weighing on them. Meanwhile, Felix is bouncing happily in place. Brent and Hazel are holding hands, while Cam is simply stealing glances at Jena whenever he can. Tris's light voice is speaking to us now.

"Today, you're going to face a fear that you have. Part of being Dauntless is about learning how to conquer fear. At the end of stage two, everyone will go through their _whole_ fear landscape, as your final test. Today, you will receive a simulation injection that stimulates the fear center in your brain, and enter a simulation of _one_ of your fears. The simulation will end when you either calm your heart down enough, or you find a way to defeat the fear in the simulation. Four and I will be watching your fear on screen, to see how you handle it. You must find the most Dauntless way to conquer your fear." Her last sentence rings in my head. The most Dauntless way.

I think back to my aptitude test. I hadn't been only Dauntless then. That's how the man had realized I was Divergent, because I didn't confine to one way of thinking. I gulp. I'm going to have to really focus during my simulation on finding the Dauntless answer. Otherwise, my Divergence could be found out. Everyone looks a bit nervous about having to face their worst fears.

"Okay, Felix go with Tris. Paige, come with me. Brent, with Peter." Four commands, twisting to one of the doors. I pat Felix on the back as he passes me, looking terrified. The doors close behind them. I head over to Jena and Hazel, and we sit down with Cam, leaning against the wall.

"What do you guys think your fear is going to be?" Jena asks us, twirling her ebony hair with one finger. Hazel shivers.

"Probably something with needles. I hate needles." She confides softly. Jena's eyes widen.

"Oh my god, me too! Like imagine just a room full of needles, and you can't get out." She exclaims, shuddering. Cam rolls his eyes. There's a clock above the doors, and after about fourteen minutes, Felix is the first to leave. He comes trudging over to us, his green eyes unblinking.

"Well?" Cam asks him as he slides against the wall. Felix just kicks out his legs, like he's trying to get something off of him.

"Urrrrgh bats. So many bats everywhere." Cam's lips twitch. Tris comes out of the room for her next initiate two minutes later, at the same time Brent does.

"Okay, Jena with me." Tris commands. Jena takes a deep breath and follows her into the room. Brent plops down next to Hazel, but he doesn't look too bad. Hazel rubs his arm as he goes into a description of being underground.

"Hazel." Peter calls out. Brent kisses her on the cheek before she goes into the room. It's been about thirty minutes before Paige finally emerges from the room. Her face is a stark white, and her eyes don't seem to really be seeing anything. Four calls Tom into the room as Paige falls against the wall. She just sits there, staring at the ground. Jena comes out of the room after being in there for about sixteen minutes. She's shaking, but eager to tell us what she saw.

"Oh my gosh, so I was in this room, right? And-" She's interrupted by Tris's voice calling the next initiate.

"Shiloh." I stand up slowly, and follow Tris into the room. There's a chair identical to the one from the aptitude test. I sit down as Tris shuts the door after her. She gives me a smile as she hooks up the electrodes to my head.

"Nice fighting yesterday. It's almost like someone gave you an amazing strategy or something." I grin widely. She pulls out a needle filled with clear liquid. I wonder if Hazel and Jena had freaked out.

"This is the simulation serum." Tris carefully injects me with the serum in my neck, taking care to avoid the cut that's still there from Eric.

"It will be over before you know it. Remember, just be Dauntless." She tells me. I mean to reply to her, but suddenly she isn't there anymore. Suddenly, nothing is there. I'm floating in a large ocean. There is no land to be seen. No boats, no sea creatures, nothing. Just a wide dark blue sea. I panic. I'm not a good swimmer, and I immediately begin to struggle against the waves. That's when I remember. I'm in a simulation. I have to be Dauntless. But what would a Dauntless do in this situation? I close my eyes, wishing for a sandbar or something. My feet hit a thick bank of sand.

I'm abruptly back in the simulation room, gasping. Tris unhooks the electrodes from my head, and her face is impossible to read. She turns to me, a triumphant look appearing.

"You're Divergent." She states, like she's telling me a fact. My throat tightens as I sit up. _How does she know?_ I'm about to start denying it, when I study her face more carefully. Tris is not afraid of me. She is not acting like my being Divergent is a bad thing. She almost looks…proud. That's when I put it all together. Tris is Divergent too. She beams when she realizes I have figured it out.

"How did you know? What gave it away?" I sputter, standing up from the chair. She taps her head.

"You manipulated the simulation. A Dauntless would have swam deeper into the water. You essentially willed something into the simulation that didn't exist." I gulp. Now that she puts it that way, the answer seems obvious.

"You need to figure out a way past your fears like a true Dauntless. You can't change them. You'll be fine with me or Four in here, but your final test, all of the trainers and Dauntless leaders will be watching. Divergence isn't a death sentence anymore, but you still have to be careful. We don't know if there are others who feel the same way Jeanine and Max did." I nod as she walks me to the door.

"Meet me at the tattoo parlor tonight. There's someone else who can help you and I puzzle through your fears." Tris offers as she opens the door.

"Thanks." I reply quietly. I make my way over to my friends. Hazel is out now, but Cam must have gone in with Peter. Tom isn't out yet. Felix looks up in surprise at me.

"Did you not do it?" He asks. I wonder if my face doesn't look afraid enough. I make it a point to shake as I sit down next to him.

"Of course I did. I was stuck in this big ocean." I shudder, and it's genuine. Jena looks at me, disbelief etched across her face.

"But Shiloh, you were only gone for five minutes." I blink. Tris didn't mention my time. They're all watching me now, waiting. I shrug at them.

"I don't know. I guess I just figured it out really fast." They accept it, for now. Tom exits the room, and doesn't glance our way as he heads out of the hallway with Paige. Finally, Cam is set free.

"How'd it go Cam?" Brent inquires. Cam just puts his head in his hands, messing up his wavy hair.

"I fucking hate snakes." He mutters. Now it's Felix's turn to be amused. The one good thing about stage two is that we have the afternoon off, and so we head out of the hallway, leaving our fears behind us for now.

Later, at night, I've found my way to the tattoo parlor. It's getting pretty late, so most of the Dauntless that are still out are in one of the bars. I had seen Tom in one of the windows, and speed-walked by. The parlor seems abandoned. I find Tris in the back of the shop, sitting in a chair and talking to someone. My heart stops when I realize its Tori. I'm thinking that I've been set up, when Tori raises her hand, sensing my discomfort.

"It's okay. Me too." She says simply. My heart restarts again. Tris motions for me to sit down with them, and I do, ready to finally lay my Divergence out on the table.

….

_Readers, there is a small amount of graphic imagery ahead. Please skip if that will bother you._

Tris, Tori, and I had spent many hours talking. Tori had spoken about how her brother had been killed for his Divergence. We had discussed what I had thought my fears would be, and how to overcome them. I wave goodbye to them in front of the parlor as they both head down one hallway, towards their apartments. I head the opposite way, towards the dorm.

By now, all of the bars are deserted. I've never seen the Pit lifeless like this. It's a little creepy. I walk as fast as I can. I'm in the first set of hallways leading to our dorm when a large shadow moves away from the wall. I stop.

"I've been waiting for you." The shadow steps into the light. Tom. His eyes are a bit hazy, and again I can smell the alcohol on him. Before I can make a move, he's grabbed me, and shoved me up against the wall, hard. I can feel the bruises blooming on my back already.

"We never got to have our fight." He intones, his eyes dark. I try to break free, but he laughs, twisting my arm and grabbing my throat. More bruises. Tom presses himself against me, trapping me between him and the wall.

"If you scream, I'll kill you." He promises, before shoving his lips roughly against mine. I've been kissed before by a few Amity boys, on dares. But they were always just light pecks, one second long. He forces his tongue past my lips, and I want to die. Tom's hands are ripping at the fabric of my pants, his nails scratching marks into my bare skin. I push my hands against his chest, but I could be pushing against a stone wall for all the difference it makes. His hand travels to my shirt, ripping at the fabric. He slips one hand under the hem of my shirt, and grasps at my breasts, his lips still assaulting mine. The worst part is that he's enjoying every minute, groaning in vindictive pleasure. I'm thinking that if I can just get my face free from his, I'll scream. I'll scream louder than I ever had, because death would be better than this. Death would be better than what I'm sure he has in mind for me.

I'm about to bite him, and scream my head off, when he suddenly stumbles away from me. I crumple to the floor, the pain from my back inhumane. There's a loud noise, like the break of a bone, and Tom is running down the hallway. He runs smoothly, and with revulsion I realize that he wasn't as drunk as he portrayed. Eric stands before me, and I've never seen him look angrier. He's looking from me on the floor, and to the hallway that Tom has disappeared down. He looks at me again, and with resolve on his face, picks me up. The pain is unreal.

Eric starts back the other way with me, easily holding my weight against his chest. He rushes through the Pit, and down the hallway that Tori and Tris went. I know that the infirmary is this way, and I assume that's where he's taking me until he turns down an unfamiliar hallway. At this point, I'm coming in and out of consciousness. I hear a door opening, and feel myself being set down.

"Do you think you can stand? I'm going to grab you a shirt." Eric asks, his voice the sound of gravel. I focus on his face until the rest of the room comes into view. His eyes that are normally cold are burning. I have the urge to step away from him. We're standing in a bathroom that's much nicer than the dorm ones. I nod, grasping the sink that's next to me to help. I glance in the mirror, and then look back quickly in shock.

My neck is bruised down into my shoulder and up into the curve of my jaw. The black tank top I had worn is in tatters, my bra clearly visible underneath it, and I can see the scratch marks underneath on my arms and torso, already dripping with blood. My pants are no better. Purple marks climb up my right arm. I don't even want to know what my back must look like. Eric comes back into the bathroom, holding a black t-shirt.

"I don't think I have any pants that would fit you, but this should be long enough. I can get some from Tris for you to wear in the morning." He stands next to me, waiting. I think he knows that there's no way I'm going to be able to get undressed and clean my wounds by myself, but he doesn't want to traumatize me more. Who knew Eric had a thoughtful side?

"Okay" I reply, my voice hoarse. My throat is almost as bad as by back. Eric takes that as assent to help me, and steps up to me. He slowly lifts the remains of my shirt over my head, and I have to calm myself. _This is Eric. Not Tom. He's trying to help you._ It's a struggle to lift my arms up. He's tall enough that he can glance over my head to my back. I hear him suck in a breath. If my back looks bad enough for Eric to pity me, it must be bad. He wipes off the blood from my arms and stomach, and I try not to wince. I'm surprised at how careful he is, trying to touch me as little as possible.

Eric helps me into his shirt before addressing my pants, and I'm guessing he's trying to save me from feeling awkward. There's nothing awkward about Eric though, and that somehow calms me down. The shirt is huge, easily the length of a dress. He pulls off my tattered pants, and begins cleaning the cuts on my thighs. One of his hands rests against the back of my thigh to keep me steady.

"Thank you." I whisper throatily as he stands back up. He doesn't answer, but his eyes soften just a bit. Eric carries me out of the bathroom, and I realize we are in a large apartment. _His _apartment. He sets me down on his bed, which is surprisingly soft. I would have thought he slept on a bed of nails. Eric snorts, and I realize I said that last part out loud. The pain is making me a little delirious. I shuffle onto my stomach. There's no way I'm sleeping on my back. Eric's scent is all over the pillows.

A hand slips up the back of my shirt, and I stiffen for a second. The hand pauses, and I can see Eric leaning over me now.

"It's a ice pack. So you can sleep." His voice has mellowed out a little. I relax, and he rests the cold against my skin. A whimper escapes my lips, and I want to smack myself. You can't act like a baby around the Dauntless leader.

"Shiloh, you were just brutally attacked. Even Dauntless are allowed to feel pain." I hear the familiar sarcasm in his voice, but I appreciate it all the same. Eric pulls my hair back from my face, and his hand lingers against my cheek for a moment. I can't make sense of it.

"Just rest." He instructs. He removes his hand, and sits down on the floor next to the bed, leaning against the wall. Like he's guarding me. I'm trying to understand what I'm feeling, but there's just too much. I simply stare into Eric's ice blue eyes, and he gazes back at me, until I can't keep my eyes open any longer.

**What did you think? Leave me a review please! :)**

**-Imp**


	11. Chapter 11

_Sorry for the delay in posting! I had a bunch of finals and papers due, so I was quite busy. I tried to make up for it with a longish chapter. I still have a few more exams and such this week, but hopefully I will still be able to post frequently. And I'm working on another Divergent fanfic, so hopefully I can get the first chapter up soon! Some more thank yous to Free Lookoom, , tiarna13, Camiria, virgie123,Clemences-are-so-sexy, and monnalisa. And a big thanks to all my readers, we're over 3k now!_

XI

Eric holds me in his lap, facing him. Blue eyes are looking at silver. We're sitting on his bed, intertwined. His arms are wrapped tightly against my back, pressing me against his chest. I'm not sure how we got to be in this position, but I'm certainly not complaining. He presses his lips to my shoulder, my neck, and finally, my lips. I wind my arms around his strong shoulders, pulling myself closer to him. It's not close enough. Eric's hands travel over my bare legs, raising goosebumps on my skin. They stop at the edge of my shirt. Of his shirt. There's a harsh whisper.

"Scream and I'll kill you." I pull away from him in fright, and have a horrid realization. It's not Eric. It's Tom. I'm not in Eric's room. I'm in the Dauntless hallways. Tom has my arm twisted, pressed against the wall. He's shoving his lips against mine, tearing my clothes. I try to break away from him to scream. But no one comes to save me this time.

I wake up, gasping for breath. Sweat rolls down my face. The clock near me tells me it's about five in the morning. My body is used to waking up this time, but my eyes can't find anything familiar. For a moment, I don't remember how I got here. Or where I am, for that matter. I'm in a large apartment, laying on my stomach in a comfortable bed. Clutching a large pillow that oddly smells like Eric. Eric. I startle as I realize that Eric is across the room, making some kind of breakfast. In a nauseous rush, the night comes flooding back to me. I'm in Eric's apartment. Eric helped me last night after the attack. Tom attacked me. I feel my back and neck throbbing. My right arm is stiff against my side. I groan, sitting up, an action that makes me really want to puke. Eric glances over to me, and my face flushes slightly as I remember the dream I'd just been having. Hopefully he thinks its just a flush from the pain.

I go to stand up, and the nerves in my back explode. I steady myself against the wall, getting used to the feeling of standing. I feel like Eric is watching my expression from across the room. He's not going to baby me. He might have helped me last night, but he's all Dauntless leader this morning. I shuffle to the bathroom, taking tiny little steps to get there. Even though I saw what I looked like last night, I'm not prepared for the shock of looking in the mirror this morning.

My arm isn't as bad as it was. It's stiff, but there's just a faint patch of purple and yellow. The blood has been cleaned off from all of my cuts, so they are more like just raised lines. My neck is pretty brutal looking. You can almost see the pattern of fingers there. It looks worse than it feels, which is saying something. The cuts on my legs aren't horrible. I know the worst part is my back, but I can't see it. I can definitely feel it. I run my fingers through my hair, trying to straighten it out. I jump when Eric walks into the bathroom behind me, appearing suddenly in the mirror. He's holding a stack of black clothing.

"I got some clothes from Tris this morning." He steps close to me to help me again as he did last night. It's more than I would expect from him, but I'm afraid of looking weak. Eric notices my expression reflected to him in the mirror.

"A brave man knows when to ask for help." He intones quietly. It must be some Dauntless phrase. He's essentially giving me permission to let him help me. I'm in no position to refuse. Eric carefully helps me step into the pants as I hold on to his shoulders for balance. They fit me better than anything else here has.

"Do you want one of these shirts?" He asks, holding up a few. I shake my head, a motion that I regret immediately, because it hurts.

"I don't think I can lift my arms up." I state. Eric nods, his blue eyes unreadable. He takes another step toward me.

"Let me see how bad it is." He slowly lifts up the edge of the shirt to look at my back. His face hardens, and again I know it must be bad for him to pity me. I bite my lip.

"What's it look like?" I croak, my voice still a little harsh. He doesn't answer at first, his eyes fixated on the bruises. He drops the shirt.

"It looks like you jumped off of the train onto concrete and landed on your back." Eric's voice is dark, and I briefly wonder if Tom is dead yet. I also wonder why it bothers Eric so much. I know he hates Tom, but I also thought he hated me._ But then, why would he help me?_ It's a confusing swirl of emotions that I'm not quite ready to make sense of yet. He leaves the bathroom to give me a minute. I tie the bottom of his shirt up, so that it doesn't hang so low on my figure.

When I make my way back into the apartment, Eric has breakfast out. There's a glass of orange juice for me, and a plate of bacon and toast for him. I want to ask how he knows I only drink orange juice every morning, but I don't. I'm not sure of anything anymore. I'm able to walk over to the table somewhat normally, though its quite painful. Eric sits stoically, drinking a cup of coffee and take a few bites out of his breakfast occasionally. He simply studies me as I take small sips. It makes me a bit uncomfortable. No matter how grateful I am to him, he's still intimidating.

"Do you want me to have him removed from Dauntless?" I'm forced to look up at Eric when his voice pierces me back into reality. His face is impassive. I take another sip before answering.

"No." I state, surprising myself. Somehow I've come to this conclusion. Eric's face doesn't react, but I swear that his body tensed up for a moment.

"I don't want to look afraid." I continue, setting down my glass. I've sure of my resolve. If I had Tom kicked out, people would know that I was afraid of him. And I doubt the true story of what happened would come out. They would just assume that I was sleeping around with Eric, and asked him to get rid of Tom. Eric just stares back at me. Of anyone, I know he would understand not wanting to look weak.

"But, if the chance arises to make him pay…" I trail off, and Eric's face lights up into a forbidding grin. It's a bit scary. We finish up the rest of our breakfast in silence. I'm not sure exactly what to say in this situation. I doubt Eric wants me to give him a teary speech of thanks. He breaks the silence first.

"Okay greenie, time to get moving." I want to roll my eyes. So much for the whole greenie thing. I'd thought that maybe he'd stop calling me that after last night. We start walking to the simulation rooms. He walks slower than usual so that I can shuffle alongside him.

"Shiloh." There's a light voice behind us, calling out to me. Tris runs up behind us, her blonde ponytail swinging across her back. Eric waits until she catches up.

"I'm going to go ahead to talk to Four about something." He gives me one last look, checking my expression, before leaving us. I watch for a moment as he walks away, his hands clenched into fists. I hope he's really going to find Four, and not to seek out Tom. Tris falls into step with me.

"Are you okay? Eric didn't tell me what happened, just that you were hurt." Her eyes are traveling over my arm, and then at my neck. I take a deep breath, which is painful.

"I'll be okay. I, um. Well when I left you guys last night…" I trail off, embarrassed. I'm not really ready to speak about the exact details of what happened. Tris speaks softly, already catching on.

"Who was it?" I stop for a minute, stalling a bit. It's not like I want to go and face Tom this morning.

"Tom." I choke out, my voice cracking a bit. Tris nods, unsurprised. I guess his behavior towards me didn't go unnoticed.

"Tris, what do I do? I told Eric I didn't want him thrown out, but I'm not sure I can face him." For the first time, I feel like I might cry. My chest feels empty. Tris sighs.

"Something very similar happened to me. But the motivation was different. They just wanted to get rid of me. So I pretended like I was scared, so they wouldn't see me as a threat anymore. But you were attacked for a different reason. As for your friends, you can tell them that you spent the night at my apartment. For Tom, I think you need to act like you're unafraid of him. He wants you to be weak, and you've got to show him you're not. And you're not, Shiloh. Most girls would have had him thrown out. Most girls wouldn't be facing him today." She pauses, a light smile playing on her lips.

"And no girls would have spent the night in Eric's apartment." I laugh. She does have a point. We continue walking, and she gives me a reassuring touch on the shoulder when we reach the simulation hallway. Tom is not here yet, but my friends are, clustered together in a worried group.

"Shiloh!" Felix spots me first, and he jogs over to me. His eyes widen in horror at my appearance. He reaches out a hand, as if to touch my neck, but draws it back quickly. The other four have rushed over as well, and wear similar expressions.

"What happened to you? We were so worried this morning when you weren't in the dorm, and we haven't seen Tom. We asked Four, but he just said you were fine. He wouldn't tell us anything else." The words tumble out of Jena's mouth like she can't stop them. Hazel is staring at my neck with her mouth over her hand. I gather my words, trying to figure out how to explain what happened. I decide to leave out Eric's involvement completely, knowing that it would only add to the confusion.

"Well, I was walking back to the dorm from the Pit, and Tom was there. He grabbed me and-" I stop suddenly as Tom walks into the room. Or slinks in, more likely. His right eye is covered in a heavy bruise, and so swollen that I doubt he can see out of it. His left arm is wrapped up in a cast. Eric bruised his face like that, and broke his arm, in a matter of seconds.

"Shiloh, did _you_ do that to him?" Cam asks incredulously. I know he doesn't really think that I had anything to do with Tom's appearance this morning. Brent's veins are popping out of his neck, and I expect he would go over and take on Tom if he wasn't already in a pitiful condition. I shake my head at Cam.

"No, someone found us just in time. I don't know who it was, it was so fast, and he ran after Tom. I just ran back to the Pit, where Tris found me, and she took care of me." I feel guilty lying to them, but I never showed aptitude for Candor. I've got to do what I can to keep myself safe. I don't have time to lie anymore, because the trainers have come out of the simulation rooms. I watch as Eric's eyes find Tom. He grips the doorframe, like he's holding himself back. Tom doesn't look up, or anywhere for that matter. He simply sits with Paige, staring at the ground. Four's looking at him with revulsion too, but he starts calling out names.

"Okay, so let's have Hazel with Tris, Tom with me, and Shiloh with Eric." I want to strangle Tom, because he looks relieved that he's not going with Eric. That's when I realize, I'm not afraid of him at this moment. I'm angry. I make my way into the simulation room, wincing as I have to lay on my back in the chair. Eric is back to business, hooking me up to the electrodes. He doesn't speak. I remember that I need to focus on being Dauntless in my simulations, so no one suspects that I'm Divergent. Eric turns to me, the needle with the simulation serum in hand. He brushes away my hair from my neck, and I'm reminded of his similar actions last night. I feel the prick of the needle, and see Eric's blue eyes staring into mine before the simulation begins.

**Eric's POV**

"Really, you're afraid of spiders greenie? Spiders?" Shiloh's trying to sit up, struggling against the pain in her back. I can't stand to look at her neck. I'm honestly surprised I haven't killed that fucker yet. I would have last night, if Shiloh hadn't needed me. I would have gone after the piece of shit and ripped him limb from limb. But now I can't. She asked me not to. In a way, I understand her reasoning. But that doesn't mean I feel good about it. She grimaces as she finally stands up fully. Even bruised and disheveled, she's still beautiful. The fact that she's wearing my shirt doesn't hurt, either.

"Yeah, you would be too if you had grown up in Amity. Those things get huge out in the fields." She shudders, and I hold in a smile. Her blonde hair is falling across her face, obstructing her eyes, and I feel the urge to push it away. At that moment, she registers the screaming coming from the next room over, and gives me a questioning look. I shrug.

"I may have asked Four to give the bastard a little extra fear serum." She smiles, and there's nothing else in the world like Shiloh smiling at me.

"How long was I under?" She questions as we walk toward the door. I frown. She was unusually fast.

"Four minutes and sixteen seconds." I tell her. Shiloh nods, but I can't detect any emotion from her face. We reach the door, and I lightly touch her shoulder.

"Shiloh." The sound of her name coming from my lips, and not greenie, makes her stop dead. She tilts her head to the side.

"Stick with your friends. Do not go anywhere by yourself, okay?" My voice is gruff again. I open the door, and send her out.

…

After the simulation tests, the initiates have the rest of the day off. I have to resist the urge follow Shiloh. She'll be okay with her friends. She's already becoming more comfortable with me, and that's more than I could ask for. I don't know how to do all of this. There's the possibility of asking Four for advice, but I don't want to cross that bridge until I get there. Don't want to give the smartass the satisfaction.

Instead of following Shiloh around, I head back to my apartment, thinking about the look on Tom's face when he had left the simulation room. It would take him a few days to recover. That was the closest to revenge I was going to get at the moment, so I was going to relish it. To my surprise and annoyance, Tris is standing outside my apartment door. I have no idea how she got here so fast.

"What do you want stiff?" I snap. She rolls her eyes. She should fucking know that I'm not in the mood to talk.

"I want to talk to you." She asserts, a serious look in her eyes. Great, I'm not going to get out of this.

"Okay, but make it quick, I didn't sleep well." Tris raises her eyebrows, a mischievous look on her face. I groan.

"Not that way stiff. Not that _you_ would know anything about _that._" That wipes the smug look off of her face, and she flushes a bit. I will never let her or Four live that fear down. She follows me into my apartment.

"I want to know what you're going to do to protect Shiloh." I blink at her. Haven't I already done enough? Tris sighs.

"You're not going to let her sleep in the dorm near him, are you?" I scowl. I hadn't thought that through. I had only thought through a few scenarios, most of which ended with Tom having an accident, or getting cut from Dauntless because Four was spiking up his fear serum.

"Can't she stay with you?" I ask her, my heart racing. I would _love_ for Shiloh to stay with me, but that would surely get the rumor mill going. After she became Dauntless was one thing…

"Well, she could, but, maybe surprising to you, Four and I do need some privacy." I make a gagging noise. She ignores me, continuing.

"Besides, I think she'd feel safer here. We could just tell people she was staying with me." I nod, trying to act nonchalant about the whole thing. Tris heads out of the room, but before she leaves, she turns to me.

"You know, she might just be the best thing that could've happened to you. Hopefully you don't fuck it up." I growl at her, and she leaves, a smile on her lips. Fuck. I head over to my bed, ready to take a nice nap before dinner, something I rarely, if ever, do. The bed still smells like her.

…..

When I walk into the dining hall, I immediately search the room for Shiloh. I find her with the usual group. She's not eating much, merely picking at her plate. Her friends look a bit solemn. I check the room for Tom, and find him slouched at his table, his eyes dead. He deserves much worse. Four and Tris sit with Uriah and Marlene. I take a seat next to Four. He gestures toward Tom, a vengeful smirk on his face. I simply nod back, the corners of my eyes focused on Shiloh, hardly tasting my meal.

The trainers finish, and most of them head to the Pit. Tris and I wait in the hallway, knowing that Shiloh will come this way. I also guess that she'll come by herself, ignoring my advice. She'll want time to think to herself. I'm proven right when a few minutes later she rounds the corner. I step out to meet her, and she immediately stiffens, her face frozen in fear. I immediately realize my mistake. Tom had hidden in the shadows of a hallway to. Fucking idiot. I don't move a muscle, and Tris stands still, her eyes flickering between the two of us. After a minute, her body relaxes, but her breathing is still shallow. I want to kick myself. She walks over to us, her eyes worried.

"I…I don't know if I can stay in the same room as him." She admits to Tris, looking down at the ground. She's afraid, but she's also ashamed of being afraid. I could kill that fucker. I want to run down into the dining hall and kill him right there. I focus on Shiloh instead.

"Tris thinks you should stay with me. And you can tell people you're staying with her." I gesture to Tris, who kind of grimaces at my tone. The invitation doesn't come out as warmly as I'd hoped. Still, Shiloh's considering me, her eyes studying my face. She looks from Tris, and back to me.

"Okay. Thank you." I'm a little bit surprised, but try not to let it show. Tris gently takes Shiloh's good arm.

"Come on, I'll walk with you to the dorm so you can get some stuff, and we can tell your friends. I can guard the shower for you too." Shiloh nods, and heads down the hallway with Tris. For the third time, I'm thankful for Tris. Maybe Four isn't such an idiot after all.

**Shiloh's POV**

I feel a little better now that I've showered. Tris had packed up the little clothes and makeup I owned, and stood guard outside of the bathroom. I had lied to my friends again, but thankfully, they had understood, giving me careful hugs before we had left. Tris drops me off at Eric's door.

"If you need anything, you know where to find me." She murmurs, pointing a little ways down the hallway. Eric opens the door.

"Thank you." I tell Tris as Eric shuts the door behind us. I get one last glimpse of her face. Now that I'm more awake, I have the chance to really take a look around his apartment. Unsurprisingly, there isn't a ton of stuff, but what is there is nice. I walk across the room, setting my bag down on the floor, and turn to find Eric watching me.

"I'm just, uh, going to get changed." I mutter, heading towards the bathroom. Once there, I stare at myself in the mirror. What is wrong with me? Someone looking at me shouldn't give me a pit in my stomach. I need to pull it together. I change into a pair of shorts and a tank top, which allows my bruised neck and arm to be thrown into full view.

Eric is sitting in a chair when I come out of the bathroom. He's wearing what must be his sleeping attire, though there's not much of it. Just a pair of shorts and nothing else. I try not to stare at his chest, but I didn't know truly how strong he was until now. I stand awkwardly, not sure what to do.

"Where am I sleeping?" I ask him, looking around the room for a cot or something. He snorts.

"In the bed." He answers, like I'm stupid for thinking otherwise. He doesn't even glance my way. I feel my face getting hot.

"No, you can't sleep on the floor, or in that chair, again." Eric turns to me, his eyes stony, and I immediately shut up. I guess it isn't open for debate. His eyes are closed, ready for sleep. I crawl into the bed, watching him. The words escape my lips before I can stop myself.

"I mean, I can stay over on one side, and this bed is big enough that you don't have to be near me." I want to take the words back instantly. He's going to kill me. Eric looks over at me, an appraising look on his face. He shrugs, and makes his way over to me. I roll over, a painful idea, but I don't need to be any more awkward. The bed shifts a bit as he climbs in, but its big enough that we're still pretty far apart. I lay on my stomach, facing away from him, and let myself drift away.

**What did you think? :) Leave a review!**


	12. Chapter 12

_So so so so sorry that it has taken a week! I tried to give you guys an extra long chapter since it's been so long. I'm finally done with exams though! Yay! Some thanks to PugLover2525, licia33, , Black Opal Coven, __coeurdetenebre__, jamiep6, wisegirlindisguise and The Guardian Raven, and as always, thanks to all of you who read and review!_

XII

**Eric's POV**

I blink a couple of times when I wake up to make sure I'm not still asleep. I definitely remember crawling into the same bed as Shiloh last night. I remember her edging as far away from me as she could. I _don't _recall her draping herself across my chest, which is something that I feel like I would remember, had I been awake for it. _Fuck. _She must have rolled over in her sleep. Her head is laying against my shoulder, blonde hair tickling against my arms, and her arms are resting on my bare skin. Her left hand lays flat against my chest. She's laying right up against me, and it's definitely not helping my imagination having her this close. I would stay, and let her wake up like this, just to see her blush. I've noticed that she flushes easily lately. However there are other problems at hand, certain _morning_ problems. Problems which are not being helped by my vivid imagination. Besides, she needs to rest.

I slowly ease myself up, letting Shiloh fall against the bed. Luckily she doesn't wake. She simply grips the pillow with her arms, and sighs. I watch her for a moment, before turning towards the bathroom. Normally I would work out, but I don't feel comfortable leaving Shiloh alone. I wouldn't want her to wake up by herself. I have plenty of time this morning, because training is going to start a little later than usual. The initiates aren't going through a fear simulation today, instead, we are taking them on a field trip to the fence. Some of them might end up working there. Some of them named Tom might end up working there if he's so lucky to make it past initiation alive. Doubtful at the moment.

When I emerge from the shower, fully dressed for the day, Shiloh is just waking up. I can tell it takes her a minute to place her surroundings. Her tank top hangs off of her shoulder, so her tattoo is fully visible. The bruising on her neck is also fully visible. It's not much better than it was yesterday. Every time I see her bruises, I flashback to the scene in the hallway. I clench my jaw. Now is not the time to be getting angry. She glances around the room, and finds me, her silver eyes wide. I see understanding flood her eyes.

"Sleep well?" I ask as I head into the kitchen. I know my voice sounds cold, but that's just the way I am. When I glance back over at her, there's a light flush on her face. She doesn't realize the position we were in this morning, but still, she's embarrassed. I try not grin. It _was_ her idea that we both sleep in the same bed. It's not like I'm embarrassed by that; if I had it my way, we would never leave the bed…

"Good actually. No nightmares last night at least." Her soft voice jerks me out of some very nice daydreams. Shiloh starts to pull herself out of bed, wincing a bit. I frown. I didn't realize she had been having nightmares. I should have realized though. If I'm having flashbacks, then surely she is. Bastard. I busy myself with getting a glass of water, trying to keep my eyes off of Shiloh for a few seconds. She makes her way into the bathroom with a change of clothes, and I have some peace, at least for a moment or two. When she emerges, she's dressed in tight black pants and a tight black top. Like yesterday, I try my hardest not to stare, but it's nearly impossible. Her face is irresistible. So I might as well take in as much as I can.

There's not a flaw in her face, as far as I'm concerned. Her eyes are such a light grey, but if you look closely there are flecks of green there as well. She has full, pink lips, which are so inviting. Extremely inviting. _Fuck._

"Ready to go?" I question. She nods, and we head to the door to go to the dining hall for breakfast. We walk in silence, but it's not an awkward silence. She's walking better today. I try not to take too many glances at her.

**Shiloh's POV**

It's weird that I'm becoming more comfortable around Eric. Sure, he still scares the crap out of me, but I no longer think he's going to try and throw me out of Dauntless. At least not at the moment. His anger is directed at Tom right now. I even kind of like being around him, because I feel safe, something I never would have thought I'd feel around Eric.

_Be honest Shiloh. You know why you really like being around him._ I tell my inner voice to shut up. He does make me feel safe, that's not a lie. Okay, so it's obvious that I'm attracted to him, at least physically. I can admit that to myself. Why wouldn't I be attracted to him that way? Though, I never do see girls around him like I do around Uriah or some of the other young, single guys. Maybe it's because he is so intimidating. And kind of mean.

I take a glance at him. He is exactly what a Dauntless leader should be; strong, tough, and menacing. At least on the outside. But the way he's helped me lately, I can tell there's something else besides that. It may not be warm and fuzzy, but it's something else.

When we reach the outside of the dining hall, he stops, and I stop with him. His icy blue eyes meet mine, and I can feel the inside of my stomach bouncing. I want to slap myself. Act normal. Don't let a pair of biceps get you all in a flutter.

"Be careful. Stay with your friends." Eric commands, leaving no room for an alternate course. I know he's referring to last night, when I was about to walk to the dorm by myself. He gestures for me to go first. I take a deep breath, and walk in quickly. Thankfully, Tris isn't here yet, so it won't look weird, since I'm supposed to be staying with her. We might need to coordinate our arrival times. I find my way to my friends, sitting down next to Sam. Eric doesn't enter the dining hall for a few minutes, giving us more cover. If anyone suspects something is afoot, they don't mention it.

I feel like ever since he saved me from Tom and helped me, I'm more aware of Eric. Not that it's hard to be aware of the threatening Dauntless leader. But it's like I can see everything he does, just out of the corner of my eye. Him piling breakfast on his plate. Conversing with Four. I have to consciously focus on the conversation in front of me, because it's a bit uncomfortable, like my nerves are in a wreck.

"How was staying with Tris?" Jena questions, sliding a glass of orange juice in front of me. I take a long gulp before answering, trying to think of a suitable answer. More lying. Some friend I am.

"It's kind of weird, since she's one of our trainers, but it's better than staying in the dorm with Tom." I reply, hoping that it comes off as sincere. Hazel nods, pulling her black hair back into a low bun.

"Where do you think we're going today?" Cam asks, chewing on a piece of bacon. Pierce is devouring a few dozen sausage patties. He's lucky that Dauntless constantly exercise, because otherwise he would balloon out in a matter of days. I'm always surprised when I see that he hasn't exploded overnight.

"Maybe Eric's going to make us jump off some skyscrapers or something." Sam jokes, stealing a patty from Pierce's plate. It hardly makes a dent in the large stack, but Pierce still looks offended. Natasha rolls her eyes at the boys. My eyes catch Tom as he skulks into the dining hall with Paige. He looks recovered from yesterday's fear simulation, though his right eye is still swollen, which makes his face far less handsome, and his arm still in a cast. Pierce flashes a wide grin at the sight of him.

"I want to know who did that to him and give them a medal." I smile as Tom and Paige sit down at a table with some other Dauntless-born. Paige still looks a bit shaken up from the fear simulations. So far, it takes her longer than the rest of us. Four did say that this phase was more important than the physical, so maybe Paige won't make the cut.

When we see the trainers starting to finish up and leave, we quickly push our way out of the table to follow after them. A field trip is exciting, _even _if it might mean jumping off of skyscrapers. Which actually, is probably some sort of Dauntless activity. I walk with Felix, who keeps glancing over his back. Watching for Tom I expect. I'm grateful for that. We find ourselves outside, near the train. I wonder how they get it to stop running here during the day, because it's supposed to run constantly except for brief stops at night. I would guess that Eric has something to do with it. Five end compartments are open, and Eric, Four, Tris, Marlene, and Uriah stand waiting. Once everyone has arrived, Four steps forward.

"Initiates, today we are going out to the fence. Some of you may end up working to guard the city there. Climbing up to the top takes some time. Since there are fifteen of you, we are going to separate you into groups of three, and each group is going to look at a different section of the fence." Everyone is glancing around a bit nervously. Most of them have probably only been to the fence one time; the day of the choosing ceremony. I have lived near it my whole life. Watching the specks of Dauntless soldiers patrol the platforms.

"Okay. Uriah is going to take Brent, Tally, and Trent." Brent walks over to Uriah with two unfamiliar Dauntless-born. They could be brother and sister, both with dark, straight hair and unsmiling faces. Brent eyes them warily.

"Marlene will take Cam, Natasha, and Lily." Jena looks a bit unhappy that Cam is going to be with two girls, plus the pretty Marlene. Personally, I don't think she has anything to worry about. Knowing how Cam is with her, that is.

"Hazel, Paige, and Jena, go with Tris." Jena and Hazel eye Paige as they make their way over to Tris.

"I'll take Pierce, Porter, and Tom." Four's eyes narrow a bit as he says Tom's name, but I doubt anyone other than me notices. I'm guessing he wanted to take Pierce and Porter as insurance. Porter is about the same size as Felix, with pale skin and dark curls.

"So that leaves Felix, Sam, and Shiloh with Eric." I wonder if anyone else has noticed how much I get paired up with Eric. At least today I know it isn't because Four is trying to torture Eric, but because Four knows I'll feel safer with him around. It's amazing how much has changed over the course of a few days. Felix, Sam, and I follow Eric to the last compartment, waving goodbye to everyone else as they enter their own compartments. Felix and Sam are chattering excitedly as the train begins to move underneath us. I take a peek at Eric. He stands by the open door, watching as the city passes by. His massive arms lean against the frame of the door, the black tattoos like a maze across them. Sam breaks me out of my reverie.

"You must have been near the fence a bunch of times, right Shiloh?" Sam's eyes are much darker than Eric's, almost navy. He really does remind me of Cole.

"Not really. I mean, we obviously saw it everyday when we went to school, and in the fields, but we're not supposed to go near it. There's no rules about it, but…" I trail off, and Sam nods, understanding. I guess all the factions have some things that are just understood, but not necessarily rules.

It doesn't take us long to get to the fence. The train now runs parallel to it, slowing a bit. I make my way over to Eric, glancing out of the door. The first group jumps out, Uriah screaming in delight. I guess it never really gets old. Felix and Sam crowd in front of me, laughing as they watch the other groups get off with various states of enthusiasm.

"Right here." Eric points out of the door, and Felix and Sam jump together, shouting loudly. Sam tumbles over on the ground, and my body tenses. I'd forgotten how rough jumping off of the train is. If I land wrong, like on my back, I could be done for. Maybe I should just stay in the train. I've seen the fence from afar plenty of times. Before I can mention this idea to Eric, he's picked me up easily, cradling me against his chest. I grip his shoulders.

"I won't let you fall." His voice is gruff, and I feel him launch us out into the air. I don't see anything, because I've clenched my eyes shut. He lands on his feet smoothly, like he was born to jump out of trains, and sets me down on my feet. Thankfully, Sam and Felix were too busy rolling around on the ground like idiots to notice. Eric marches over to the edge of the fence, leaving us in the dust of the train. I grab Felix's arm, and drag him along like a mother dragging her child through the market, Sam following behind sheepishly.

Even though I've lived near this monstrous structure, I've never been so close as to walk all the way up it. It's much taller than I thought. And there's no way up other than the stairs. It's not like Dauntless would use an elevator if they had the choice of stairs. We're overlooking an Amity farm, but far away from the compound. I can see a few Amity workers in the distance, but they're not close enough that I would be able to recognize anyone. Eric stops and turns around abruptly once we've reached the very bottom of the fence. I quickly let go of Felix.

"We're going all the way to the top. Take your time, and don't overdo it. If you get tired, you get left behind." His eyes quickly flash to me, and I wonder if he would leave me behind. Until recently, I would have said yes. Now, I'm not so sure. Still, it's Eric, so I better not take any chances.

Eric lets Sam and Felix go ahead of him, and they gleefully start up the stairs. I remind myself to watch how much sugar they're ingesting in the morning. It's not so bad if you don't go too fast. After about ten minutes though, my back is really starting to hurt. I grit my teeth and keep pushing, trailing a few steps after Felix. Eric climbs silently behind me. I'm surprised he hasn't made any comments about my progress yet. Occasionally, we pass by a Dauntless soldier. They never speak to us; they just nod to Eric and turn back to watch outside the fence.

We finally reach the top, and I let out a long breath. I lean against the railing as we all take in the view. Amity farms stretch out in front of us, the workers tiny dots on the ground. It's not too hot of a day, and there's a light breeze at the top. Eric gestures along the fence.

"We are always on alert here. If you work here, you will keep watch either all day or all night. We built this fence because some cities did not fully recover after the collapse. We don't know if they will ever be a threat to us, but we must be prepared." Felix is staring wide-eyed into the distance, no doubt imagining the horror of other cities attacking us.

"You have thirty minutes to roam around. Do not bother the soldiers. They are armed, and they will shoot you if you annoy them too much. Meet me back here. If you aren't back, I'm leaving without you, and you can get a ride back to Dauntless at the end of the day with the soldiers." Felix and Sam instantly turn to walk along the platforms.

"Coming Shiloh?" Felix calls over his shoulder. Sam stops, turning around completely. I shake my head at them, rubbing my back lightly.

"You guys go ahead. I need to rest my back." They frown, but trod ahead excitedly. I sit down on the stairs, leaning my back against the metal. I'm surprised when Eric joins me. He sits rather close to me, close enough that I can inhale his scent. The scent that I've been smelling at night. I stare out at the Amity farms, wishing that I didn't feel his body next to mine so much. I'm not used to feeling like this.

"You don't miss it, do you?" Eric's voice snaps me back to reality. I face him, watching his eyebrows raise in amusement. His voice had gone back to containing the normal sarcastic bite.

"No. I mean, I do wish I could see my brother. But I would never live there again. You can only be so happy all the time." I keep my voice even. I miss my brother, but I'm not going to get emotional over it. Not in front of Eric.

"No. You couldn't live there again. You're Dauntless now." He says roughly. He's leaning forward, resting his arms on his knees. I stretch my legs out, trying to stretch my back more.

"Well, technically, I'm not Dauntless yet. I've still got to pass initiation." I reply lightly. Eric snorts, crossing his arms. We don't speak for a few minutes. That is, until I ask something without thinking.

"What faction were you from? Or were you Dauntless-born?" As soon as I say it, I want to crawl inside my skin. Idiot. I can't keep the grimace off of my face. I'm thinking he's going to be pissed. Eric doesn't reply, and I chance a look at him. He's watching me, and oddly, there's almost a sad look on his face.

"You don't have to be afraid of me Shiloh." His voice is strangely low. Again he's called me by my actual name. I contemplate him for a moment, thinking about how I should answer.

"I'm not afraid of you. You can just be scary." I tell him honestly. There's actually a difference. Eric gives me an odd look, but accepts it.

"I was an Erudite transfer." He tells me in a sharp breath. I know I'm not going to get anything else out of him for the moment. Eric doesn't exactly share personal information. I nod, tapping my fingers to my chin. I had almost guessed it, because everything he does is so calculated. I think back to when he conned Tom into fighting Peter. Definitely an Erudite move. Eric stands up, stretching his arms over his head.

"Would you have really thrown Tom out?" The words hang above us in the air. I'm past the point of worrying whether or not my questions are going to bother him. Eric stares at me, his eyes hardening. Whether this is due to my questioning him, or the mention of Tom, I'm not sure.

"Is this twenty questions or something greenie?" He barks out. So we're back to the greenie thing. I don't drop my gaze this time, hoping I look somewhat serious. I know I have no chance of looking intimidating to him. Eric grinds his teeth together.

"Without question." His voice is gravelly, like sandpaper rubbing against itself. I exhale deeply. Goosebumps cover my arms as I shiver. I stand up, facing Eric.

"Thank you." He doesn't reply, but his eyes aren't quite so mean. I hear the sound of footsteps, and Sam and Felix pop around the corner, wide grins on their faces.

"Have fun? You didn't break anything, did you?" I ask them, shaking my head slightly. They both start speaking at the same time.

"Shiloh it was-" "Oh you should have-" "You can see all of Amity-" "Why didn't you-" Eric snorts, and I hold in a smile.

"Start making your way back down. I need to speak with a soldier for a moment." Eric directs us back down the stairs, stalking off across the platform. I wonder why he didn't do that while we were sitting, but don't ponder it for too long. I don't pretend to understand Eric. Felix immediately bounds down the stairs, leaving Sam to walk slowly with me.

"So, did Eric bother you much?" Sam queries, raising one eyebrow in concern. I'd forgotten that no one knows what Eric has done for me. As far as everyone else is concerned, nothing has changed between us.

"Just called me greenie, insulted me, you know, the usual." I retort, hoping it sounds credible. Sam grins. I stop for a second, to rest my back. Sam stops with me.

"You don't have to stay with me Sam, it's okay, I know I'm lagging." He hesitates, a funny look on his face. I'm about to ask him what's wrong. That's when Sam leans down, touching my shoulders, and kisses me. At first, I'm too shocked to move. It's not a bad kiss; he's surprisingly gentle for a Dauntless. But everything about it just feels…wrong. Like our lips don't match up right, and I keep thinking about my brother. Not exactly what you want to be thinking about while you're kissing someone. Before I can make a move to pull away, Sam does, and his face looks exactly how I feel. I bite my lip awkwardly.

"Er, so, I thought that I just had to do that, and not regret it, but uh…" Sam says, rubbing the back of his head. We both laugh. He continues, "That didn't…just no, right?" I nod, thankful that he gets it. That he feels the same. We keep walking, chuckling a bit, and by chance I look over my shoulder. Eric is standing there, contemplating us. He saw and heard everything. At first, I think he looks angry. But when he catches my eye, he smirks, with a clear message written across his face. The kind of message that says 'I told you so' and he did tell me so when we were playing capture the flag. I stick my tongue out at him childishly, and turn back to the stairs. We make it down to the bottom, where Felix is waiting.

"What took you guys so long?" Felix asks, bouncing on his toes. Since we've started initiation, Felix has put on a good amount of muscle, and he's really gotten in shape. He doesn't look a bit tired. Sam and I don't reply, just grin awkwardly at each other. Felix tilts his head in confusion. Eric bounds down the stairs, pushing past us. I can see the train looming in the distance.

**Eric's POV**

By the time we've gotten back to Dauntless, I've mostly gotten the image of Sam and Shiloh kissing out of my head. Mostly. My only respite is that it _clearly _didn't work for either of them. Poor bastard. However, it does make me nervous, because Sam certainly won't be the last to make a move as long as Shiloh is unattached. Fuck. I haven't even figured out what I want, and I absolutely have no idea what to do even if I did figure that out. I do know that I don't want to see her with anyone else. Which I guess means that I want her with me. But would that make me her _boyfriend?_ The word doesn't seem right to attach to myself.

Shiloh went to the Pit with her friends until dinner time, so I don't have to worry about her right now, and I have some time to myself. As much as I hate to stomach the idea, I think it's time to talk to Four. I wander around Dauntless for about an hour, trying to put off this encounter for as long as possible. But I can't see any other solution. I have no concept of how to handle this.

I make my way to Four's apartment, knocking briskly on the door. Four opens, and a flicker of bewilderment crosses over his face. I don't make a habit of visiting him. He moves aside to let me in. Tris is sitting on a couch, and she looks up as I walk in.

"I need to speak to Four alone." I snap at her. She cocks her head to the side, a clear look of defiance. Four rubs his forehead, stepping in between us, a passive look on his face.

"You know I'll just tell her anything you say." He argues. Fucker. I know he will. I run my hands over my hair. Tris's face lights up, and I groan.

"This is about Shiloh, isn't it?!" She exclaims excitedly, leaning forward. Four looks back and forth between us quickly. I grimace at her, wishing she wasn't so astute. The look that comes upon Four's face makes me want to claw his eyes out. It's every time I mocked him about his relationship with Tris, every time I laughed about Tris's intimacy fear, all rolled up into one large simpering smile.

"Just help me. I have no fucking idea what I'm doing, and I don't need you two stiffs fucking with me." I roar, using a voice I usually save for the initiates. My outburst has no effect on them, but Four does gesture for me to sit down.

"I think that Tris will actually be helpful in this situation." He comments, trying to pull his face back into a mask of indifference. I hiss, but don't say anything, because I know he's right. Four and Tris are exchanging little glances of glee, and it's making me nauseous. They start arguing about my course of action.

"He should just keep things going the way they are, but maybe drop some hints here and there. Try and get to know her better." Four is saying. Tris shakes her head.

"No, he's too intimidating. He needs to start being nicer. Show her a romantic side." I scowl at her. She knows that's not going to happen. Four laughs, the hysteria in his voice crackling through.

"If she wanted someone soft and nice, she would already be dating Felix. You fell for me despite how un-sensitive I am." He counters. I feel like this has been a big mistake. I didn't come here to hear about their relationship.

"SO WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO?" I yell at them, jumping up from my seat. Tris smiles at me, the amusement evident on her face.

"Just keep going, and…" She pauses, looking to Four. Four turns to me, a very serious look on his face, a look that I don't trust. He finishes her sentence.

"Don't fuck up."

**Review please? :) So, we're getting somewhere, eh? But I feel like Eric is going to want to make sure Tom is out of the picture before things really develop. ;)**


	13. Chapter 13

_As usual, some more thanks to give to CapraParsay, kmcgeezy, and mariiiiaaa! Please note, this chapter is continuing on the same day as the previous :) This chapter is kinda just a nice light chapter. I thought Shiloh deserved somewhat of a break. Also, the Peter character is slightly book, and slightly Miles Teller, who I've come to really like through seeing his interviews._

XIII

The Pit is easily my favorite place in Dauntless. The cool stone walls, the ever-present trickling of the Chasm, and the bursts of people. There always seems to be so much activity here. Natasha, Hazel, Jena, and I have decided to ditch the boys and go shopping. Jena's idea, naturally. I haven't really even been able to talk to them lately, so I'm grateful for the girl time. I need to talk a little bit about the whole Tom incident. I'm also grateful to not have to be around Sam, because we've been politely avoiding each other since we got back to Dauntless.

"So, how are you Shiloh?" Natasha asks as we enter a store. The store is lit much like the tattoo parlor, with dark red and blue lights, making her green eyes look strange. There's a cadence of music echoing throughout the walls, and rows of cabinets holding makeup and other beauty products. I'm surprised that the store isn't packed. We find a rack of clothing and start perusing through the mass of black.

"I'm…okay. Relieved that I'm not sleeping near Tom, but I miss being able to talk to Jena and Hazel in the mornings and nights." I confide. This much is the truth. But there is so much more that I feel I can't digress yet. I'm questioning what I can tell them. As every hour passes, I get more and more worried at Tom's silence. Sure, he could be desperately afraid of another confrontation with Eric. With a broken arm and black eye, I would be. Perhaps he even suspects Four's involvement with the fear serum and his simulations, and doesn't want to risk his place in Dauntless. Still, I would be a fool to feel completely safe. Tom may simply be biding his time. I don't believe he's just going to forget about everything that has happened. I know he would want to get revenge if he could.

Then, there's the other small matter with Eric. That is easily the biggest lie that I'm keeping, apart from my Divergence. Even if I could tell them that I'm staying with him instead of Tris, I'm not sure I would. It feels…too personal. Plus, then I might reveal some of those thoughts I've been having about Eric, and I'm not sure if _I'm_ even ready to confront those, let alone tell anyone. I do have something that I can tell them that they will find interesting, so I speak quickly to change the subject.

"Sam kissed me today." Hazel drops the dress she's holding in shock, her mouth gaping. Natasha smiles widely, as if she knew this would happen. She probably did. All the while, Jena gets a smug look on her face.

"See Shiloh, I told you he liked you! What was it like?" Jena exclaims, doing a happy dance around me. I flick her long, black ponytail, watching as it swings back and forth. Natasha and Hazel inch in to listen more closely.

"Weird. For both of us. It's just not going to happen." I tell them, shaking my head. Hazel nods, like she understands completely, while Jena and Natasha look disappointed. I can see that they want to argue with me, so I hastily change the subject again.

"But how are things going with your boys?" I demand, hoping that the subject of their boyfriends will keep them from discussing my lack thereof. Hazel's face lights up.

"Oh Brent is just so sweet! I can't tell you guys how lucky I am!" She gushes. I pick up a black dress, weighing it in my hands while Hazel proclaims her love for Brent. It's sickeningly cute. Natasha stamps her foot, her eyes narrowing.

"I wish Pierce would just, I don't know. I'm never sure where I stand with him." She complains, crossing her arms against her chest. Jena twirls her hair around her finger, tilting her head to the side..

"He's totally in love with you Tash, he's just…" She trails off, blinking, unsure of how to describe Pierce. I laugh, and finish for her.

"He's just Pierce. There is no other _way_ to describe him." Natasha laughs, throwing back her red hair in agreement. After a pause, Jena leans in again conspiratorially.

"So, Shiloh. If you don't like Sam, is there anyone you _do _like?" I feel my heart race through my chest, and my mind instantly flashes directly to Eric. Dammit. No. No No No. Bad mind. There's no reason to be going there.

"I'm-I'm just trying to make it through initiation alive." I stammer, hoping that my face doesn't flush. Natasha looks unconvinced, putting one hand on her hip. She smiles.

"Oh don't play that game Shiloh. You _must _have your eyes on someone." I shake my head feebly. Hazel's face brightens all of a sudden.

"You like Felix, don't you!?" Her voice is triumphant. Jena looks back from me to Hazel incredulously. This is the last thing I expected. Felix is the last person I'd think of. I gape at her.

"No. I've never even thought of him like that." Something in my voice must be convincing, because Jena's frowns.

"Well, then who is it? Come on, you can tell us." I'm stalling, trying to think of anything to say. I'm about to just tell them that I was secretly in love with Justin and now my heart is broken forever, when a strong pair of arms wrap around my shoulders.

"Now now girls. Shiloh just doesn't want to admit that she has her eye on me, because she's afraid of all the competition." I flinch, because I would recognize that sarcastic, nonchalant voice anywhere. It's Peter. Peter, as in the Peter who kicked Tom's ass Peter. The Peter who Tris told to leave me alone. Natasha's eyes widen as Peter winds his arms around my waist. I roll my eyes.

"Yeah, you guys caught me. It's been Peter this whole time." Jena snorts at the cynicism in my voice. They know that there is clearly _nothing _between Peter and I. At least he's distracted them from their questioning.

"Why don't you girls move along for a moment while I have a word here with my lady." Peter remarks, clearly dismissing them. Hazel gives me a look of disbelief, and I just shrug.

"It's alright, I'll meet you guys at dinner." I reassure them. I watch the girls leave, and then break free of Peter's arms in a violent fashion. I turn around to face him, raising my eyebrows. He smirks, his dark green eyes full of mischief.

"I thought Tris told you not to flirt with me. Or something along those lines." I remark, pulling my hair over to my other shoulder. Peter's eyes go to my neck, and I know he's taking in the bruising. He must have some idea of what happened, because he doesn't ask, but oddly, his eyes look a bit remorseful.

"I'm not much of what you would call a 'rule follower' especially when it comes to pretty girls." He makes air quotes around the world rule-follower with his hands, and I can't help but chuckle.

"Besides, I was sent here to summon you by Tris." He continues, a businesslike tone creeping into his voice. I look at him skeptically.

"Tris sent _you_ to get me? That doesn't seem likely." Peter grins, flashing his white teeth. He throws his arm over my shoulder again, as if he's confiding in me. Really, he's just pulling me closer to him.

"Let's just say that I owe her a few big favors. And also I was the only person she could find." He informs me. I snort. That explains it.

"Plus, when I heard it was you, well, I just couldn't resist." Peter continues, pulling my hair back with his free hand. His face is inches from mine, and from the smirk that's on his lips, I know what he's about to try. Before he can, I pat his chest lightly.

"Thanks buddy." He winces slightly, like I've wounded him, and I shrug out from underneath his shoulder, heading out of the store in pursuit of Tris. A loud voice calls out after me.

"You'll come over to my side, I know it!" I don't turn back to look over my shoulder, and just run through the Pit. I'm thinking Tris is probably in her apartment, which I know is near Eric's, so I'll try there first.

On my way to find Tris, I nearly run smack into Eric. Or rather, he nearly runs smack into me. He looks both irritated and conflicted at the same time as he quickly grabs my shoulders to avoid knocking me down. I'm hoping that I can slide by him without incident, but that thought quickly evaporates when I see the angry look that crosses over his face.

"I thought I told you to stay with your friends, and to not go wandering by yourself." He snaps grumpily. I wince, shrinking back a bit. Oops. Guess I'm not much of a rule follower either.

"Where are you going, anyway? You just passed my apartment." Eric drops his arms from my shoulders, but his voice is still gruff. _Someone _obviously pissed him off badly.

"I'm going to see Tris. Peter said she was looking for me." Eric's eyes narrow, and for a moment, I wonder if Tris is the one who pissed him off.

"Well, she's in her and Four's apartment." He starts muttering under his breath, but I'm thankful that the worst of his mood seems to have subsided. I start walking towards Tris and Four's apartment, and Eric joins me, still angry, but not saying a word. He drops me off at the door.

"Please, for fuck's sake, don't leave Tris's by yourself. I don't need to be your babysitter all day long." Eric massages his temple. I am tempted to roll my eyes at him, but I just nod, and knock on the apartment door. Four answers.

"Uh, Tris wanted to talk to me?" I say, though it comes out more like a question. Four nods, glancing over my shoulder at Eric.

"I was just about to go workout, so maybe I'll go with Eric. I think he wanted to ask me for some advice." Four informs me. I hear the cracking of knuckles behind me, and to my surprise, Four grins widely. I would not be smiling at the look I imagine is on Eric's face. I step past Four, and he shuts the door behind him, leaving with Eric. Tris is across the room, lounging on a black leather couch. She smiles at me.

"Peter didn't give you too much trouble, did he? I did tell him to watch himself…" She trails off and sits up, patting the couch for me to sit next to her. I sigh exaggeratedly, and Tris laughs, before continuing.

"Anyways, I wanted to see how your simulation went yesterday. Did you have any trouble?" My body relaxes. I wasn't exactly sure why Tris had wanted to talk to me. I'm glad it was her checking in.

"Yeah, it went pretty well. There were just these huge spiders and I was trapped in a room with them. I figured I had to touch one to get out of the simulation, so I did, and then I woke up." Tris nods.

"That was the right path to take. You've always just got to think about what a Dauntless would do. What about Tom? He hasn't given you any trouble again, has he?" I shake my head at her, biting my lip.

"No. I think he's wary of Eric. But I still worry. I can't imagine him forgetting about what happened." Tris contemplates this for a few minutes. I glance around their apartment. It's pretty simple, and I wonder if that's from lingering Abnegation habits.

"Just be careful. Stick with your friends, and stick with Eric." I look back at her. Her face is oddly neutral, like she's putting up a mask.

"Stick with Eric?" I question. It's not like she and Eric have the best relationship, so I'm surprised by this. I watch Tris to see if her face reveals her true feelings, but she's good. There's no slip as she answers.

"Yes."

…

Tris and I walk to dinner, discussing what we would get if we got another tattoo. We had spent the rest of the afternoon in the apartment, just talking about our lives growing up. It was nice to talk about Cole. Tris talked about her brother, Caleb, and her deceased parents. I guess she sees Caleb on every family day, and sometimes in between, if she has need to go to Erudite.

When we arrive to the dining hall, everyone is already there. Four and Eric sit with the other trainers, and whatever tension there had been earlier seems to have gone. I wave goodbye to Tris and find my way over to my friends, making it a point not to sit next to either Sam or Felix. Sam glances up at me, giving me a small smile, before returning to his food. I plop down next to Pierce instead.

"What did Peter end up wanting?" Natasha is leaning around the other side of Pierce, her green eyes glinting curiously. I grin. I had forgotten about that whole scene in the store.

"Oh, he was just being annoying. Tris wanted to talk to me about…" I pause, stuffing a piece of bread into my mouth to cover my hesitation. I was about to reveal the actual reason Tris wanted to talk to me. I swallow a large mouthful.

"Tris wanted to talk to me about our sleeping arrangements. To make sure I was comfortable." Natasha looks relieved.

"Good. Good. I just don't trust Peter. We've always heard some nasty rumors about him." I shrug, taking a large gulp of water. There's a loud clanging from the front of the room, and we all turn around. Eric, Four, Tris, Marlene, and Uriah are standing, and surprisingly, they have the ranking board with them. My throat immediately closes. Are they making a cut early?

"Initiates. We wanted to give you an updated list of your rankings. Remember, the second stage is weighed much more heavily than the first." Four displays the board as he speaks.

1. Shiloh

2. Pierce

3. Brent

4. Felix

5. Natasha

6. Sam

7. Cam

8. Tom

9. Porter

10. Jena

11. Hazel

12. Lily

13. Trent

15. Tally

16. Paige

I stare at the board in absolute shock. I knew I was doing better than everyone else in my simulations. But I didn't realize _how_ much better. Hazel looks worried. She's right outside the line. Brent touches her arm reassuringly as Pierce nudges my shoulder playfully.

"Look at you, you stole my spot." His voice is pure humor, and I know he isn't really mad. I want to scream for joy when I see how far Tom has fallen. Thanks to Four, that is. I look over to his table, and startle when I realize that he's looking over here. For the first time since that night, he's watching me. He doesn't look away when I meet his eyes. Instead, his lips are carved into a dangerous smile, and at that moment I know I was right to still be suspicious of him. Once the dining hall has settled back down, Uriah makes his way over to our table.

"You guys up for a little Dauntless tradition tonight? To celebrate?" His hair is a mess of curls, and his smile is wide and bright. I can see why a lot of girls like him. Cam looks at Uriah cautiously.

"We're not going to be jumping off skyscrapers or something, are we?" He asks, like he already knows the answer. Uriah grins wider, leaning in to us.

"Even better."

….

A few hours later, the nine of us are jumping onto the train, along with all of the trainers except Four, and some other Dauntless members. Will and Christina have joined Tris, and are chatting away easily with the sway of the train car. Lynn, Marlene, Uriah, and Uriah's older brother, Zeke, stand with a few other Dauntless, causing mischief. Eric stands in the corner, talking with Peter. I'm assuming he only came to keep an eye on things. The night is clear, not a cloud in sight, and all of the buildings we pass are dark. You can easily see which buildings the city has started to restore, and which ones are still in disrepair. I stand against the wall, studying Tom and Paige across the way. They seem to have made friends with Tally and Trent, the two dark-haired Dauntless-born that appear to be twins.

"Where do you think we're going?" Felix asks, leaning against the wall next to me. I feel bad, because I've been kind of avoiding him, not wanting to give the girls the wrong idea. Felix has never given me any reason to think that he wants to be anything more than friends.

"Maybe back to the fence, and they're going to make us climb up the sides with our bare hands." I joke, though only half-heartedly. There's always a possibility. After only a few minutes, Uriah and his group scream and jump out of the train. I know Eric won't help me in front of all these people, so I'm careful as I take my jump. Everyone follows, and we find ourselves in the middle of the city, surrounded by skyscrapers. The rebuilders haven't gotten this far yet into the city, so everything is still rusted and old. We follow Uriah at a run into one of the tallest buildings. To my surprise, the Dauntless start cramming into the elevators. I thought we'd use the stairs.

"One hundredth floor!" Uriah calls. I follow Felix into an elevator, which is soon overflowing with Dauntless. I can see Eric still in the lobby, watching the scene with amusement. He's clearly waiting to have an elevator to himself. Must be nice. Someone presses the button, and I find myself pressed against none other than Peter. He raises his eyebrows, a simpering smile on his face. I want to hit him, but instead I just tilt my head to the side. Dauntless has really done a lot for my temper, now that I can channel it in to certain activities. I tell myself better Peter than Tom.

We reach the top, and I shove myself out of the elevator, far away from Peter. We're on the roof of the building, overlooking the whole city. Uriah stands near a contraption that's hooked up to a line of steel. The line juts off of the building and continues down over the city. I suddenly realize what we're doing, and smile. It is almost like jumping off of a skyscraper.

There aren't as many Dauntless as there were on the train, and I surmise that some of them went to the end of the line, to be able to let us out. Eric has finally made it up to the top, in his own elevator, and he leans against the building, watching Uriah take charge.

"Tris gets to go first, since she's the best at it." Tris grins, jumping up to be put in the harness. Uriah, Zeke, and Peter help her up, and buckle the straps tightly. They put the brake in her hand, before sending her over the city. She screams, but not in fear. It is pure joy. I watch in awe as she sails over the city, until we can't see her anymore. A few minutes later, the harness is pulled back up for the next Dauntless. Uriah glances around the faces, before his eyes fall on me.

"Next, our first jumper this year!" I laugh, bounding forward as my friends cheer. This is something I'm not worried about. The boys help me into the harness, buckling me in. Peter's hand rests on my thigh for a moment, and if I wasn't already strapped in I would've kicked him.

"Pull the break when you see the group at the bottom." Zeke tells me, handing me the metal bar. I'm about to ask him how far down it is, but then there's no time, because they're sending me off, and I'm flying.

I let out a shout of euphoria. It really does feel like I'm flying over the city. Everything I've been worried about; being Divergent, Tom, lying to my friends, Eric. It all disappears for these moments. The city is passing around me, and I almost wish I could slow down, to take it all in. Too soon, I see the group cheering at the bottom, and I pull at the metal break. I come to a stop, gently colliding with a padded wall they've set up. Tris helps me get unbuckled.

"Well?" She asks, her eyes still bright with adrenaline from her own trip. I take a breath in before answering.

"Amazing!" I exclaim, and she laughs. I help them propel the harness back up, and in a few minutes, we hear the sound of erratic screaming. I hold my stomach, laughing, because it's Pierce. One by one, my friends make their way to me, and one by one, I see their faces transform. For now, we have nothing to worry about.

"Can we go again?" Pierce is jumping up and down, begging Uriah for another turn. Everyone else has already made their way down, and is starting to head to the train. Uriah seriously considers it for a moment, but then shakes his head disappointedly.

"No, we have to go back. You guys do have simulations tomorrow." Pierce pouts, but doesn't argue, simply taking Natasha's hand and springing towards the train. I giggle, still high on adrenaline, and take Jena and Hazel's arms, leaving the boys in the dust.

We get back to Dauntless very late, late enough that the older Dauntless have already gone to sleep. I give hugs to my friends, even Sam, before heading down the halls with Tris and Eric. Tris leaves us at the door of Eric's apartment. Eric opens the door, stepping in and heading straight for the kitchen, likely for a late snack.

I turn to close the door behind me. At this point, I've completely forgotten about Tom. Until I see him standing like a shadow in the hallway. My heart stops. Tom must have been following us, to spy on me. And boy did he get an eyeful of information. He's seen me now, going into Eric's apartment. Tom grins, with a look that plainly says 'Gotcha' written all over his face. I shut the door quickly, breathing heavily. Eric is inhaling food, and has not noticed my strange behavior. I decide not to tell him what I've just seen, merely because I'm hoping against hope that Tom won't tell anyone. What good would it do?

"I'm going to shower." I call out unnecessarily to Eric, shakily heading into the bathroom. He grunts, now slinging back a large glass of water. I take a few extra minutes in the shower, hoping that I'm not going to regret my silence tomorrow. When I emerge, dressed for bed, Eric is already passed out. He's left me a good bit of room, and I climb in bed, careful not to disturb him. At least for right now, I'm safe.

**Review please? :) What do you guys think of Peter? Do you want more of him? Let me know!**


	14. Chapter 14EDITED

___**So I ended up tacking chapter fifteen back onto this one, because I thought chapter fifteen looked too short by itself! I might go back and edit it as well.**_

_Thanks to Digan Anderson, NMBC-Sally, lolalovespie, FaeSong, carmenrae608 Fiiaa, Midnight Moonlight302, CHIBI-CRAZY, DeadQuinn toutie743k and karalynn79! So sorry for such a long delay in posting! We went on a big family vacation and there were no electronics allowed, so we could focus on being relaxed and spending some family time. It was kind of a nice break, but I'm back in the real world now! I should be able to post quite a few chapters this week. Thanks again for all the support!_

_***Please note, there is some graphic language towards the end of this chapter that might upset some readers. I'll put three stars (***) before it so you can skip if you'd like._

XIV

I wake up early, though its hard to say that I really woke up whenever I was up most of the night anyway, worrying about what Tom might do. Who he might tell, and what he might say, or at the very least, insinuate. It's not that I think Eric or I would get in trouble; on the contrary, I know we wouldn't. He's the Dauntless leader, so he can do whatever he wants. If I was to get in trouble, Eric is the one who would be taking care of it. So I'm not worried about that. It's more that people will think I didn't earn my place in Dauntless. They will automatically assume that I slept my way to the top. There's a small group of Dauntless who feel this way about Tris, though they would never voice it too loudly. But dating your trainer during initiation is much, much different than sleeping with the head of Dauntless during initiation. I doubt anyone would believe the true story.

There are other worries that are congesting my mind as well. Worries that Tom might do something other than tell, though I can't imagine what that might entail. Mostly, I'm concerned that my friends will know that I've been lying to them. It's only for my own safety, but still. I do want to tell them the truth, but then I can imagine the hurt looks on their faces. Imagine that they'll abandon me, just when I need them the most.

I'm so preoccupied with thoughts of Tom and my friends that it takes me a moment to realize that in my sleep I've curled into Eric. My side touches against his, and my head is rested in the crook of his shoulder. My left arm lays across his hard stomach. More surprisingly, _his_ arm is around my shoulder, laying against my arm, pulling me into him. Must have been a reflexive thing. My face gets hot. Burning hot. Part of me doesn't really want to move, but I know I need to move before Eric wakes up. Otherwise I'm bound to either get teased or chewed out.

Slowly, I inch myself out from underneath his arm, which is a bit of a workout because it's pretty heavy. I lift my own arm from his stomach, and gently roll away from him. When I'm finally free, I quickly but carefully climb out of the bed. Eric doesn't wake. I study him for a minute. He's still intimidating in his sleep, but the lines on his face are softened. It's amazing how there isn't an ounce of softness on his body. I find myself wanting to trace over the patterns tattooed on his neck, and that's when I know I'd better clear out. Especially when I realize that my hand has stretched out like I'm going to reach out to him.

The bathroom tiles are cool on my feet, and that helps jolt me out of my daydreaming. I splash some cold water on my face to quicken the process. My neck has faded into a yellowish marbled color, and the scratches on my arms and legs are nearly invisible. I dig through the bag of clothes that Tris has lent me, finding a pair of black pants with zippers on the side, and a tight black camisole. She's also given me some makeup and some hair tools. I have extra time, so I figure I might as well look pretty, given that in a few hours there's the possibility that all of Dauntless will think I'm sleeping with Eric. I might as well look the part. Worthy of a Dauntless leader.

I take the time to straighten my hair, something I've only done a few times before, and something which leaves it hanging past my chest. My eyes are lined with a dark grey liner, to compliment my silver. I wonder if Tris specifically picked out certain colors for me. A few flicks of mascara, and a light nude gloss on my lips, and I'm done. I study my reflection in the mirror for a moment, before heading back out into the room.

Eric is climbing out of bed when I leave the bathroom. He raises his eyebrows at my appearance, his icy eyes flickering to my face, but he makes no comments, so I can't tell if he approves or disapproves. I sit down on the bed to lace up my boots as he goes to change in the bathroom. He's much quicker changing than I was, and leans against the doorframe, waiting as I finish with my boots. I know he would go ahead and go to breakfast if he didn't think I'd get into trouble on the way there.

I get my boots laced up, and cross the room towards him. My throat closes as my eyes meet his involuntarily. I feel like I'm betraying him. _Tell him about Tom_. My inner voice is screaming at me. But I can't force the words out of my mouth. I can't admit to him that I'm afraid. He opens the door for me, and we start down the hallway. If Eric notices my inner turmoil, he doesn't acknowledge anything. We simply walk in silence to the dining hall. It's becoming a beautiful routine.

**Eric's POV**

Shiloh is acting weird. I can tell that something is bothering her, weighing heavily on her mind. Her eyes have dark circles underneath them, and there's a tightness in her jaw that I haven't seen there before. I don't ask her if something is wrong, because I don't want to pry. Besides, if I had to guess, her agitation probably has something to do with that fucker Tom. I should have killed him when I had the chance.

We arrive at the dining hall, and I let her go ahead of me. I always wait a few minutes, just in case. She is supposed to be staying with Tris after all. We don't need any rumors starting just yet. After a while, I follow after her into the hall. She's already sitting with her friends, the usual glass of orange juice set in front of her. She sits next to Felix, which agitates me.

I pile up my plate with bacon, toast, and an orange as Four and Tris sit down with me. They've been pretty insufferable lately. Fucking stiffs.

"How are we dividing up the initiates today? All I know is that I get the lovely task of injecting Tom with a double dose." Four asks, a slight edge to his voice. Four is the only one of us three who can be in the room with Tom, since I would break his neck, and Four doesn't trust him with Tris. I can't say I blame him.

"I'm going to guess that Eric wants Shiloh." Tris coos over the table. Four's lips twitch in amusement. I pretend not to hear. Reacting only makes it worse. At least, that's what I keep telling myself. I focus my energy on making up groups for today.

"Let's have Four take Tom and Paige, since Paige takes the longest and he'll only have time for two. Tris can take Cam, Hazel, and Jena. I'll take Brent, Felix, and Shiloh." Maybe it's out of line, but I want to know what Felix is afraid of. A frown crosses Tris's face.

"Don't you think I should take Shiloh? I am kind of her mentor after all." Her voice is neutral. Too neutral. I study her face careful, but she's pulled it into a blank mask. Clearly she's keeping something from me. I don't have time to worry about a stiff's secrets. The look I give Tris shuts her up for the moment.

As I'm finishing up the last of my orange, I notice Tom across the room. Keeping tabs on what he's doing at all times has become natural to me, and it doesn't take long for me to realize what caught my attention. Tom is staring at Shiloh. But it's a different look on his face than the old looks he used to give her. He looks almost…angry and triumphant at the same time. His lip is curled up in something between a grimace and smile. I have to grip the edge of the table to stop myself from getting up and tearing the bastard limb from limb.

Four and Tris finish up their breakfasts, and get up from the table. I have to will each of my legs into action. Shiloh will be okay with her friends. Soon, I'll either be able to cut Tom from Dauntless or send him to permanent fence duty. Not soon enough. Both options are better than he deserves. I unwillingly follow Four and Tris to the simulation rooms, with the thought that the initiates will soon be with us keeping me going.

Thankfully, they're a rather eager bunch, and they meet us at the rooms within a few minutes. Shiloh still looks worried; she's biting on one of her nails, which is something I've never seen her do. There's a pale sheen across her face, and she's hardly interacting with her friends. I don't have time to worry about it, because Four makes a gesture to indicate he is ready to begin. We call our first victims in the room.

Brent does fairly well, taking about fifteen minutes to figure out how to escape. His fear was being trapped in a small space, which is pretty common. He doesn't even seem too shaken up afterwards. I usher him out, and call Felix into my room, grinning slightly at the sound of screaming coming from the next room over. Felix looks a bit disconcerted by my expression.

He sits quietly in the chair as I inject him with the serum. I eye the screen as his simulation starts. Felix is hanging off the edge of a skyscraper, about a hundred stories up. Fear of heights, another common one. It takes him just a little less time than Brent to climb up over the building, thus ending his simulation. Four is calling Paige into his room as I call for Shiloh, Tom leaving his room. He doesn't look nearly as bad as his screaming sounded. His face is a calm screen. The asshole must be getting desensitized to it.

Shiloh lays down in the chair, and I notice again how pretty she looks today. Not that other days she looks anything less, but she did something to her hair and made her eyes look even lighter. The whole appearance is marred by the worry that's etched into her face, and the slight paleness that has come over her skin. I still don't ask her what's on her mind, knowing that she won't tell me. We are alike in that way. I simply busy myself with the fear serum. I inject it on the side of her neck that isn't bruised, and it's impossible not to let my hand linger on her skin for a moment, though I know I shouldn't. I seem to be doing a lot of things I know I shouldn't be these days. Shiloh's eyes are already closed when I get to the screen.

She enters the simulation, and it looks like she's in Dauntless. The Dauntless hallways. It's dark, night time, and she's by herself, walking in slight confusion, trying to place her surroundings. That's when I realize what's about to happen. Fuck. I want to wake her, but I can't. All I can do is watch. Tom jumps out of the shadows, pinning her against the wall. Her face is pure terror. She screams for help, clawing at the simulation Tom.

"ERIC!" I've never heard Shiloh say my name before. It's painful to hear her say it so desperately. My hands are shaking wildly. There's nothing I can do to help her this time. Realization crosses her face as she remembers that she's in a simulation. She must have understood what she needs to do to escape her fear, because her simulation self leans in and kisses Tom. I feel like I might be sick.

Shiloh wakes up trembling, her eyes wide. I go to her, removing the electrodes from her head. She still made it in and out of the simulation very fast, about seven minutes this time. I help her sit up, and I can feel her whole body shaking. The Dauntless leader in me cracks for a moment, like it sometimes does when I'm around her.

"It's okay, you're safe. It was just a simulation." I tell her quietly, pulling her up to stand. She nods, her eyes beginning to focus again. I walk her to the door as she regains her composure.

"I think you should go back to the apartment and rest. " I demand. She definitely can't go anywhere and see Tom. Clearly, the whole situation still bothers her. Again I wish I had killed the fucker when I had the chance. Shiloh finally looks at me, her eyes focusing in on my face. Like she's trying to grasp reality.

"Okay."

**Shiloh's POV**

Eric opens the door for me, and I hope I look normal. My limbs feel like jello. Felix and Jena are waiting for me, leaning against the stone wall. From the looks they give me, I know I've failed at looking normal. Everyone else must have already gone to lunch, as the halls are quiet around us. Eric steps out from behind me, his hand wrapping around my arm.

"I'm going to bring greenie here back to Tris's. She's not feeling very well." He says this with such an insulting voice, like I'm so weak he can barely be bothered with me, that I'm almost convinced for a moment. Jena's eyes widen, and Felix automatically takes a step back.

"Shiloh, are you sure?" Felix bravely questions, his eyes flickering to the grip Eric has taken on my arm. I wonder if he thinks that Eric is a threat to me. I would have thought so not too long ago. Again I think about how funny it is how quickly things can change. I feel Eric tensing beside me, so before he can pounce on Felix for daring to question him, I hold up my hand.

"Yeah, I need to sleep for a little. Just a bad simulation. You know, about…Tom." I don't like playing the Tom card, even though it's true. Felix and Jena look conflicted. On the one hand, they understand that I probably _do _need some rest. However, they don't look happy about Eric leading me, but they have no choice. Eric has made that clear.

They leave, throwing suspicious glances over their shoulders. It's clear that they don't think Eric has good intentions. If only they knew. Eric is muttering under his breath, probably about Felix, but I mostly tune it out. I'm just trying to forget the simulation. Which, of course, makes me remember it more. I remember Tom lurking in the shadows. His body against mine. Calling for Eric. _Calling for Eric. _My face suddenly feels flushed. I wonder if Eric noticed it during the simulation. Surely he did. Maybe he just accounted it to the fact that he was there that night, so it was only natural for my instinct to be to call for him.

When we get back to the apartment, I immediately crash onto the bed. The simulation has taken away much of my energy. I curl into a ball, clutching a pillow, and watching Eric from across the room. He's making himself lunch. That's how I know he doesn't plan on leaving me alone. I close my eyes, feeling safe to sleep.

…..

I wake up groggily. I can tell that I've been asleep for quite a while because my limbs all have that heavy, dead feeling. A dreamless sleep, thankfully. The clock near the bed tells me that it's nearly dinner time. Eric is leaning back in his chair, his eyes closed, but not asleep. I study him for a moment. I can't make sense of his actions. Sometimes, he can be so mean to me. But then, he does things like taking me into his apartment. Even more, he seems to know that I don't feel safe alone, and so he spent the whole afternoon inside while I slept. I'm sure he'd rather be training or punching something. But he's not. He's here with me.

Does that mean that he…likes me? I think it's pretty clear at this point that he doesn't hate me as I first suspected. And I don't think that he would be doing all of this for anyone else. But I can't fathom the thought that he could have some kind of _feelings_ for me. He is Eric, after all. I don't have enough, or rather, any, experience with this sort of thing, so it's impossible for me to know. All I know is what I'm feeling, and it's unlike anything I've felt before. Like there's an ache in my bones that's crushing through my chest.

I shift on the bed, and the noise is enough to stir Eric. He glances over at me, and the sight of his eyes is enough for me to feel it again. Fire rushing through my veins, and a pressure deep inside of me. It's frighteningly real. I wonder if this is how Tris feels every time she looks at Four, or Four looks at her. It's both painful and wonderful at the same time. And discouraging, because I doubt I'll get what I want.

I make a quick trip to the bathroom to fix my hair. Thankfully, my makeup hasn't smudged in my sleep. A few quick strokes of the brush, and my hair is as good as new. When I emerge from the bathroom, Eric is waiting for me, his arms crossed over his chest.

"I can still take care of him." His voice is rigid, eyes dark. We don't have to acknowledge the name of who he speaks about. It's obvious. I suck in a breath, and I swear I can feel the spots on my neck more prominently.

"I'll…I'll think about it." I stutter. Eric's lips tighten unhappily. We both know what I mean by 'I'll think about it'. That I don't want him to do anything, but I'm afraid of just outright saying no. He makes a face, like he's going to speak, but then decides against it. He glances at the clock.

"We'd better get going to dinner. I told Tris to meet us in the hallway in a few minutes, so that you two can walk in together." I nod, suspecting he is trying to placate Felix. Tom hasn't told anyone anything yet, so the act is still up. We open the door, and find Tris and Four already standing outside. There's a strange tension between Four and Eric these days, and they just give each other a slight nod of acknowledgement. Tris takes my arm gently, her eyes wide.

"Hey Shiloh. I heard your simulation went rough?" The edge in Tris's voice is unmistakable. She thinks Eric has discovered my divergence. I shake my head slightly at her.

"No, just tired me out, that's all. I had to relive my little encounter with Tom…" I trail off, hoping she gets the point. Her shoulders relax, and she gives me a small smile. We start walking, and I start thinking about what Eric's reaction _would_ be if he found out I am Divergent. Sure, he wasn't on Jeanine or Max's side during the war, but that didn't mean he would be accepting. He might hate me for it. Which makes the likelihood of me getting what I want even less likely.

We reach the dining hall, and Eric waits behind, allowing Four, Tris, and I to enter first. My friends immediately notice the group I walk in with, and look relieved. I wave goodbye to Four and Tris, settling into a seat next to Jena. Having skipped lunch, I'm starving.

"Are you feeling better?" Cam inquires, stacking a burger onto my plate. I take another one, much to Pierce's amusement, and fill up a glass of water. I notice Eric enter the room, falling into his usual seat.

"Much better. That was the worst simulation yet for me." I reply, taking a large bite. This gets them going on their own fear simulations, and it's a welcome distraction from my own. Even with all of this, part of my focus remains on Eric. Trent, one of the Dauntless-born who has recently befriended Tom and Paige, is speaking to him and Four, waving his hands theatrically. He looks worried. I check Tom's table, and realize that Tom, Paige, and Tally are all missing. Eric and Four have scowls on their faces, but to my surprise, they leave their seats and stride out of the dining hall, Trent scurrying after them.

Throughout the rest of dinner, my mind is half-focused on what might be going on. I know my friends can tell I'm distracted, but they probably chalk it up to the fear simulations. When they're finished, and about to head to the dorm, Eric has still not returned. Tris has also already left, presumably to find Four.

"Do you want us to walk you to Tris's?" Hazel asks, leaning against Brent's shoulder. Felix is yawning sleepily. I shake my head, hoping my face doesn't look suspicious. It's not like they'd be leading me to _Tris's _apartment.

"I'll be fine. I'll see you guys tomorrow, okay?" I give out a round of hugs before watching them leave. I wonder what has kept Eric so long. I know he'll be angry at me for walking back to the apartment by myself, but I have no choice at this point. I can't stay in the dining hall all night.

I set off quickly, hoping to get back before it's too late. The Pit is still brimming with life, but the back hallways that lead to the apartment are always quiet. I've almost made it when I get that feeling. The feeling that tells me something isn't quite right. I stop dead in the hallway, my eyes searching the darkness.

"Hello?" I call out cautiously. There is silence, and I feel stupid. I'm obviously just being paranoid after today. I stride forward, and find myself entangled in a pair of arms. I'm forced down another hallway, a warm hand covering my mouth. The scent alone tells me that it's Tom.

When we stop, I manage to get a good look at my surroundings. We're standing on one of the bridges that cross over the chasm. Far enough away from the Pit that no one is around, and no one will be able to hear. Tom shoves me hard against one of the railings, immobilizing me with his own body. He is not drunk this time. His motivations are different. He wants me dead. And he is all too dangerous. Because this time, he has a knife pressed against my neck.***

"So predictable. Coming back by yourself." He hisses. He's right. And of course I'm wishing I had taken Hazel up on her offer. But now it's too late.

"Did you really think that I was going to let you get away from me?" Tom's voice is taunting. Because he knows he's got me now. There is no one nearby. Eric is nowhere to be found. Even Four and Tris… Suddenly it all makes sense. Trent, Tally, and Paige obviously have had a part in this. They've distracted them somewhere, or caused something to happen. All for Tom.

"They'll know who did it." I choke out. I'm trying not to feel Tom's hand roaming my body. Trying not to feel the knife pressed against my neck. Not cutting into my skin…yet. He grins, his eyes narrowing vindictively.

"They won't be able to prove it. I've read the Dauntless code. We're not in Candor. No proof, no punishment. They'll just find your body in the chasm. Maybe you jumped. Or fell. Who knows." I take this moment to try and free one of my hands. He laughs, twisting my arm back forcefully.

"Eric will know. And he won't follow the rules." I promise him darkly, spitting each word out. At Eric's name, Tom's face hardens. He leans in closer to me, his lips against my ear.

"Oh, I know _all_ about Eric. I saw you with him. What, are you fucking him? Fucking your way to the top, huh? I never took you for a whore. But you must be, to be doing the Dauntless leader. I bet you like it rough." He makes a deep cut down my shoulder blade, his other hand reaching my breasts. I feel the blood running down the back of my shirt.

"You'll fuck Eric, but you won't fuck me? I don't think so." Tom's voice is deeper now, and I know what he's going to do. He presses his lips against mine, his hand clawing to rip off my pants. The knife is tucked away, because he wants both hands now to accomplish his goal. I don't hesitate this time. I bite down on his bottom lip, hard enough to draw blood. He steps back, cursing.

"You little bitch." He screams, his eyes crazed. I realize I might have just sped up my own death. His desire had slowed him down, but now it was pure anger. That was okay, because I'd rather die. Tom shoves me over the railing, and I feel myself falling. I manage to grasp the last rail, hanging over the edge of the chasm. I know it's pointless. Tom steps forward with the knife in hand, and I close my eyes, picturing my friends, remembering my mother and Cole, and finally, thinking of Eric. I prepare myself to die.

**Eric's POV**

"Where else do you think they would be?" Four is questioning Trent, his voice starting to lose the usual calm mask. He's getting irritated. We all are. We've been walking around Dauntless, searching for Tom, Paige, and Tally, for nearly an hour now. Trent had come to Four and I at dinner, saying that he hadn't seen them since they had met up right after training this morning. He was worried that something had happened. Blah blah blah. The only reason we're bothering to look for them is because we hope we can get Tom in trouble for something. Why else would he out of sight for this long, other than to break the rules? Personally, I'm hoping I can use the bastard as target practice with the knives.

Tris is leaning against the wall, eyeing Trent warily. She showed up a few minutes ago, wondering what was taking us so long. Immediately upon hearing the story, her guard had gone up, and she's been studying Trent with sharp eyes. Frankly, I don't trust Trent either. His dark eyes shift around as Four questions him, and his answers are short. He's been giving us places to look, where his friends might be, but none of them have yielded anything. We had already searched the dorms, the various bars in the Pit, and even the training rooms. I pace back and forth, just about done with our little adventure. If Tris is here, that means that dinner is almost over. With Tom missing, I don't need Shiloh wandering the halls by herself. Hopefully she is still with her friends.

"Well, they might have gone into the tower. I heard them talking about how they wanted to try to break in…" Trent supplies, running his hands over his arms and shrugging. Four scowls in displeasure. He's talking about the security tower, where Four and Tris work when initiation isn't in session. That will take another hour to search through all the rooms. But, if they are there, it's something we can get Tom in trouble for. Breaking into the tower is serious business.

"Let's go." I bark, jogging off towards our destination. The sooner we can get this fucker, the better. Tris and Four follow behind me, dragging Trent along with them. We reach the base of the tower, which is locked. I gaze at it, and something in the back of my mind is alarming me. It's going to be such a pain to try and search everywhere here, and I'm not sure any of the missing three are even smart enough to break in. I whirl around to Trent.

"Are you sure this is where they would go?" I inquire, glaring intensely at him. It's a look I typical save when I really want to scare someone, and it works instantly. I see his face falter, and his eyes reveal the truth. Then everything makes sense. Why Trent has been so unhelpful in locating his friends. Because he already knows where they are. Why we've been searching the most painstaking places in Dauntless. Because those will take the most time. Why he came to us in the middle of dinner. Because that's the easiest time to create a distraction. And why we've been only searching the areas that are on the opposite end of Dauntless from my apartment. Because that's where everything is going wrong.

It doesn't take me long to put it together. I was Erudite at one point. But I should've figured it out sooner. Now, it might be too late. But where exactly are they? It comes to me as I remember my fear landscape, and I see her dangling over the chasm, and then I know.

"Shiloh." The words escape me before I can stop them. Trent's face is suddenly fearful, and I know I'm right. He dashes away as I growl; probably headed to where he knows Tally and Paige are hidden, to tell them that the plan has failed. For a second I want to chase him, and crush him, but I know that I don't have time. I made my choice on the first day of initiation. I grab the gun I keep hidden on my side, and start running, Four and Tris's footsteps behind me.

**Shiloh's POV**

I'd always thought that when you're about to die, your whole life flashes before your eyes. That was the saying anyways. But here I was, dangling and about to fall to my death, and all I could think about was Eric. I picture his eyes, and the tattoos crawling over his neck. I remember how he'd helped me after Tom had attacked me. I can feel the way his hand touches my neck when he is administering the fear simulation serum. Am I selfish? To be thinking of only Eric as I'm about to die. I should be thinking about my friends, Cole, my mother and deceased father. Even Tris, and Four. Hell, even Peter, who'd given me a good laugh. All I can think about is Eric. Maybe I am selfish. But I always knew I wasn't fit for Abnegation. I focus on remembering the sound of Eric's voice, the rough growl I'd been teased with, and that's when I hear it. I hear a loud roar, like thunder, but if the storm was inside Dauntless, echoing against the walls.

I open my eyes, and look for the source of the sound. It's only been a millisecond since Tom pushed me over the railing. That's how quickly everything speeds up when you're about to die. Tom doesn't hear the roaring. He's still crazed with anger, stomping towards me. Eyes rolling, face spread in a malicious grin. I look up and down both hallways. Then, I can see the source of the noise. Barreling down the right hallway. Pure rage and terror. And I don't care what he might think. I don't care about anything except one thing. I scream.

"ERIC!" The sound of my voice stops Tom in his tracks, and he turns. He sees what I see, and his face pales, and finally, for the first time, he has the decency to look afraid. He takes a quick step to me, intending to finish the job.

"Please! Eric, help!" I try again in desperation. Before Tom can get to me, the first bullet hits his arm. Realizing he's dead, Tom bolts, and the second bullet hits his shoulder. He staggers, but continues to run as another bullet whizzes past his head. In his rage, Eric's shooting isn't as on point as usual.

My grip is starting to slip as Eric stops in front of me. No hesitation this time, no wondering if he should go after Tom. He hands the gun to Four, who is running after Tom. In a swift motion, he grasps my arms and pulls me over the railing. For a moment, I just stand, breathing heavily. Processing everything that just happened. Tris, seeing that I'm now safe, turns to follow Four and Tom. I find Eric's eyes, wanting to see if I had pictured them right. Then I feel the searing pain of my shoulder, and nearly collapse. Eric scoops me up, and takes off running.

"Fuck." His voice is urgent and breathless. I feel myself coming in and out of consciousness as we fly down the hallways. Within a minute, we're inside Eric's apartment. He takes me into the bathroom, and I feel a sense of deja vu coming on. This time, when he sets me down, he keeps a hold of my waist with one arm. There's no pause as he pulls of my shirt, and curses. Even half-conscious, I can see how soaked the shirt is with blood. It's a black shirt, and I can still tell where the blood has soaked into the material. Eric is studying my wound, his eyes unreadable.

"It's too wide for stitches." His voice is flat, and that's what scares me even more. Eric starts pulling out bandages, towels, everything he could need from the cupboard, still keeping a firm hold on me. I'm glad, because I'm close to passing out. He starts wiping off the blood that has collected on my back. Towel after towel gets soaked, turning crimson. He rinses out the wound with water, and I let out a muffled cry. I bite my lip when he finally places a bandage over the wound, taping it up tightly. He pulls a large black shirt over me, that's obviously his, and discards of my pants, which are ripped. I have nothing left.

Eric picks me up, and carries me to the bed, gently laying me down. I watch him through lidded eyes as he watches me. He paces back and forth, alternating between watching me and watching the door. I know he wants to go and stay at the same time. We both jump as Four and Tris burst in, unannounced. From the looks on their faces, it isn't good news.

"The little bitch got away. He must have had a Plan B, because he disappeared down a set of hallways even I've never been in before. I told the guards to shoot him on site if he shows back up." Four is telling Eric the story as Tris comes over to examine me. She doesn't ask me if I'm okay, and I'm thankful. She leaves a few minutes later with Four.

Eric is sitting on the bed. He brushes the hair back from my face, and if I was more conscious, I would have blushed. I don't really have extra blood to spare at the moment however.

"Shiloh, I will find him. And I will make him pay." Eric promises me. He goes to stand, but I grasp at his arm. He turns to look at me questioningly.

"Just…can you stay?" I ask him meekly. And he does.

**Review? :)**


	15. Chapter 15

_Some more thanks as always to give! Thanks to FoureverDivergent04, Belle1988, Annie016, Chisana Hikari, and heminglane! Thank you to those who are faithful reviewers, and thank you to all of those who just read! I can't tell you how much I appreciate the support! _

_Also, I would love if you would check out my new Divergent story, Rise and Fall, which features Peter._

XV

**Eric's POV**

I don't know how much I've slept. It's been difficult to not leave the room, and search out Tom. I doubt he would be hard to find. It would take me a few days on the ground, maybe a week at most, to search him out. He's likely taken refuge with the Factionless. Candor would have asked questions if a former member came back in the middle of initiation, probably looking and acting crazed. Plus, he was shot twice, so he would need to be receiving some medical care. The Factionless only have a few resources for the sort of care needed to extract bullets and care for the wounds. It would be so easy for me to track him. To sneak into the night, find him, and kill him with my bare hands.

I also want to find Four, and see if the other three escaped. I know that he and Tris were going to search around for them, and I wanted to join him. It's likely that they made it out, and met with Tom somewhere. However, it's possible that they weren't able to make it out of Dauntless. If we had caught them, we could get information of where Tom might go out of them. Every time I almost willed myself into action, I looked at Shiloh lying wounded next to me. She asked me to stay with her. I wouldn't want her to wake up and be alone.

I'm a little bit angry with her. If she had just waited for me in the dining hall. Or just stayed with her friends and gone to the Pit, this could have been avoided. But Tom knew her weak spot, and exploited it. He used me to do it. That's probably the worst part. The fucker used me as a pawn in his game. I'm mostly angry at myself. Because I should have killed the bastard when I'd had the chance. If I ever see him again, I won't hesitate. I know that I won't rest until he's dead, no matter how long it takes for me to find him.

I glance over at Shiloh. Her blonde hair is laying across her face. She's laying on her back, which I can't imagine is comfortable. My black t-shirt has ridden up on her legs, exposing her thighs, which have been toned from all of the Dauntless training. Even seeing this, I can only think of last night. When I saw her hanging over the chasm, grasping for her life…I couldn't see straight. Otherwise Tom would've been dead in one shot. To hear her call my name in such desperation was soul-crushing. It had been the first time she had said my name in real life; the only other time had been in her simulation. It wasn't exactly the way I want her to say my name. She shifts a bit on the bed, her lips pursed like she's having a nightmare. Her breathing is uneven, and I know she's dreaming about last night. I want to reach out to her, to wake her from this fate, but I don't. She does need the sleep, even troubled as it is.

When I look at her, I almost feel a bit nauseous. Like there's a pit in my stomach. I'm not used to feeling any kind of weakness. Part of my Dauntless training was to put aside my feelings, and usually I can. But not for Shiloh. The thing that I've been fighting, I'm in too deep now. There's no going back from what has happened. It can only go two ways now. I can win the game, or everything can end in flames.

I knew that when I first say her on the first day of training that I wanted her. I can clearly remember the look on her face as she stood on the ledge, her red Amity dress brushing against her thighs. Her lovely face, set in determination. I remember thinking how sexy she was, how she was the most beautiful girl I had ever set my eyes on. But that was just lust. I'd wanted her in a very specific and physical way. I still do. Fuck, there's no words to describe how badly I still want her in that way. The things I would do… But now, there's another kind of want that's even stronger than lust. It's the kind of want that leaves you exhausted. The kind of want that leaves me incapable of thinking straight. Something inside of me has been shifting towards this ever since that first day, but I haven't been able to think it until now. I'm falling in love with Shiloh.

**Shiloh's POV**

I wake up in a surge of pain. Gasping for breath. Everything that has happened assaults my mind in an instant. Eric lays to my right, in the same place where he climbed in when I asked him to stay with me last night. Not close enough to touch me, but closer than usual. Close enough that I can see the individual specks of blue in his eyes. He's already awake, gazing thoughtfully at my face. Gauging my reaction to the rush of pain.

I roll over to my stomach because my shoulder blade is throbbing, a slight moan escaping my lips. I hear Eric getting up from the bed instantly. A few seconds later, there's a noise coming from the bathroom. He must be rummaging through the cabinets for something. I sit up, steadying myself as the world spins around me, and I hope I don't puke. Eric comes out of the bathroom carrying a glass of water and a couple of pills. Pain medicine.

"You couldn't have given that to me last night?" My voice is more cutting than usual, and I know he doesn't deserve it. He's saved my life twice now. Still, I can't help but be snippy this morning. I feel like I've earned the right to a little attitude.

Eric narrows his eyes a bit, but chooses not to respond. Probably a wise decision. There's something bubbling inside me, though I can't figure out the source. It's not pleasant. Eric hands me the pills and glass of water silently. I can tell that he's angry though. Not just about my tone of voice. He's obviously been brewing about something all night. I swallow the pills, studying his face.

"What? What are you pissed about?" I finally ask as he stands in front of me, not fully looking me in the eye. I'm staring at his bare chest, transfixed a bit. He doesn't answer me immediately, so I glance up. I can just tell by the way his face looks, that he's irritated. He clenches his jaw, and I know I'm in for it.

"You could have waited to walk back last night. If you had just listened to me, we could have prevented this." His voice is a low grumble, too harsh of a tone for the early hour. I feel my mouth drop open in shock. I can't believe he's blaming me. It's not like I asked Tom to attack me. I never wanted any of this. All I wanted was to be Dauntless.

"You think this is _my _fault?" My voice pitches upwards. I'm on the edge of hysterics. Eric's eyes harden, and he finally looks at me. His eyes are pure ice, and the look on his face…It's the first time I've been afraid of him in a long time. He growls at me.

"No, it's mine. I should have taken care of the fucker a long time ago." He turns, walking back to the bathroom with the empty glass. A million thoughts go racing through my head. I stare at his back for a moment, and then, I explode.

"Yeah? And then what? Are you going to stop every person who tries to hurt me? Because we all know that I'm the weakest link here! You've made that clear from the start. Everyone has made it clear!" I jump up from the bed, following after him.

"I don't even know why you bother! You clearly have some sort of issue with me, ever since I got here. You should have just let Tom kill me. IT WOULD HAVE SAVED EVERYONE A LOT OF TROUBLE!" I'm in front of him now, pushing at his chest, screaming nonsensically at him. Tears rush down my face, and I don't care. Eric doesn't move. It's not like I'm hurting him. We both know that this has nothing to do with him, and everything to do with me. How I feel defeated. How I feel weak. He wraps his arms around me, and I don't know if he's trying to offer me comfort or stop me. Either way, it's the first time he's really touched me, really touched me for a purpose other than aggravating me or helping me after something Tom has done, and that alone stops my rage and despair. I crash into him, letting my body rest against his, leaning my head on his chest. To my surprise, he pulls me in closer. I can feel his arms bulging around my waist.

Eventually, my breathing slows, and my tears stop. Still, Eric doesn't move, doesn't let go of me. I wonder what we must look like. Eric, the huge Dauntless leader, tattoos running up and down his arms and neck, wearing nothing but a pair of black shorts. Clutching a sobbing initiate, about half his size, who just so happens to be wearing his t-shirt that's exposing a whole lot of leg. We must look ridiculous. But it doesn't matter. If I had my choice, I would freeze this moment in time. So I could just live in it forever.

There's a loud, persistent knocking on the front door. Eric finally lets go of me, a sigh slipping through his lips, and he strides toward the knocking. I wonder what he's thinking, and I feel ashamed by my outburst. Maybe later I'll have a chance to apologize. I quickly fix myself, wiping the tears from my cheeks, straightening my hair, and pulling down Eric's shirt on my thighs. Eric opens the door.

Four and Tris both stand there, dark circles under their eyes. They push their way into the apartment, past Eric, and both start talking at the same time. "Eric I need to tell you-" "Shiloh we have a problem-" They stop, looking at each other with a slight agitation that I'm guessing comes from a lack of sleep. There's a slight pause, and then through silent communication, Tris allows Four to speak first.

"The other three, we spent all night searching for them. They must've gotten out through one of the back entrances after Trent got to them. I told the guards to be on the lookout, but, well, I'm guessing they're somewhere with the Factionless now. We could start a search for them, but that might take months, if we're lucky. And that would mean taking soldiers off the fence." Four tries to say this as neutrally as possible, not wanting to sound as if he's trying to tell Eric what to do. I'm not really surprised that Paige, Tally, and Trent got away. Nor do I really care that much. The only one who was really a threat was Tom. Eric doesn't look happy, but he nods in assent.

"I want you to cancel the training for today. We're all too tired. " He tells Four, rubbing at his temple. I notice that he has dark circles under his eyes as well. Four grimaces lightly.

"That's the other thing. With those four out of the picture, there are only eleven initiates left. We've never been this low on initiates before. Are we really going to cut just one person?" I look to Eric. Is it possible that we all could now be guaranteed a place in Dauntless? Eric's face is set in a frown. I surmise that this initiation has not gone to plan.

"No, but they still need to complete training and be ranked. It still counts for their job placement." Four nods. Tris is rocking back and forth on her heels, and when she senses an opening, she takes it.

"We have another problem. One that we're going to need to handle as soon as possible." I cringe. What else could possibly go wrong? Eric crosses his arms.

"So, word has pretty much gotten out about what happened. People know that Tom was trying to kill Shiloh. They know that Eric, Four, and I saved her, and now that Tom is MIA. That's all the information that is floating around." I frown. That's pretty much factual, and I'm not really sure what Tris is worried about. She continues on.

"Well, the word traveled fast. This morning, after we got back from our search, Felix came to our door. He was worried about Shiloh, wanted to check on her. I tried to stop him from coming in, but he made it past me. It was apparent to him that Shiloh was not with me, nor did it seem like she had ever been with me. He doesn't have any clue where you _have _been, but he knows you've been lying to them all." My stomach drops. So by now, Felix has probably told everyone. All of my friends know that I've been lying to them.

"I've got to tell them the truth! Before they start telling other people, and rumors get exaggerated. What if they don't believe me?!" I start rushing around the apartment, finding pants, a shirt. Four politely averts his eyes away.

"It's not a big deal Shiloh. Tell them the truth, and if they don't believe you, oh well." Eric's voice is confident. It's easy for him though. No one is going to look at him and say that he slept his way to the top.

"It is a big deal! I don't want people to think I slept my way into Dauntless, because I didn't. And I've been lying to my friends for so long! I may not be Candor, but I still don't want to have to lie to my friends." I'm dressed in a second, and with all the adrenaline running through me I don't even feel the deep cut on my shoulder blade. I start heading out the door.

"Where-Shiloh-didn't we just talk about how you shouldn't be going places by yourself?" Eric growls, his face angry again. I turn back for a second, and say, "Who's left to hurt me?" before I stride out of the door.

**Eric's POV**

I watch as Shiloh slams the door behind her, and groan in frustration. Four and Tris give me sympathetic looks, which makes the whole situation worse. I start pacing back and forth in the living room while their eyes follow my progress.

"So I take it you're really close to fucking things up? Could you not? I really like Shiloh, and you're way less of a prick around her." Tris's voice is a mixture of annoyance and pleading. I shoot her a dark look.

"I'm trying my best okay. It's not easy. I've never had to deal with this kind of thing before. Believe me, I don't want to fuck up. I'm falling in love with her. Or I am in love with her. I don't want to just come out full force and screw everything up. I have no idea what her feelings are towards me." The words come so fast out of my mouth that I can't believe I just said them. It's too late to take it back. Tris doesn't look surprised however, and just rolls her eyes at me.

"Yeah, I know you love her, but couldn't-" I stop mid-pace, my eyes narrowing at her as I interrupt.

"What do you mean _you_ know I love her? How could you? I just figured it out this morning." Four laughs gently behind me like he's already in on the joke. Tris eyes me speculatively.

"You just didn't _know_ that you knew that you loved her."

**Shiloh's POV**

I find my friends in the transfer dorms. It's about lunchtime now, so I'm surprised that they're here, rather than in the Pit or headed towards the dining hall. Brent and Hazel are leaning together. Cam and Jena are holding hands, sitting on one of the beds. Pierce and Natasha sit on the floor, while Sam stands off the to the side. Felix is standing in the middle of them all, his arms crossed. That's when I realize why they're here, and not out. They're discussing my betrayal.

When I walk into the room, all of their eyes shoot up. Most of them have the decency to have a guilty look on their face. Except Felix. One look and I know he's angry.

"We need to talk." I say.

…

When I'm done talking, they all just stare at me for a moment. I've told them everything. How Eric was the one to save me after the first time, and how I've been staying with him. Except I made it sound like I was only staying with him because Four and Tris didn't have room, because they needed privacy. I certainly didn't tell them that Eric and I slept in the same bed. Nor did I mention any of the confusing feelings I was having towards Eric. Instead, I made it sound as platonic as I could, suggesting that it was just for my safety, and that I hadn't told them because Eric didn't want rumors to go around.

I'm breathing in quick, short gasps when Jena comes and wraps her arms around me. I exhale a bit erratically.

"I wish you hadn't lied to us, but I understand why you did. You didn't want us to think you were getting special treatment, that you were using Eric to help yourself. You had to keep yourself safe." I nod, the tears now streaming out of my eyes. The rest of them come and give me hugs in turn, except for Felix, who stands back a bit.

"Honestly Shiloh, we probably wouldn't have thought you had something going on with Eric. I mean, we've seen the way he treats you." Pierce tells me, smiling as he lets me go. I let out a fake laugh.

"Now, let's go get some lunch, I'm starving!" He shouts joyfully. We laugh, and start to file out of the dorm. I grab Felix's arm as he passes.

"Felix?" My voice is uncertain. He stops, sighing, and running his hands through his hair. His green eye are troubled.

"It's just…I know there's something else. Maybe you don't know, but I do. I can tell by the way Eric looks at you Shiloh." He gives me a sort of sad grimace, before leaving. I stand, flabbergasted. The way Eric _looks_ at me?

**Review, favorite, follow? :3 Especially reviews. I love the reviews. And spoiler I think next chapter, we might get to see a little k-i-s-s-i-n-g :O! Don't worry though, this story is FAR from being over. After all, Tom isn't dead yet. :)**


	16. Chapter 16

_Some thanks to sorryno-account, __morbidly-funny__, __rhiannonburr__, __roxas' billa kaulitz__, __whiteearth__, __xlifeisbeautifulx__, __Mbradbury1207__, __Wonderland Reen__,__Innocent Sarcasm__, __Melusine78__, and __JohnnyStormsGirl__. And as always, thank you to all of my readers, anonymous reviewers, and everyone who has just looked at this story!_

_I'm going to be getting really busy since summer is starting, so I will not be able post as frequently. Hence the large delay this past time. I'm hoping I won't go that long again between. But I promise to post at least once every two weeks, hopefully more. Think of it this way: You get to enjoy the story for that much longer ;) I'm also working on an original novel, so that takes up most of my writing time. But I promise I'm not giving up on my two fanfics!_

XVI

When I walk into the dining hall for lunch, nearly every head in the room turns to find me. Tons of unblinking eyes, studying my every move. The word of Tom's attack must have spread very quickly. By now, all of Dauntless knows. I know they are looking to see how it affected me. They want to see if I show any weakness. I keep my head high, though I'm sure my face is flushed a little. I hear breathy whispers as I pass tables, and I can feel their eyes studying me for any damage. At least the only injury Tom left me with this time is on my shoulder blade, mostly covered by my tank top and hair.

None of the faces look at me accusingly as I pass, and that's how I know that no one other than my friends know about the depth of Eric's involvement; that he was letting me stay in his apartment. No one is going to think that I have slept my way into Dauntless, except maybe Felix. As far as the rest of Dauntless is concerned, Eric just saved me last night, nothing more.

I'm not sure that there is nothing else between Eric and I though. Especially after Felix's comments. I remember his words. _"It's just__…__I know there's something else. Maybe you don't know, but I do. I can tell by the way Eric looks at you Shiloh." _His words stick to my mind as I think about the way Eric looks at me. Every look, every conversation, and every touch, no matter how small, makes a little bit more sense. I'd gotten it all wrong. Because Eric _didn't _hate me. Maybe he never had. I'm not sure exactly what his feelings are towards me, but I am pretty sure it isn't hate. I'm not sure what Eric wants, but I am sure about what I want. I want Eric. No matter what anyone might think. Now, I've just got to get him.

Finally, we make it past all the curious eyes, and settle in to our usual table. I'm careful to not sit next to Felix, instead squeezing in between Natasha and Brent. Felix sits across from me, not looking my way. I bite my lip. I can't tell if his words earlier were said out of jealousy or if he was just still angry that I had lied to him. Maybe he thought I was still lying, and that there _was_ something going on between Eric and I. I can't imagine that he would be jealous. I'd never gotten the vibe from Felix that he wanted us to be something, anything more, than friends. Not that I'm the best at discerning other people's feelings. I'm still figuring out how to recognize my own.

I pour myself a large glass of water, mostly to avoid looking around the room. Water droplets drip down the side of the glass, and I watch their progress. I can't hear any whispering anymore, but that doesn't mean much. Natasha hands me an orange, and I take my time peeling it, setting the skin to the side. When I finally do chance a glance up, no one is looking my way. They've all gone back to their lunches. The one good thing about Dauntless is that there's so much excitement, one event is quickly followed by another. This whole situation will blow over pretty fast.

I relax once I realize that the whole of Dauntless is not riveted on me. Everything seems to be going back to normal. Pierce is inhaling pounds of food at various rates of speed, while Natasha looks on in disgust. Sam is joking around with Felix. Cam and Jena are bantering with each other, while Brent and Hazel just sit in a cloud of love. Eric, Four, and Tris are having some kind of disagreement at the trainer table, which is about as normal as it can get. I watch them for a moment, popping an orange wedge into my mouth. More like, I watch Eric for a moment. His jaw is clenched as he argues with Four, shooting Tris a dirty look ever so often. Icy eyes narrowed, lips pursed, and his muscles flexed. He should be scary to me. He is to everyone else. But all I want to do is get closer to him. Like there's an invisible string between us, and it's tugging on me to go to him.

I'm interrupted by a sudden pain in my calf. Someone has kicked me under the table. Felix's eyes are down on his plate, but he sits directly across from me, so he's the most likely perpetrator. His eyes flash up to mine, a warning clearly visible. The orange sours on my tongue. He's definitely not jealous. He just doesn't believe me when I say that nothing is happening between Eric and I. I sigh, and go back to my lunch.

I'm finished before everyone else, and I try to wait patiently for them to finish up. I feel so good, letting go of my lies, and I'm looking forward to the afternoon off. Even Felix can't ruin my good mood. Finally, Pierce swallows the last chunk of food on the table, and drains his glass of water.

"Well, what are we waiting for, you pansycakes? Let's get this show on the road!" Pierce yells, jumping up from the table. Sam grimaces, but otherwise ignores his friend. We all climb up from the table, and try to keep up with Pierce, who has taken off down the hallway.

Because the trainers have given us the day off, we have much more time than we're used to. Today is our twelfth day in Dauntless. Twelve days of a combination of pure exhaustion, fun, and fear. We've only explored a small portion of the Pit. There are still shops we haven't looked in. The boys would rather die than go clothes shopping, so they leave us to go mess around in the training room. Hazel, Jena, Natasha and I find a jewelry store we haven't been in yet, hidden in a small nook. It's got a mixture of costume jewelry, as well as cases of beautiful refined gemstones. We start browsing through the costume jewelry, since it's the only thing we can afford on our lowly initiate credits. Jena breaks the silence, whispering so that the store clerk can't overhear.

"Shiloh, I'm just going to ask one time, because I'll believe whatever you say. But I just have to ask. There isn't anything going on between you and Eric? Romantically I mean." Jena pulls a purple bracelet on to her wrist, studying it rather than looking at me. Hazel and Natasha lean take a few steps closer to us. I bite my lip.

"No, nothing has happened between us. I promise." Jena studies me for a minute, but then she nods. I feel a bit guilty. I'm not lying this time. Nothing has happened between Eric and I. But that doesn't mean that I don't wish something would happen. It's practically all I think about. Natasha has floated over to the cases holding the expensive jewelry.

"Shiloh, come look at this! This would go perfect with your eyes!" She exclaims, waving me over excitedly. I stand next to her, gazing into an array of gemstones. She points to a necklace in the center. It's got a silver chain, and in the center is a delicate piece of silver that swirls like vines, that sort of mimic my tattoo. The very center is set with a beautiful gray gemstone, unlike anything I've ever seen before. It's exquisite.

"Yeah, like I could afford that." I mutter. It's tagged with a ten thousand point price, and is one of the most expensive pieces in the case. Natasha sighs.

"If only we were already in Dauntless and had more points. We'd still have to save up a ton for that though." That's when I remember that Eric had decided not to cut anyone, since there were only eleven initiates left. I smile to myself. I certainly can't tell them that, because why would Eric share something like that with me if we weren't involved with one another? I can't share it, but I can be happy about it. We're all going to make it. We're all going to be Dauntless.

We head back over to the costume jewelry. I find a pair of silver hoop earrings I like, while Hazel buys a gold bracelet and red ring. Jena ends up buying the purple bracelet she originally tried on. Jewelry is really the only way to add any color to a Dauntless outfit. The boys are waiting for us outside, sweaty like they'd been running around causing mischief. Which was probably the case. They also look grimy, like they'd been army crawling on the ground or something. I decide I don't even want to know what they've been up to. Sam grins at the look on my face.

"Hey girls. We were going to go shower and then we thought we could all go hang near the chasm for a little. Or maybe go and see a movie." Pierce is bouncing around, trying to kiss a laughing Natasha, who is shoving his sweaty body away from her. I can't say I blame her. Everyone's ears perk up at the word "movie" because we haven't been to seen one yet. Before the factions existed, before the time of the big war that had decimated most of the world, people were obsessed with these things called movies. Basically, it was some people's job to pretend to be someone they're not, and create a whole story for other people to watch. Recently, some of those movies had been found, and Dauntless had restored them, and started showing them.

"Shiloh, are you going to move back into to the dorm now that Tom is gone?" Felix asks, leaning against a wall. His tone is friendly enough, but I can see the challenge in his green eyes. His eyebrows raise slightly, waiting. He wants to catch me in a lie.

"I guess, unless Eric thinks that Tom might come back. I'll have to ask him if he thinks it's safe." I reply cautiously. My stomach drops a bit. I actually hadn't thought about the full repercussions of Tom escaping from Dauntless. I would see a whole lot less than Eric if I left his apartment. And our initiation was going to be over soon. Then Eric would go back to being a full-time leader, and where would I be? I can't stop the slight frown that crosses over my face. Felix's eyes narrow.

"Hey, why don't you go get your stuff and then meet us back at the dorm. Then we can all come back to the Pit and go see something." Jena suggests, oblivious to everything. Cam tries to throw his arm around her shoulder, and she smacks it away viciously.

"Okay. I'll do that." I say, trying not to sound too sad about it. We start walking, though the girls stay far away from the boys. We separate back at the Pit; they head to their dorms, and I head to Eric's apartment, deep in thought.

I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't want to leave his apartment. I don't want to give up our morning walks to the dining hall, the smell of him next to me at night. But what if I don't have a choice? I could be completely wrong about Eric. He might want me to leave. I'm second guessing myself now.

It feels funny to be walking by myself to his apartment. I know I'm safe now, but I still can't help the feeling I get. I run past the spot where Tom had grabbed me, my throat constricted. When I reach the outside of Eric's door, I stop for a second, catching my breath. If Eric's in his apartment, I don't want to look like a basket case. I fix my hair, and open the door.

Eric is here, reading over some report, and leaning back in his chair. My stomach flutters just at the sight of him. I can't even gauge how badly I want him. How badly I want him to want me. How much I already love him. It's all become a part of me, and I don't know if I can go back from that. It scares me. Eric glances up at me, his eyes stopping on my face, and my heart is racing. I take a few steps toward him.

"Did you get everything sorted out? I saw you sitting with your friends." He asks, turning back to his report. His voice is so neutral that it hurts. Just this morning, he was comforting me, and now he seems like he couldn't care less. Maybe I am wrong about him. I take in a gulp of air.

"Yeah. They're fine. They want me to move back in to the dorm with them though, since Tom is gone." Eric's face doesn't react, but I see his fist clench the paper. Or maybe I'm right.

"That should be fine." Eric's voice is gravelly, and he avoids looking at me. I bite my lip. I want him to say no, that I should stay. Even if he has to make up a reason. But he's not going to. I stand up, walking towards the bathroom to collect my stuff. Then I stop. I need to know. Even if I'm going to embarrass myself, and risk Eric thinking I'm ridiculous, I need to know if there's anything here. Because if there isn't, I've got a long climb to make out of the hole I've dug myself in to. Without turning back, I squeak out a sentence.

"If you want me to stay, just ask me." The room is completely silent. I barely dare to breath. His voice meets my ears.

"What did you say?" I'm pretty sure he heard me the first time. His voice is breathy, and closer to me than I'd thought. I turn around, and find him standing inches behind me. I take another deep breath, and force myself to look up into his eyes.

"If you want me to stay, just ask me." I repeat, not moving my eyes from his. Eric's face is unreadable, simply studying my face with scrutiny. He takes another step to me, until we couldn't stand any closer. Still, his eyes stay locked on mine. But then, I see it in his face. Everything we've been avoiding, everything we've been trying to hide from each other comes crashing down on us. In one moment, he envelops his arms around my waist, pulling me up to him. I don't have time to think as he presses his lips to mine. I just throw my arms around his shoulders, pulling myself closer.

His kiss isn't gentle, but I would never expect Eric to be gentle. It's so unlike Tom's kiss though, so unlike how I've ever been kissed before. His lips roughly dominate mine, and all I can think is that I want more. The tugging in my stomach has turned to fire. It's encompassed my whole body now. My whole body is burning, and I like it. I want to be closer to him. I try and pull myself up, so I can be closer to his face. Eric responds immediately, and remedies the situation. He easily lifts me against him, one of his arms wrapping tighter against my back, the other falling to support my legs. I wrap my legs around his waist, pressing myself against his chest.

His kiss has slowed now, and he's exploring my mouth with his tongue. I've only been kissed like this once before, by Tom, and Eric is so unlike Tom that he barely crosses my mind. I focus on Eric, rather than my kissing technique. I enjoy the feel of his strong body touching mine. The strength of his shoulders that my arms lay against. His arms bulging against my back, and under my legs. His hand has slipped underneath my shirt, and he massages my back with his fingers. I shudder, and run a hand over the side of his neck. I rest my hand of his shoulder, and then let it travel across his chest, wanting to feel him with my fingertips. A groan escapes his lips, reverberating through his whole body.

He pulls away from me, more gently than I'd think he would be capable of. His face stays near mine so that our foreheads still touch. I've never seen his eyes like this. Eric's eyes burn with something more powerful than his anger. It's almost animalistic. But there's also something else. Something that reminds me of the tugging that I get when I'm near him.

"Stay." Eric demands, his voice deep like a growl. He touches his lips to mine desperately, before pulling away again.

"Stay." He says again, lower this time. His lips trail over my jaw, and I shiver against him. My hands caress his hair as he kisses my neck, murmuring against my skin. The word "stay" over and over again. He moves to my collarbone, and he pulls aside my shirt so he can kiss my tattoo. His lips move back to my neck, sucking on the soft skin there. I clutch his shoulders, a small whimper leaving me. Eric brings his eyes back to me, a smirk evident on his face, clearly enjoying the power he has over me. He thrusts his lips back on mine.

A few minutes later, I remember that I'm supposed to be meeting my friends. They might get a little suspicious if I don't show up. Felix in particular. I tell Eric this in between our kisses.

"They're going to think that I lied to them. What if they tell everyone in Dauntless that we're together?" I gasp out as his lips part from mine.

"I don't care." Eric's voice is gruff as he returns to my neck. I forget momentarily what I was so worried about.

"But…I…I don't think we should tell anyone until after initiation is over." I finally manage. Eric kisses me again, before pulling away and studying my face.

"Fine." He chokes out. I sigh sadly as he gently sets me down. I'm sure my face is flushed, and my hair a mess, so I turn towards the bathroom to fix myself up. Eric grabs my arm, swinging me around back to him. His lips attack mine again, and I'm lost for a minute. I come to my senses as he kisses underneath my ear.

"Eriiiic." I half-groan, half-laugh, pushing him away from me unconvincingly.. He smirks at me, his icy eyes lit up.

"I'm not sorry. I can't help it." Eric tells me. But he lets me go this time.

** Okay so what did you think? Happy something finally happened? ;) Don****'t worry though, there's still much story to be told. I feel like they still need to really get to know each other. And even though I do think they love each other, right now it's mostly physical. Speaking of physical, there will be lemons shortly. I'm still not sure how graphic said lemons will be, though they won't be graphic enough so that my story gets deleted. If you guys want to send me a PM of a story that you like the lemons in, please do so so that I can have a frame of mind as to what you are looking for! Also, please please keep reviewing, following, and favoriting, it means so much to me!**


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